super junior, various, his favorite {(4/6)}
Title: His Favorite (4/6)
Fandom: Super Junior
Main Pairings: Kangin/Sungmin, Siwon/Sungmin
Minor Pairings: Sungmin/OCs, Kangin/OCs, Kangin/Yesung, Kangin/Yoon-ji, Kangin/Yoon-ji/Sungmin, Eunhyuk/Donghae/Sungmin, Eunhyuk/Sungmin, Eunhyuk/Donghae
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Adult Content (character death, disturbing themes, dubious consent, strong sexual content, swearing, extreme violence)
Genre: AU, Angst, Drama, Romance
Word Count: 9,796 (43,360 in total)
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with SM Entertainment or Super Junior. This is all just for fun.
Summary: Because people like us don't get a happy ending.
Author's Note: Please, please, please heed the fic warnings.
Written for yinhyuk. <3
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The music is loud. The bass pulses hard beneath his skin. There are too many people pushing together. Sungmin doesn't let it get to him; he walks into the place like he owns it, it garners more than a few stares, but that's what he wants. To make an impression. As he walks through the crowd on the dance floor, lets wandering hands touch him, but make sure no one tries to get too hands on with him.
He orders a drink when he gets to the bar. While he sips his beer, he takes the opportunity to survey his surroundings. The dance floor is in the middle, tables and chairs are close to the walls, out of the way so people can move. There's a staircase leading up to the second floor where more chairs and tables can be found, and Sungmin knows up there somewhere is the VIP section, and Siwon. There are a few cages for girls to dance in; some of the cages are on the first floor and some of them are higher, where the people on the second floor can appreciate any dancing going on.
Sungmin finishes his beer and heads up the stairs. He sees the VIP section, catches a glimpse of Siwon among a crowd of people, the crowd of hangers on, and heads to the bar that's on the second floor. There's a cage nearby Siwon, but there's a girl already in it. It's okay, Sungmin's patient.
Thankfully he doesn't have to wait too long. No one's really paying attention to her, or rather, Siwon isn't, and she eventually gives up. Climbing out of the cage, she hurries to rejoin her friends with a disappointed look on her face. Sungmin has to wonder how many people have tried the same thing he's about to, and how many of them have actually succeeded.
When he gets to the cage, a burly hand stops him. "Sorry, girls only."
Sungmin levels a smirk his way. "I can be a girl if you want me to be."
Confused eyes blink back at him. "Eh... what?"
"Hansoo," A voice calls; it's another bouncer, Hansoo's superior, "let him in the cage," the new bouncer gives Sungmin a once over, Sungmin can tell the man is obviously appreciating what he's seeing, "he's pretty enough."
Hansoo nods quickly and takes his hand away. Sungmin steps into the cage with a wink.
In the middle of a cage is a pole, bolted down to the floor and extending up all the way to the cage's roof. It's cramped, but Sungmin can work with it. Closing his eyes, Sungmin calms the nervous fluttering in his heart, a nervousness he didn't even think he'd have, and listens to the music pulsing around him, the beat, and takes it in himself. His hips are the first part of him that start moving. He has a great ass, he knows that, and he intends to let it do all the work.
Dancing isn't something he does often, but it is something Sungmin enjoys. Sometimes he'll let Donghae and Hyukjae drag him to a club - especially when Youngwoon is busy with someone else - and losing himself to the music, grinding up against either Donghae or Hyukjae or sometimes both, is always a lot of fun. His two friends aren't with him now, but Sungmin still finds himself getting into the motions easy enough.
Sungmin uses his hands, slides them over his hips, his stomach. His shirt rides up, exposing his flat stomach, and when it happens there's a cheer, and when Sungmin opens his eyes he's surprised to find he's gathered a crowd. Well, that's a start, he thinks with a smirk on his face.
It doesn't take long for Sungmin to whip the small crowd he's gathered into something of a frenzy. He knows just when to bite his lip, how to lower his eyelashes to make himself look more appealing. When his eyes flicker up, quickly so he won't be too obvious, Sungmin finds that Siwon is staring, openly and with an obvious look of interest on his face. Smirking, Sungmin decides he's done just enough to get Siwon's interest without coming off as desperate or obvious.
He steps out of the cage before the song is even done. There's a collective groan from the crowd, but Sungmin ignores their pleading to continue, and heads back down to the first floor. He's alone at the bar for maybe a few minutes when Siwon comes to stand beside him.
"Buy you a drink?"
It's really surprising - Sungmin figured he would have to work harder, be a little more patient and show up a few times during the course of the week to catch Siwon's attention. Sungmin isn't going to complain, though, the sooner Siwon falls for him, the sooner he can have what he wants.
"Sure." Sungmin replies with a smile he knows can charm almost anyone.
And charm Siwon, it does. They talk about silly things; small talk. It's pleasant enough. Siwon is sweet, even a little witty and Sungmin is sure if circumstances were different he probably would have liked Siwon.
Really, it's no surprise that by the end of the evening, Sungmin has his tongue in Siwon's mouth, Siwon has his hands down Sungmin's pants and they're making out in the club's bathroom. They make quite a bit of noise when Siwon pushes him into the bathroom - the door bangs open, a few guys already in there jump and gawk at them.
"Get out." Siwon moans while Sungmin's busy sucking at his neck.
"Wait--," one guy protests, but when Siwon growls, "out!" the poor guy zips up his pants and hurries out of the bathroom.
The others follow, either intimidated or finally recognizing Siwon and realizing he's the owner of the club and if he wants to fuck a really pretty man in the bathroom then, well, that's his prerogative.
Sungmin laughs and steps away from Siwon. Siwon reaches for him, but Sungmin evades with a teasing grin. "You're sexy when you're forceful."
Grinning back at Sungmin, Siwon walks towards him in a few quick strides, hooks an arm around Sungmin's waist before he can escape again, not that Sungmin wants to, and pushes Sungmin against the wall. Sungmin moans when Siwon kisses him - he'd been delighted when he found out Siwon is damn good with that tongue of his. It would make it easier, creating the lie he would need to lure Siwon in, and it feels so damn good when Siwon dips his hand underneath Sungmin's shirt so his fingers can run over the smooth skin of Sungmin's belly.
Someone hasn't touched him with such needy desperation in years. While his sex life with Youngwoon is still pretty active, the fire that has always been there is slowly being extinguished until there is nothing left to pull them together so ferociously like all the times before.
Quickly flipping their positions so that Siwon is the one leaning against the wall, Sungmin nips at Siwon's bottom lip before slowly sinking to his knees. Siwon leans his head back, closes his eyes and groans in anticipation. Sungmin wastes no time getting Siwon's pants undone and his cock out. Siwon makes the sweetest sounds when Sungmin takes him into his mouth. He gasps, he sucks his bottom lip between his teeth and tries not to whimper, but it's futile. Sungmin's skilled tongue has Siwon making all kinds of noises.
Soon enough Sungmin feels a hand on his head. It's gentle, not trying to force Sungmin to do anything.
When Siwon is too close to coming, he pulls Sungmin up and gasps, "I want to fuck you," into Sungmin's mouth.
"Then do it." Sungmin replies.
"Can't." Siwon looks so endearingly disappointed. "Don't have lube."
Sungmin huffs a laugh and reaches inside his leather jacket to pull out a thin tube. "Got it taken care of." Sungmin taps the end of the tube against Siwon's nose.
"Were you looking to get lucky tonight?" Siwon asks.
"No, but I've learned to always come prepared."
"Fuck." Siwon whines and kisses him again.
