Wow, isn't it funny how when you think you're getting along with people, all of a sudden, from nowhere you start to wonder what you were thinking ( Read more... )

Time: 2:36am
Essay Status: DONE!!! 1,273 words....ok so its not quite 1500 words like it is supposed to be but i really doubt that my tutor will notice if it is 200 words or so under. i am just relieved to have the stupid thing finally finished.
hooray! *victory dance*

Essay status: 540 words...about 900 to go ( Read more... )

Time: 1:00pm Sunday afternoon ( Read more... )

Fuck. I don't even know how to verbalise this. I feel like I should write this down, that's what this journal is for, right? But...how can I write this down when my thoughts and my emotions are not making sense? They're not forming clear patterns. All I'm getting are random words, a random stream of my consciousness. Life. Death. Whore. Me? ( Read more... )

The car is packed and my life (well, parts of it anyways) are in boxes. My parents have been on the verge of tears for the past week and this still hasn't really sunk in for me yet. I've said goodbye to everyone who is important to me and my room no longer feels like my own....
Wow...I guess that this really does mean I'm leaving home.

Shit.*hides

One more broken heart
One more tear on my pillow
Another voice in my head
Someone else I shouldn't have let into my bed
One more reason to fear the world
Another reason to hate myself
One more reason to doubt my worth
One more night I'll cry myself to sleep
Another regret to add to the list.

my world and all of my oh so carefully laid plans just turned themselves upside down! mine is a world gone topsy turvy...the result of this being that i have to act as adult as my 18 years say that i am and make a decision as to what i plan to do for the rest of my life ( Read more... )

As hard as I try, my demons won't disappear. I feel that I'm ok now. That the places, people and events which have haunted me have evaporated or become bearable ( Read more... )

For some strange reason, i always thought that growing up, turning 18, becoming an adult and leaving school would be easy. Oh how wrong i was...I haven't even finished my exams yet and I'm expected to make decisions which will change my life, forever. I always thought that I would relish this opportunity to do what I want to do, live my life my way ( Read more... )