So, last night would have been the sweetest and most romantic thing that any happy girlfriend could have hoped for. But, I'm not a happy girlfriend, and last night made me hate myself even more. He still loves me, he's still fighting for me.. but I can't fight for this anymore. I'm not happy here, and I feel worse for pretending to be. It's ( Read more... )

Last night, was amazing, I was happy. Then it went spiraling into hell. (Ask me for details, and I might supply). Went home.. longest car ride.. of my life. Longer than when my dad caught me smoking pot at Aarons and drove me home. Longest, and the most painful. I tried last night, I tried to do the hardest thing I can think of doing. I ( Read more... )

EVERYTHING ( Read more... )

I feel like dancing in the rain tonight. I don't mind being locked in my mind so much today. I feel like making something beautiful... do you ever wish you could fly?

.... today has been a great day ;)

Everything is so hard right now. I know in the end everything will be fine.. it's getting to that point that is going to be hard. There have been moments recently.. where I have been the happiest I have either ever been, or at least the happiest I have been in a very very long time. I don't know.. I really need to vent.. I need to cry, I need to ( Read more... )

I've been so utterly happy lately. Honestly, I feel like I'm flying sometimes. Then I remeber what I have to do.. and I come screaming back down to reality. This is so fucking hard... *sigh*. I know what I have to do now.. doing that is what's going to be hard. I just want today to be all happy. I don't want to think of the sad shit right now ( Read more... )

(x) Rocky Horror Picture Show (sniff... I know... I'm deprived ( Read more... )

heh.. I have three livejournals now o.0 Maybe there is something wrong with me lol. I'm in a really good mood still, I hope it lasts a little bit longer.

So, even though everything sucks, and I feel like my heart is being ripped out and trampled on by this issue, at complete fault of my own.. I'm having a pretty good day I guess. Michelle has been making me feel utterly awesome all day. I haven't hung out with most of my friends lately, and I've felt like crap for that, so it's really good to get ( Read more... )

So, I walked out of my house today.. and there were two ducks in my driveway...wtf? Lol, I dunno it made me laugh, which was good. I ended up sleeping pretty easily last night when I finally wanted to. I felt very comforted. I'm trying to be in a good mood today. Michelle bought me breakfast, and even gave me some good advice on this.. whether ( Read more... )