It turns out Siwon is something of a romantic, even when he's busy screwing a stranger. When Sungmin tries to turn around so Siwon can take him from behind, Siwon shakes his head and says something about wanting to see Sungmin's face.
"It's going to make things harder." Sungmin warns.
"I know, but it will be worth it."
Turns out Siwon's right. He's slow as he helps pull Sungmin's jeans, underwear, socks and shoes off. It should be embarrassing, it even is a little, but Siwon manages to distract him by moving his hands down Sungmin's thighs, over his calves.
It's almost like Siwon's trying to take every part of him in. Commit Sungmin to memory; the way his smooth skin feels underneath Siwon's hands, the sounds Sungmin makes when Siwon touches him in all the right places. Siwon also knows not to tease too much, and when Sungmin's jeans are hooked over one of the stalls' doors, he's pressed up against Sungmin again and kissing him like his very existence is wrapped up in that kiss.
Sungmin is sure Siwon will drop him, but with his legs wrapped around Siwon's waist, the taller man manages to keep them up with the help of the wall. He pushes into Sungmin; it's so hot and Siwon feels so good, and breathing is hard as Siwon's begins setting a steady pace. It would seem Siwon suffers from the same problem; his breathing is erratic, soft little puffs of air flutter against Sungmin's neck where Siwon's face is buried.
"Fuck." Sungmin moans, tightening his grip around Siwon's shoulders.
Siwon laughs, thrusts in hard, and Sungmin swears he can see stars.
They're interrupted when the bathroom door slams open and a drunk guy stumbles in. He stares, blinks a little, Siwon never stops moving and Sungmin never stops moaning, but Sungmin gives a little smirk to their intruder, lets his lips fall open just a little so he can look terribly debauched, and the man scrambles to get out with a, "oh shit, sorry!" thrown over his shoulder.
The brief interruption seems to excite Siwon even more. Sungmin knows it was thrilling for himself.
It doesn't take long for either of them to come.
"I've never done this before." Siwon says a few minutes later as he watches Sungmin pull on his jeans.
Sungmin gives him a startled glance. "Really? You fucked well for a virgin."
"No." Siwon laughs, shaking his head. A blush is forming in his cheeks and his dimples are showing. It's all a little too charming for Sungmin's liking. "I wasn't a virgin. I meant, it's the first time having sex with someone I don't know."
Sungmin smiles, grabs Siwon and pulls him in for one last kiss. "Well, it was my pleasure." Then he turns to leave, but just as he does, Siwon grabs his hand, stopping him.
"What's your name?"
"I thought this was supposed to be a fling." Sungmin says. "No names, no strings."
"Just..." It's cute how eager Siwon is. When Siwon pulls him closer again, Sungmin doesn't even try to resist. "Tell me your name." Siwon's pleading now. With his voice, his eyes, and the slow kiss he gives Sungmin that, strangely enough, makes Sungmin heart beat painfully hard against his chest.
"Sungmin." He murmurs against Siwon's lips.
"Want to come home with me, Sungmin?"
Sungmin hesitates just long enough before breathing out a pleased, "yes."
This is really too easy.
=+=
"You know, looking at you, I'd say you're one of those good boy types. Not someone who picks up a guy at a club and then decides to spend the weekend with him." Sungmin says while he lounges on Siwon's bed.
He's naked, of course, only partially covered by Siwon's expensive Egyptian cotton sheets. The bed is huge, probably the best thing about Siwon's apartment. No, Sungmin thinks quickly as he reconsiders, Siwon's shower is definitely the best thing about his apartment.
"I used to be, I guess." Siwon says as he climbs back onto the bed. Unlike Sungmin, he's wearing at least a pair of boxers. "You can say I'm going through a rebellious phase." Siwon's fingers trail up his calves, thighs and over Sungmin's ass before splaying out over the small of Sungmin's back.
Sungmin chuckles. "That's cute. Do you go to that club often?"
"I own it." Siwon replies. He sounds so casual; as if everyone he knows owns a club.
"Oh really? I didn't know." Sungmin lies easily.
Siwon flips Sungmin onto his back and crawls on top of him. "We really don't have to keep talking about me."
Sungmin hums, folds his arms around Siwon's neck, hooks his hands together and spreads his legs so Siwon can settle between them. "Have something to hide?"
"Maybe." Siwon replies.
"You know, I should be going home soon." Sungmin gasps as Siwon nibbles at his ear.
"Mh." Siwon isn't listening. He's too busy licking, sucking and nipping at Sungmin's skin.
"Siwon."
Siwon silences him with a kiss. Sungmin decides staying one more night won't hurt.
=+=
Sungmin ends up spending the whole weekend at Siwon's apartment. He gets a few calls from Youngwoon that he chooses to ignore. Eventually his phone's battery dies and there are no more calls to interrupt what he's doing with Siwon.
On Monday morning, Sungmin and Siwon have sex one last time in the apartment's ridiculously large shower, and while he has Siwon pressed up against him, water spraying around him, the shower is definitely confirmed as Sungmin's favorite feature in the apartment.
Along with being a bit of a romantic, Siwon also turns to have gentlemanly tendencies. He offers to take Sungmin home, insists on it really, and it takes a lot of persuasion and careful thinking to convince Siwon that it's not necessary. Eventually Siwon relents, but only if Sungmin promises that they'll see each other again.
With the exchanging of phone numbers and a promise to meet up again the club the following Friday, Sungmin heads back home.
Of course Youngwoon isn't home. Sungmin knew he wouldn't be, and he's grateful. He needs to get cleaned up before Youngwoon can work out what he's been up to. Sungmin knows without a doubt that Youngwoon won't be pleased with the way Sungmin is handling his new mission, but Sungmin doesn't care as much as he once would have. He's tired of playing by Youngwoon's rules; he has done so for far too long and if Sungmin gets to have a little fun with Siwon before exacting his revenge, then all the better.
Once Sungmin's cleaned up and ready, he heads to the office where he knows Youngwoon is probably making everyone's lives hell.
As expected, Youngwoon is on the phone, snapping at whoever's on the other line to find Sungmin and find him now. When Sungmin walks into the office, Youngwoon pauses, his eyes narrow and he growls a, "never mind. He just walked in," before slamming the phone down.
"Where the hell have you been?"
"Doing the job you gave me." Sungmin replies casually as Youngwoon gets up from behind the desk. "I made contact with Choi Siwon."
"Did he fuck you?" Youngwoon is standing in front of him now, looking him over. Thankfully, most of the marks Siwon managed to leave behind are well hidden by his layer of clothing and Sungmin knows he'll have to avoid Youngwoon's bed for a few days and let them fade.
"No." The lie is easier to tell than it once would have been. Just a few years ago the guilt would have eaten at him, but now Sungmin feels nothing.
Youngwoon stares. Sungmin makes sure to maintain eye contact. Eventually Youngwoon gives up, not finding anything to give the lie away and Sungmin almost smiles, but he manages to hold it back.
"Well?" Youngwoon steps back, leans his weight against his desk and crosses his arms over his chest. "What's our dear Siwon like?"
What's Siwon like? He's sweet, a hell of a lot nicer than someone like him should be. A little naive maybe; no, Sungmin reconsiders, Siwon's very naive, almost embarrassingly so. The thing that stands out about him is the fact that he doesn't seem to have a mean bone in his body. Of course Sungmin realizes he's only known Siwon for a short weekend where conversation was interrupted by frequent bouts of sex, and he could be very wrong about Siwon. The gentlemanly sweetness, the kindness could all be an act.
Just like it had been for Youngwoon.
