Well....No change in grannie. She's still in icu. They had to give her a blood transfusion because she is not carrying her oxygen at all and without the breathing aparatus she would not breathe at all ( Read more... )

their faces are so loose
not yet numbed by years of cruel jokes
the lights have not yet faded
the night so bright
not yet surrendered to dawn's
star stealing
speaking not to be heard
thinking for the next thought

Dad has cancer among other things and is dying. Granny has dementia and is dying. Mom had been suicidal over the other two but I was reasonably sure she'd find away out of that.

Now she's got cancer too.

I don't know what she'll do.

Seriously. I'm feeling chatty and introspective...this may be tmi- (too much info) for some...It's 6 am and I have NO ONE TO TALK TO! Paper journal isn't cutting it lately ( Read more... )

Just look at me
and put one in fast
or slow
let me squeeze
your life out
one more
blinding me again
just don't move too much
just give me everything
you are
I'll do it all
you just look
make me understand
patience
not so hard
not so fast
just everything
as much of you
as I can take
as you can give

The dad called last night ( Read more... )

to know how you taste ( Read more... )

Ok- you all remember how I met mike, right? I basicly picked him up off the street, cleaned him up and made him a viable human being. He didn't drink at all to speak of while he was here and only smoked pot with the occasional harmless snort here and there ( Read more... )

and really the end of the tunnel ( Read more... )

It's been over a week now and I still can't drag myself up. My bootstraps seem to be broken ( Read more... )