In fact, Sungmin hopes it is just an act. Whether Siwon is nice or not won't change what he has to do, but Siwon turning into a real asshole would certainly make his job easier.
"Well?" Youngwoon prompts again when Sungmin takes too long to respond.
"He's a typical rich guy." And that's true, too, but Sungmin wisely decides to leave out the part that while Siwon is indeed very typically rich in some ways, he doesn't seem to be too obnoxious by his wealth. "There's almost nothing special about him except for the fact that he was born into a wealthy family."
"Hn." Youngwoon nods, taking the information in. "Do you think you'll be able to get what we want?"
"Yes."
"And what makes you so sure he's going to spill all of his daddy's secrets to you?"
"I have my ways."
Youngwoon snorts and is about to say something when the intercom on his desk beeps. "What is it?"
"There's someone here to see you, sir." His assistant's voice says.
"I'm busy."
"It's Kim Jongwoon, sir."
The change in Youngwoon's attitude is immediate. A grin spreads across his handsome face, a light enters his eyes, a light that is almost always dimmed by the world around him.
He looks happier, younger even, almost like that teenage boy Sungmin had been so charmed by as a child. Looking at this Youngwoon, the one who is truly happy, Sungmin isn't sure what to think. Of course he's seen it before - the few times Jongwoon bothers to visit, Youngwoon will come alive and it always hurt before. Feelings of being inadequate, second best, were always difficult to deal with.
Sungmin waits for the pain and nothing happens.
He still feels so little, too numb, when Jongwoon steps inside the office. There's still no jealousy or bitter resentment when Youngwoon practically scoops the smaller man into his arms.
"Urgh, Youngwoon," Jongwoon whines through a laugh, "Get off me, idiot."
Youngwoon grins back. "Shut up, asshole. I can tell you've missed me." He replies. Their easy banter speak of a friendship years old; they have a kind of intimacy Sungmin has learned won't always come with sex. Sungmin doesn't know their story - no amount of asking has ever yielded any answers. Jongwoon is a secret Youngwoon keeps locked close to his heart.
"Sungmin-sshi." Jongwoon greets politely when he finally manages to escape from Youngwoon's embrace. "You look well." Jongwoon is always polite when the two of them meet, but Sungmin knows Jongwoon doesn't like him. The feeling is mutual for obvious reasons.
"Thanks." Sungmin replies, not bothering to play the game of false politeness. "I'll leave you two to catch up."
Youngwoon seems relieved that he won't have to ask Sungmin to go away. When Sungmin moves to leave, Youngwoon grabs him, pulls him close and whispers, "Well done," into his hair before letting him go again.
Sungmin hates how much that tiny bit of approval, of pride, still means to him.
=+=
"So how exactly are you going to play this?" Hyukjae asks.
It's a week later and Sungmin is getting ready for his night with Siwon while Hyukjae and Donghae keep him company.
"I think it's obvious how I'm going to play this." Sungmin replies while he battles getting his eyeliner just right. Donghae offered to help, but it was quickly made very clear that Donghae knew nothing about putting makeup on no matter how totally easy it looked.
Hyukjae, from his position on Sungmin's bed, frowns. Sungmin isn't stupid - he's seen the jealousy in his own eyes enough times over the years to recognize it in someone else's. Hyukjae's feelings for him haven't dwindled over the years and while Hyukjae's made peace with the knowledge that something will never happen between them, there's still a part of Hyukjae that clings to the memory of the night he had Sungmin.
"Speaking of which, I need Donghae's help." Sungmin touches the corner of his eye with his pinky, hoping to smooth the eyeliner out a little. Sitting back, he stares and nods, happy enough with the result before throwing the eyeliner pencil back into his makeup bag.
"With what?" Donghae asks. He's lounging on the bed next to Hyukjae. Pushing himself up, and resting on his elbows, Donghae blinks at him.
"Siwon suffers from hero syndrome, I need to exploit that."
"So what do you need me to do?"
"I need you to pretend to be a persistent ex-boyfriend."
"Hey," Hyukjae objects, "why do you need his help and not mine?"
Sungmin flashes Hyukjae an apologetic smile. "Sorry, but you don't really paint a very menacing picture."
"Wow, that hurts." Hyukjae mutters while Donghae laughs madly beside him. Not even a punch to Donghae's shoulder stops his delighted chuckling. "Okay, whatever, but you could handle yourself anyway."
"Yes, but Siwon doesn't know that. This is all just a lie, Hyukjae. Remember that."
"I'm not the one who has to remember that." Hyukjae mutters darkly. Sungmin pretends he doesn't hear him.
=+=
Siwon has his people keep an eye out for Sungmin's appearance, it seems, because Sungmin's barely touched the drink he's ordered when Siwon's hand folds around his elbow. The kiss Siwon gives Sungmin when he pulls Sungmin close is a wonderful reminder why Sungmin chose to spend a weekend with the handsome man.
"I take it you missed me." Sungmin murmurs.
Siwon only smiles, takes his hand and leads Sungmin up the stairs to the section solely reserved for Siwon and those he deems important enough. Sungmin makes a show of clinging to Siwon's side, looking just nervous enough to be endearing, as Siwon introduces Sungmin to his friends. Of course Siwon's natural instincts as protector kick in, and Siwon happily keeps Sungmin close to him as his many friends tease them with comments that range from cute to downright rude. Sungmin almost rolls his eyes a few times, at how easy it is to dupe these people, but he always catches himself and smiles sweetly instead.
Thankfully they don't spend too much time talking with Siwon's friends. While his friends chat, flirt and even argue around them, Siwon and Sungmin only pay attention to each other. Siwon keeps things from becoming too heated, leaving his displays of affection to kissing Sungmin lightly on the lips or whispering in his ear. It's fun, Sungmin decides. Siwon is very good at flirting and Sungmin enjoys the attention.
An hour in, his phone buzzes inside his jacket pocket. Sungmin doesn't need to look at the text to know that Donghae and Hyukjae have arrived, and it's time to get the next act of their little play started.
Sungmin manages to get away from Siwon easy enough - all it takes is mentioning needing the restroom and another drink for Siwon to let him go. He wanders downstairs and spots Hyukjae and Donghae easily enough; they're standing near the edge of the bar, a little away from everyone else. As always, the two have an instinctual reaction to the pulse of the music and both are moving to the beat while eyeing the dance floor longingly.
"You ready?" Sungmin asks Donghae when he nears them.
Donghae nods eagerly while Hyukjae says, "I still think I'm the one who should be doing this. Donghae doesn't know how to intimidate a puppy."
"Hey." Donghae whines, pouting. Hyukjae waves his hand at Donghae's face, as if it proves his point.
"We've been over this." Sungmin grabs Donghae's shot of tequila, ignores the indignant protest, and downs it in one go.
"Yeah," Hyukjae snaps, ignoring the glare Sungmin's giving him, "and your reasoning sucks because you haven't given me a reason."
"Fine. You want a reason? I don't want you to do it."
The hurt in Hyukjae's eyes is exactly what Sungmin wanted to avoid.
"Okay, whatever." Hyukjae mutters, pushing himself away from the bar. "I'll see you two later."
"I get you don't want to hurt him or give him false hope." Donghae says when Hyukjae's disappeared. "But that's not really the way to do it."
Sungmin doesn't say anything. There's really nothing he can say.
"How long do you think it's going to take lover boy to come looking for you?" Donghae asks after a few minutes of painfully awkward silence.
"Not long." Sungmin replies.
It takes roughly thirty minutes before Siwon starts getting worried. Sungmin, on the lookout for him, spots Siwon before the taller man sees him and pulling Donghae close, he whispers a, "be ready."
Sungmin makes sure Siwon has spotted them before pushing Donghae away from him while using as much force as possible. There is a second where Donghae looks taken aback, and Sungmin fears that Donghae really won't be able to do this. But then something changes, Donghae's expression morphs into something darker, something Sungmin has never ever seen before, even on the few times Donghae does manage to get serious.
Donghae grabs Sungmin's wrist and squeezes. It's painful, Donghae's grip being more powerful than Sungmin expected. There will be marks, maybe even bruises. Donghae pulls him close, forces his mouth on Sungmin's, tries to deepen the kiss and Sungmin's momentarily taken aback.
It's a little exciting, his body instinctively reacts to seeing the more dangerous side to Donghae. He soon remembers that he's supposed to be fighting back, though and pulls away before slapping Donghae as hard as he can. By that point they've already drawn attention, and Siwon's pushing his way through the crowd, desperate to get to them.
"Let him go." Siwon says when he's close.
Donghae sends an indifferent look Siwon's way. "Fuck off, asshole. Minnie and I are talking."
"You know this guy?" Siwon asks, gaze flickering to Sungmin.
Sungmin opens his mouth to respond, but Donghae quickly cuts in. "I said fuck off. Whether we know each other is none of you fucking business."
"Donghae." Sungmin says, making sure to sound a little desperate, just afraid enough for Siwon to pick up on. "Go home. I told you I don't want to see you anymore." He tries, not very hard of course, to escape from Donghae's hold, but Donghae pulls him back, Sungmin loses his balance and almost falls which, in turn, seems to send Siwon into some kind of rage.
Siwon grabs Donghae, Donghae reacts quickly, letting Sungmin go and throwing a punch before Siwon can even think of blocking.
Sungmin, taken by surprise, gapes as Siwon stumbles back. Donghae steps forward, ready to continue the fight, but the bouncers, having realized their boss was close to landing himself in trouble, quickly step in and pull Donghae back and away, ready to throw him out. Donghae, still caught up in his role as troublemaker, struggle against men twice his size, screaming profanities at them as they drag him outside.
Sungmin doesn't keep his attention on Donghae. He quickly scrambles forward to check on Siwon, a slew of apologies falling from his lips as he tries to check Siwon over.
"It's okay." Siwon smiles, or tries to. He winces and chuckles a little when he realizes he has a split lip. "Really it's okay."
"No, it's not okay." Sungmin says, digging his fingers into Siwon's leather jacket. "I shouldn't..." Sighing, Sungmin shakes his head. "I should leave." He says and tries to do so, but as he'd hoped, Siwon's stops him.
"None of what happened here is your fault." Siwon manages more of a smile this time. "I'll make sure the bouncers know not to let him in again."
Sungmin pretends to be unsure. When Siwon wraps his arms around him, though, Sungmin doesn't resist. He buries his face into Siwon's chest, hoping it will make him look vulnerable enough. It works - Siwon tightens his grip and says, "You're obviously shaken. Come back to my place with me?"
Sungmin nods eagerly.
=+=
"Who was that guy, anyway?" Siwon asks after they've worked through the adrenaline the evening has provided.
Siwon was particularly attentive during sex; going slow, he made sure the whole thing was about Sungmin, probably thinking Sungmin needed it after being handled so roughly (as predicted, bruises were indeed forming on Sungmin's wrists, and Siwon made the most endearing sounds as he kissed them).
"An ex-boyfriend." Sungmin replies. "One that doesn't like being told no." Sungmin shrugs and looks down at his hands as he wrings them together. "I sure know how to pick them."
"Hey," Siwon's voice is too gentle; it grates on Sungmin's nerves and he isn't sure why, "I won't hurt you." He presses himself against Sungmin's naked back, wraps his arms around Sungmin's waist.
"I bet you say that to all the guys." Sungmin teases. The conversation has gone down a road he didn't want it to, and the sincerity in Siwon's voice makes him feel uncomfortable.
"Only the pretty ones." Siwon jokes back.
Sungmin finds himself legitimately laughing.
=+=
"Is Donghae okay?" Sungmin asks. Siwon is asleep and he has to keep his voice low; it's probably not necessary. His apartment is so damn big anyway.
"Yeah," Hyukjae says on the other end; he still sounds pissed, "they beat him up a little, but I managed to get them to stop when I threatened to call the cops."
Sungmin winces. "Tell him I'm sorry."
"Nah," Hyukjae actually chuckles a little, "he's been bragging about how badass he was all night. Said he actually managed to punch Siwon - can't say I wouldn't have liked to see that."
Sungmin laughs too. It's much more halfhearted than Hyukjae's, but his friend doesn't pick up on it. "Tell him I'm proud of him, and I owe him a drink."
"Will do."
Sungmin ends the call and makes his way back to Siwon's bedroom. When he crawls back into the bed, Siwon reaches for him, murmuring a sleepy, "everything alright?" and Sungmin happily settles into his embrace.
"Everything's fine."
=+=
Sungmin has a plan.
Hyukjae questions it. Donghae isn't sure it even exists, but he trusts Sungmin enough to nod his head when Sungmin says everything is under control. And Youngwoon... well, Youngwoon thinks he knows Sungmin well enough to be certain that Sungmin has thought the situation through before jumping in.
The thing about Sungmin's plan is it's going to take time. It also requires getting closer to the enemy than anyone would ever recommend. Sungmin isn't stupid, though and this isn't some cliché Hollywood movie where he'll lose sight of what he has to do and fall in love with Siwon. That's absurd. Sungmin knows how to keep his distance; he isn't at all affected by the dimpled smiles Siwon sends his way, or the almost awed look in Siwon's eyes when they have sex.
The way Siwon's hands feel on his skin is pleasing, incredible even, but Sungmin doesn't allow himself to get caught up in it. He definitely doesn't think about it all day or hope for more of those moments.
Or so he tells himself.
Sungmin has a plan and it's working well.
Maybe too well.
=+=
Hands are covering his eyes. It takes a lot of Sungmin's self control to not feel trapped, to laugh in delight instead as Siwon carefully leads him up staircase.
"We're almost there." Siwon assures.
"Usually I take exception to people kidnapping me and leading me to strange places, but I'll make an exception for you."
Siwon laughs, unaware of how true Sungmin's words are. "You'll enjoy it. I promise."
Sungmin reaches behind him, places a palm over Siwon's crotch. "I'm enjoying it already."
"There will be time for that later." Siwon says, pulling Sungmin's hand away. "But surprise first."
"I don't know, that thing in your pants is really surprising. Wonderfully surprising, of course."
"You're shameless."
Sungmin hears the sound of a door opening and the rush of cool air against his skin as Siwon carefully leads him outside. He can hear the sound of the city; cars driving, people living. He doesn't need Siwon to remove his hand to know where they are. The roof of Siwon's apartment building had an incredible view of Seoul.
Sungmin once escaped to the roof to try and think, to figure out what he was doing. Of course Siwon had found him, but instead of trying to fill the silence with needless small talk, Siwon had remained perfectly quiet.
It's something Sungmin still appreciates.
Sungmin isn't sure why Siwon would take them up there again. It's all made clear when Siwon pulls his hand away, and Sungmin notices a small round table, set for two with the finest china plates and crystal glasses.
It's cheesy and so typically Siwon that Sungmin has to laugh at it.
"Do you like it?" The hope in his voice squeezes at Sungmin's heart.
"I do." Sungmin steps towards the table, from the corner of his eye he can see Seoul bathed in the red, gold and orange light of a setting sun. "It's a surprise, though."
Siwon pushes the metal door closed behind him. "I wanted to celebrate the fact that we've known each other for a month."
"What? Like a month-aversary?" Sungmin teases.
"Something like that." Siwon replies, grinning. "Sungmin," He steps close, folds his hands around Sungmin's, "I know it hasn't been long and I don't really know where this is going, but I like spending time with you. I like having you in my life, and I don't want you to look so sad anymore."
The last bit takes Sungmin by surprise. He wants to laugh it, play the ignorant card, but Siwon won't let him. The look in Siwon's eyes tells Sungmin he'll be able to see through any kind of lie Sungmin could come up with, and it's too much. Sungmin pushes himself into Siwon's arms and leans his forehead against Siwon's shoulder. As always, Siwon doesn't hesitate to hold him close.
=+=
Spending the night with Siwon feels like a bad idea. Siwon is disappointed, of course, and Sungmin tells himself he's not taken by the looks Siwon gives him. He needs time to reflect on the situation without Siwon influencing what he thinks or how he views the steady progression of his plan.
When he gets home, Sungmin actually feels like he can breathe again. It's too late for Yu-ni to greet him, and Sungmin feels a moment of regret. He hasn't been able to spend as much time with her as he usually would, giving too much of himself to his plan, and it makes him feel awful, but when this is done, his soul can rest and he'll give everything to Yu-ni to make it up to her.
Maybe when Youngwoon has what he wants, he'll consider letting Sungmin give up his role as the company's attack dog.
Sungmin's taken the first step up the staircase when he hears two voices in the sitting room. He recognizes Youngwoon's easily enough, and it doesn't take him long to realize the other voice belongs to Jongwoon.
Jongwoon hasn't left the country yet, which in itself is a little strange. The man always seems so desperate to get out of Seoul, but now Jongwoon seems content to stay. Whatever demons were always nipping at his heels, chasing him away, seem to have taken a break.
"I'm still pissed you didn't come to my wedding." Sungmin hears Youngwoon say.
"I couldn't stand to watch you get married to someone else." Jongwoon replies. "You should know that."
"Rich coming from the person who walked out on me."
Any hope of just moving on and letting them have their private conversation flies out the window. Sungmin, slowly and carefully, nears the room where they are and just listens. He doesn't try to peek into the room; there's always too much of a chance that they'll see him and then he won't hear the things he's been dying to know.
"Just because I left doesn't mean I didn't love you." Jongwoon actually sounds a little annoyed. "Besides, you already had Sungmin's broken heart to deal with, you didn't need mine."
The mention of his name surprises Sungmin.
"Hn."
"Speaking of which, do you regret it yet?"
"Regret what? My marriage?"
"No, you idiot. I mean Sungmin... do you regret it yet?"
Sungmin has no idea what it could be. There are too many things Jongwoon could be referring to, but Sungmin doesn't like Jongwoon's tone of voice, or any of the things he could be talking about.
"No." Youngwoon says and Sungmin isn't sure if it's the answer he wanted. Sungmin doesn't know which answer would have been the ideal one. Then there's a sigh and a, "Maybe... sometimes."
Sungmin's had enough. Youngwoon's voice, the little hint of regret, hurts and cuts into Sungmin like a hot knife. Youngwoon, despite how far they've fallen, or the distance that has wedged itself between them, is still the love of Sungmin's life and if Youngwoon regrets them in any kind of way, like it seems he does, then it would be a blow Sungmin's not sure he'll survive.
Escaping to his bedroom is the only way Sungmin can keep his sanity.
When he's showered and doesn't smell like Siwon anymore, Sungmin goes and checks on Yu-ni. She's fast asleep and not even Sungmin kissing her forehead wakes her up. He wishes he could sleep as she does, so peacefully without any kind of worry tainting her dreams. He'll make sure she won't ever go through what he did. Her childhood will not be taken from her as his was taken from him.
Back in his own room, Sungmin thinks about the plan.
Siwon is falling and he's falling fast, and Sungmin needs to get what Youngwoon wants before that flame of passion fades. The next part of Sungmin's plan is going to require careful planning and will be too easy to mess up if it's not done correctly. Hyukjae's already expressed worry over what exactly Sungmin intends to do, but then Hyukjae hates any part of what Sungmin's doing so Sungmin doesn't think too much about what Hyukjae's opinion is.
An hour or so later, there's a knock on his door. Sungmin says nothing, he knows Youngwoon will come in whether he gives permission or not.
"I'm surprised you're home." Youngwoon comments as he steps inside. Sungmin still remains stubbornly silent. "Are you mad at me?"
"Why would I be mad at you?" Sungmin asks, finally breaking his silence.
"You've been very mad lately." Youngwoon sits down on the bed.
"Are you really surprised?"
"No." Youngwoon trails his fingers over Sungmin's cheek, down his jaw and neck and pauses at his shoulder. "I don't like how long you're taking getting what I need. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you enjoy Siwon's company." There's a pause and Youngwoon laughs lightly. "Good thing I know better."
When Youngwoon tries to kiss him, Sungmin turns his face away. They haven't been intimate in weeks. Youngwoon's too busy with Jongwoon and whoever else he can find, and Sungmin's too busy with Siwon. He never thought the day would come, but the idea of Youngwoon touching him, fucking him, disgusts him to the point where he almost feels ill.
It's frightening to feel this way. For so long he's yearned for Youngwoon in a way that was almost obsessive, and to be freed of that longing to always be with Youngwoon is both a relief and overwhelming.
Youngwoon pulls away with a frown. "You're taking too long. Get me results."
Sungmin nods. When Youngwoon leaves without another word, Sungmin flops onto his back and stares at the ceiling. Youngwoon's right, he is taking too long. It's time to move things along.
He isn't sure why it leaves him feeling so terrible.
=+=
"You're insane." Hyukjae says.
Donghae is nodding and looks a little worried.
Even Kyuhyun seems unsure.
Sungmin doesn't care. "Do it." He says, nodding to Kyuhyun.
"If you're sure." Kyuhyun murmurs and reluctantly pushes the enter key on his laptop's keyboard.
When a message saying, "Sent!" flashes on Kyuhyun's screen, Sungmin feels the beginning of uncertainty. Convincing himself he did the right thing is no longer as easy as it was just a few minutes ago.
"This isn't going to work." Hyukjae has never sounded so afraid before. "They're going to kill you. Siwon won't stop them - when he finds out who you are, who you work for, he'll want them to kill you."
"Siwon is in love with me." Sungmin replies. "He'll intervene. He's too much of a nice guy not to." Saying it makes Sungmin feel terrible, because it's so true. Siwon is too nice to be stuck in the family he's in; the world of scheming and backstabbing and murdering.
"And if he doesn't?" This time it's Donghae who voices the uncertainty everyone is feeling.
Sungmin shrugs, trying not to look as nervous as he feels. "Then I guess I die."
"Fuck this shit." Hyukjae growls and storms from the room. Donghae follows.
Sungmin sighs.
=+=
The second part of the plan is simple, really. It involves Sungmin doing something he would never do - exposing himself.
All it takes is one simple push of a button on Kyuhyun's laptop and everything about Sungmin, who he is, what he does for Kim Youngwoon, and his recent dalliance with Siwon, is sent to Choi Kiho.
Hyukjae's right, it really is risky. Siwon will find out, will realize he's been played and will, of course, be hurt. Sungmin will be captured and, well, what happens next will then depend on Siwon and how deep his feelings for Sungmin go.
It's not a kind of move Sungmin would ever consider under normal circumstances, but this plan has always been a little desperate and has always required more cunning than any other kind of job Sungmin has ever been on. It's required more of him as a person.
He's needed to give more of himself than ever before. When he has his revenge, when the Choi family is broken, as broken as he's been since the day his parents were murdered while he hid underneath a stupid little bed, powerless to help them, then it will all be worth it.
First, his gamble needs to pay off.
The evening starts off well enough. Siwon is all smiles and sweet kisses when he and Sungmin head out for dinner. Sungmin makes sure not to let his apprehension show - he must do a good enough job because Siwon doesn't seem to pick up on anything being wrong. Sungmin isn't so sure why he's still so surprised; he's turned out to be a better liar than he could ever have imagined.
During dinner at quite a fancy restaurant, Siwon finally notices something is amiss when he recognizes that they've been followed by a few of his father's men. Of course he thinks they're there for him, that his father has found out about his newest relationship and wants an eye kept on him so he doesn't do anything to embarrass the family.
Siwon's whole mood changes. He hasn't spoken of Kiho very often, or his relationship with his family, but Sungmin has picked up on how caged Siwon feels by his father's high expectations.
"Let's go." Siwon says, fishing money out of his wallet and throwing it on the table. It's far too much, they've only ordered drinks so far, but Siwon has his arm in a grip and is leading him out of the restaurant before Sungmin can comment.
"Siwon." Sungmin says as the taller man pulls him down the street. Siwon's car is in the opposite direction. Sungmin has no idea what he's thinking of doing - even Siwon should know they can't outrun them. "What's going on?"
"My father doesn't know how to mind his own business." Siwon looks over his shoulder, Sungmin does the same and sure enough, Kiho's men are hot on their heels. "Seems some of his men have been keeping an eye on us throughout the whole evening. I should have realized it sooner. I'm sorry."
"Don't say sorry." Sungmin replies.
"Usually my father's happy to leave me alone as long as I don't do anything that could embarrass him. He must have realized my feelings for you aren't going to go away any time soon and now he feels he needs to watch me. It's ridiculous."
Siwon leads them through a few back alleys. Sungmin still isn't sure why they didn't just go to Siwon's car and when he asks, Siwon's response is, "there's a tracker in my car. We'll never get rid of them and I really don't want to deal with them tonight. I'll have someone pick up the car tomorrow."
Siwon doesn't get his wish. His father's men already know all his tricks, and Sungmin and Siwon walk straight into a trap. When Siwon heads into a new alley, he stops, swears under his breath when he sees two men, obviously his father's, waiting for them at the end of the alley. Behind them they can hear the sound of those following them coming closer.
"Siwon-nim." One says, bowing respectfully and Sungmin assumes he's the leader. "Please take a step away from your companion."
"What's going on, Kibum? Why are you following me? What does my father want now?"
Kibum's eyes flicker towards Sungmin. "Please step away from him, Sir."
"Why should I?"
"Because he works for Kim Youngwoon and I can't guarantee your safety while you're so close to a trained killer."
"What?" Siwon actually laughs. "That's absurd. Sungmin isn't..." He looks at Sungmin and the brief amusement fades when he sees the look on Sungmin's face. "Tell me they're lying." Siwon begs, actually begs and it's heartbreaking seeing the devastation on his face when he realizes the last month has been a lie; that he'd been played. "Tell me they're lying!" Sungmin winces. It hurts, which is something Sungmin never expected, and he actually feels so damn awful as he stares at the person he's betrayed.
"Siwon, I can explain--," Sungmin tries to touch Siwon, but Siwon pulls his arm away and finally steps back.
"I don't want you to explain." Siwon squeezes his eyes shut, buries his hands in his hair as he tries to process everything. "It's all been a lie. Everything. From the first..."
"Siwon, please." Sungmin is surprised by how distressed he sounds. How sore his heart is, is equally as surprising.
"Save it." Siwon's eyes are open again and the sweetness that's always been there is gone. For the first time he looks like Sungmin always imagined a son of Choi Kiho would look like; cold, unfeeling. Like the person he's looking at isn't worth his time. "Take him. Do what you want." Siwon says and walks away.
Kibum gives his men a curt nod before following Siwon.
Sungmin could fight them off, he supposes, but he knows a lost battle when sees one and he's come too far to give up on Siwon now.
That and he'll need all the strength he has to face what's coming.
=+=
A splash of icy cold water pulls Sungmin out of unconsciousness. He splutters and it feels like he's drowning, but the hand grabbing his sopping hair and pulling it back, so that he can look his torturer in the eye. It's difficult - the light in the room is very dim and his one eye is already swollen shut from the beating he took earlier.
He can taste blood on his tongue - his lip is stinging, and he knows it's been split. Sungmin's whole face is aching, his head is pounding, and Sungmin lost track of time hours ago, just before he lost consciousness the first time.
"Wake up, sleeping beauty." The man whispers in his ear. "I have more questions for you."
Sungmin keeps quiet. He hasn't given his torturer the satisfaction of hearing him whimper, not while conscious anyway, and he has no plans to start now.
"Ease up, Woojin." A voice nearby says, and when Woojin pulls away, Sungmin can sort of make out the figure of the other person in charge of extracting information from him.
"I'm going to ask you again: what does Kim Youngwoon want?"
Sungmin spits out some of the blood in his mouth and laughs as he says, "he already has what he wants."
"Which is?"
"Your mother spreading her legs for him every night."
The blow Woojin's friend deals him echoes through the room. Sungmin isn't sure, it's difficult to think, but he imagines he heard something cracking.
Ignoring the pain in his cheek, both inside and out, or the way his brain is screaming at him is an almost impossible task. The blow reminded him of the way his arms burn, being pulled back behind him with his wrists tied closely together. The metal of the cuffs are cutting into his skin. He can feel the tickling sensation that comes along with thin blood trails running down his hands and dripping down his fingers.
Unfortunately, Sungmin can't keep himself from gasping when Woojin's friend wraps a hand around his throat and squeezes.
"Stupid move." He hisses, his face close enough that Sungmin can feel the man's warm, moist breath against his skin. "I can make your last moments hell so that you'll be begging me to end your life."
It's a typical threat. Even if it's true, which Sungmin supposes it is, it's so boring that there's no way Sungmin can take him seriously. Showing his contempt the only way he can, Sungmin spits in his face. The next blow is harder, and the next even worse than that. Eventually Woojin has to stop his friend from going too far.
"Calm down, Hyunwoo."
"Fucking bitch." Hyunwoo growls while wiping his cheek clean with his jacket's sleeve.
Sungmin grins up at him, flashing his bloody teeth.
The torture session lasts for another hour. Midway Sungmin passes out again and is woken up like all the times before - with icy water splashed all over him. He's sopping wet, shivering from the cold air of the room he's in and the icy water dripping from his skin. It takes him a little longer to fully regain consciousness this time, but when he does Sungmin almost regrets it.
Hyunwoo is holding a pair of pliers with a wicked grin on his face. Woojin is next to him, looking just as excited, just as twisted and happy, as his friend.
"We're going to start by pulling your nails out - one by one." Hyunwoo says.
"Your pretty face looks like shit, but we don't want to break it completely." Woojin adds.
"Not yet." Hyunwoo chuckles and Woojin nods.
"When we're done with your pretty little nails, we'll start by cutting those fingers off, and then we'll move onto your hands. We're going to dice you up, pretty boy. Kim Youngwoon won't even recognize you when we're done."
Hyunwoo cackles. "And, you know what? We don't even care if you start spilling your guts. We're going to make you scream and--,"
Hyunwoo's dramatic little speech is cut off by a knock on the door. Hyunwoo groans, Woojin sighs and moves to open the door. The person on the other side is obviously not someone he ever expected, because he stumbles back before bowing. As he does, the person on the other side of the door pushes it fully open and steps inside.
If Siwon is shocked by Sungmin's less than stellar appearance, he doesn't show it.
"S-sir." Hyunwoo stammers. "You really shouldn't be here. Your father--,"
"Shut up." Siwon says and Hyunwoo falls silent immediately. Woojin winces. "Take a break. I need to talk to him."
"But--," Hyunwoo tries again, but quickly swallows the rest of his sentence when Siwon levels him with a glare.
"I said take a break. Come back in an hour. I just need a few answers he won't give anyone except me."
The uncertainty in both Hyunwoo and Woojin isn't going away, but they know putting up a fight is a bad idea. Leaving could be a bad idea, too, especially if their boss finds out about it, but the only Choi in the room right now is Siwon and his threat is more immediate.
Siwon flips the door's lock when the door closes behind them. He sends a glance Sungmin's way, and finally has some sort of reaction regarding Sungmin's beaten and bruised appearance.
"I want you to tell me the truth." Siwon says and Sungmin nods. "So you knew exactly who I was that first time we met?"
"Yes." Sungmin replies. His voice is a little broken and speaking hurts like hell. Every time his lips move, his bruised and bloodied face flares with pain.
"Why? What were you supposed to do?"
"Get close to you. Find out as much about your family as I could."
"You haven't been doing a very good job. You haven't asked me any questions. You barely seemed interested in my family at all."
Sungmin remains quiet, not sure how to say what he needs to say.
"Sungmin..."
"I got caught up in the lie and I didn't know how to get out. I didn't want to get out because..."
"Because?"
"Because I fell in love with you."
It's all part of the plan, Sungmin knows that, but the words come a little too easily. It's a blow when he realizes he actually means it - he has fallen in love with Siwon and knowing nothing can come from it is a bitter pill to swallow.
"How do I know you're not lying?" Siwon looks so hopeful. A little too afraid to believe, but still so eager to.
Sungmin chuckles without any kind of humor. The broken little hitch of his breath, the sob, are all too real. It's okay - despite how humiliated Sungmin feels, the truth will be easier to sell than a lie.
"Okay." Siwon nods. Then he grabs something from the nearby table, the keys to Sungmin's cuffs, and moves to free Sungmin.
"What are you doing?" Sungmin asks.
"Getting you out of here."
"Siwon, wait, you can't--,"
Siwon peeks up at him. "I happen to be in love with you, too, so I can't just sit back and wait for them to kill you. Which they will."
"They'll know you helped me escape."
"Don't worry, I have plan for that."
Being able to move his arms again is a relief. As he thought, his wrists look terrible, rubbed raw and bleeding and with thin little cuts marring smooth skin. Siwon looks terribly guilty, running his fingers over the bruises as gently as he can and sighing when Sungmin inhales sharply.
Sungmin can't really stand on his own. When he gets up, there's a hot flare of pain and Sungmin almost falls, but Siwon catches him with an arm around his waist.
"I'm sorry." Siwon whispers. "I should have stopped them sooner, but I was... angry."
Sungmin turns his head and leans his forehead against Siwon's jaw. "It's not your fault."
Siwon half carries, half drags Sungmin out of that room. He knows exactly how to avoid the people roaming around, probably having studied the patrols before deciding to get Sungmin out of there.
"We're in an apartment building my father owns. One in a... bad part of town." Siwon whispers, leading him to a back door.
The back alley Siwon leads him to has a lone guard in it, but Siwon manages to take care of him easily enough while Sungmin waits in the dark. Siwon returns holding something in his hand. "Your cell phone," he explains, "who do I call?"
"Hyukjae." Sungmin says without hesitation.
Siwon makes the call. While Siwon talks to Hyukjae, Sungmin finds himself slipping in an out of consciousness as his body steadily gives in to the pain. Siwon left him leaning against the brick wall, but when he wakes up he's sitting on the ground with Siwon kneeling next to him.
"Hyukjae is on his way, but we move on a bit before they find us. I kept the door of the room you were in locked, so hopefully they won't realize what's going on."
"Any..." Sungmin groans a bit as Siwon lifts him to his feet. "Any smart person will realize what's going on."
"They're not that smart, don't worry."
"I noticed." Sungmin chuckles, sparing a thought for his two moronic torturers.
They don't go too far. Sungmin still can't walk very well, not with the pain in his leg or his mind spinning as much as it is, and Siwon can't really carry him without drawing too much unwanted attention. They come to a stop in an alley a few buildings away from the one Sungmin had been trapped in for a few hours.
"I'm going to need your friend's help." Siwon says as they wait for Hyukjae to arrive.
"With?" Sungmin can't remember the last time he was this tired. It's difficult not to slip into sweet blackness.
"With making it look like you escaped instead of me helping you. I need your friend to beat me up a little."
"I have a feeling Hyukjae won't mind helping you out."
Hyukjae arrives twenty minutes later. He's got Donghae with him and the betrayed look Siwon gives Sungmin when he recognizes Donghae has Sungmin wincing and murmuring an apology.
"Don't be." Siwon says, but he still looks upset. "It's done."
He doesn't stay too mad, though. Despite their rather violent first meeting, Donghae has Siwon taken aback and maybe a little charmed with a disarmingly bright smile. The smile on Donghae's face does fade away, however, when he finally notices Sungmin.
The last thing Sungmin sees is both Hyukjae and Donghae crowding around him.
<< Next>>
Fandom: Super Junior
Main Pairings: Kangin/Sungmin, Siwon/Sungmin
Minor Pairings: Sungmin/OCs, Kangin/OCs, Kangin/Yesung, Kangin/Yoon-ji, Kangin/Yoon-ji/Sungmin, Eunhyuk/Donghae/Sungmin, Eunhyuk/Sungmin, Eunhyuk/Donghae
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Adult Content (character death, disturbing themes, dubious consent, strong sexual content, swearing, extreme violence)
Genre: AU, Angst, Drama, Romance
Word Count: 9,796 (43,360 in total)
Disclaimer: I am in no way associated with SM Entertainment or Super Junior. This is all just for fun.
Summary: Because people like us don't get a happy ending.
Author's Note: Please, please, please heed the fic warnings.
Written for yinhyuk. <3
<
>
The music is loud. The bass pulses hard beneath his skin. There are too many people pushing together. Sungmin doesn't let it get to him; he walks into the place like he owns it, it garners more than a few stares, but that's what he wants. To make an impression. As he walks through the crowd on the dance floor, lets wandering hands touch him, but make sure no one tries to get too hands on with him.
He orders a drink when he gets to the bar. While he sips his beer, he takes the opportunity to survey his surroundings. The dance floor is in the middle, tables and chairs are close to the walls, out of the way so people can move. There's a staircase leading up to the second floor where more chairs and tables can be found, and Sungmin knows up there somewhere is the VIP section, and Siwon. There are a few cages for girls to dance in; some of the cages are on the first floor and some of them are higher, where the people on the second floor can appreciate any dancing going on.
Sungmin finishes his beer and heads up the stairs. He sees the VIP section, catches a glimpse of Siwon among a crowd of people, the crowd of hangers on, and heads to the bar that's on the second floor. There's a cage nearby Siwon, but there's a girl already in it. It's okay, Sungmin's patient.
Thankfully he doesn't have to wait too long. No one's really paying attention to her, or rather, Siwon isn't, and she eventually gives up. Climbing out of the cage, she hurries to rejoin her friends with a disappointed look on her face. Sungmin has to wonder how many people have tried the same thing he's about to, and how many of them have actually succeeded.
When he gets to the cage, a burly hand stops him. "Sorry, girls only."
Sungmin levels a smirk his way. "I can be a girl if you want me to be."
Confused eyes blink back at him. "Eh... what?"
"Hansoo," A voice calls; it's another bouncer, Hansoo's superior, "let him in the cage," the new bouncer gives Sungmin a once over, Sungmin can tell the man is obviously appreciating what he's seeing, "he's pretty enough."
Hansoo nods quickly and takes his hand away. Sungmin steps into the cage with a wink.
In the middle of a cage is a pole, bolted down to the floor and extending up all the way to the cage's roof. It's cramped, but Sungmin can work with it. Closing his eyes, Sungmin calms the nervous fluttering in his heart, a nervousness he didn't even think he'd have, and listens to the music pulsing around him, the beat, and takes it in himself. His hips are the first part of him that start moving. He has a great ass, he knows that, and he intends to let it do all the work.
Dancing isn't something he does often, but it is something Sungmin enjoys. Sometimes he'll let Donghae and Hyukjae drag him to a club - especially when Youngwoon is busy with someone else - and losing himself to the music, grinding up against either Donghae or Hyukjae or sometimes both, is always a lot of fun. His two friends aren't with him now, but Sungmin still finds himself getting into the motions easy enough.
Sungmin uses his hands, slides them over his hips, his stomach. His shirt rides up, exposing his flat stomach, and when it happens there's a cheer, and when Sungmin opens his eyes he's surprised to find he's gathered a crowd. Well, that's a start, he thinks with a smirk on his face.
It doesn't take long for Sungmin to whip the small crowd he's gathered into something of a frenzy. He knows just when to bite his lip, how to lower his eyelashes to make himself look more appealing. When his eyes flicker up, quickly so he won't be too obvious, Sungmin finds that Siwon is staring, openly and with an obvious look of interest on his face. Smirking, Sungmin decides he's done just enough to get Siwon's interest without coming off as desperate or obvious.
He steps out of the cage before the song is even done. There's a collective groan from the crowd, but Sungmin ignores their pleading to continue, and heads back down to the first floor. He's alone at the bar for maybe a few minutes when Siwon comes to stand beside him.
"Buy you a drink?"
It's really surprising - Sungmin figured he would have to work harder, be a little more patient and show up a few times during the course of the week to catch Siwon's attention. Sungmin isn't going to complain, though, the sooner Siwon falls for him, the sooner he can have what he wants.
"Sure." Sungmin replies with a smile he knows can charm almost anyone.
And charm Siwon, it does. They talk about silly things; small talk. It's pleasant enough. Siwon is sweet, even a little witty and Sungmin is sure if circumstances were different he probably would have liked Siwon.
Really, it's no surprise that by the end of the evening, Sungmin has his tongue in Siwon's mouth, Siwon has his hands down Sungmin's pants and they're making out in the club's bathroom. They make quite a bit of noise when Siwon pushes him into the bathroom - the door bangs open, a few guys already in there jump and gawk at them.
"Get out." Siwon moans while Sungmin's busy sucking at his neck.
"Wait--," one guy protests, but when Siwon growls, "out!" the poor guy zips up his pants and hurries out of the bathroom.
The others follow, either intimidated or finally recognizing Siwon and realizing he's the owner of the club and if he wants to fuck a really pretty man in the bathroom then, well, that's his prerogative.
Sungmin laughs and steps away from Siwon. Siwon reaches for him, but Sungmin evades with a teasing grin. "You're sexy when you're forceful."
Grinning back at Sungmin, Siwon walks towards him in a few quick strides, hooks an arm around Sungmin's waist before he can escape again, not that Sungmin wants to, and pushes Sungmin against the wall. Sungmin moans when Siwon kisses him - he'd been delighted when he found out Siwon is damn good with that tongue of his. It would make it easier, creating the lie he would need to lure Siwon in, and it feels so damn good when Siwon dips his hand underneath Sungmin's shirt so his fingers can run over the smooth skin of Sungmin's belly.
Someone hasn't touched him with such needy desperation in years. While his sex life with Youngwoon is still pretty active, the fire that has always been there is slowly being extinguished until there is nothing left to pull them together so ferociously like all the times before.
Quickly flipping their positions so that Siwon is the one leaning against the wall, Sungmin nips at Siwon's bottom lip before slowly sinking to his knees. Siwon leans his head back, closes his eyes and groans in anticipation. Sungmin wastes no time getting Siwon's pants undone and his cock out. Siwon makes the sweetest sounds when Sungmin takes him into his mouth. He gasps, he sucks his bottom lip between his teeth and tries not to whimper, but it's futile. Sungmin's skilled tongue has Siwon making all kinds of noises.
Soon enough Sungmin feels a hand on his head. It's gentle, not trying to force Sungmin to do anything.
When Siwon is too close to coming, he pulls Sungmin up and gasps, "I want to fuck you," into Sungmin's mouth.
"Then do it." Sungmin replies.
"Can't." Siwon looks so endearingly disappointed. "Don't have lube."
Sungmin huffs a laugh and reaches inside his leather jacket to pull out a thin tube. "Got it taken care of." Sungmin taps the end of the tube against Siwon's nose.
"Were you looking to get lucky tonight?" Siwon asks.
"No, but I've learned to always come prepared."
"Fuck." Siwon whines and kisses him again.
It turns out Siwon is something of a romantic, even when he's busy screwing a stranger. When Sungmin tries to turn around so Siwon can take him from behind, Siwon shakes his head and says something about wanting to see Sungmin's face.
"It's going to make things harder." Sungmin warns.
"I know, but it will be worth it."
Turns out Siwon's right. He's slow as he helps pull Sungmin's jeans, underwear, socks and shoes off. It should be embarrassing, it even is a little, but Siwon manages to distract him by moving his hands down Sungmin's thighs, over his calves.
It's almost like Siwon's trying to take every part of him in. Commit Sungmin to memory; the way his smooth skin feels underneath Siwon's hands, the sounds Sungmin makes when Siwon touches him in all the right places. Siwon also knows not to tease too much, and when Sungmin's jeans are hooked over one of the stalls' doors, he's pressed up against Sungmin again and kissing him like his very existence is wrapped up in that kiss.
Sungmin is sure Siwon will drop him, but with his legs wrapped around Siwon's waist, the taller man manages to keep them up with the help of the wall. He pushes into Sungmin; it's so hot and Siwon feels so good, and breathing is hard as Siwon's begins setting a steady pace. It would seem Siwon suffers from the same problem; his breathing is erratic, soft little puffs of air flutter against Sungmin's neck where Siwon's face is buried.
"Fuck." Sungmin moans, tightening his grip around Siwon's shoulders.
Siwon laughs, thrusts in hard, and Sungmin swears he can see stars.
They're interrupted when the bathroom door slams open and a drunk guy stumbles in. He stares, blinks a little, Siwon never stops moving and Sungmin never stops moaning, but Sungmin gives a little smirk to their intruder, lets his lips fall open just a little so he can look terribly debauched, and the man scrambles to get out with a, "oh shit, sorry!" thrown over his shoulder.
The brief interruption seems to excite Siwon even more. Sungmin knows it was thrilling for himself.
It doesn't take long for either of them to come.
"I've never done this before." Siwon says a few minutes later as he watches Sungmin pull on his jeans.
Sungmin gives him a startled glance. "Really? You fucked well for a virgin."
"No." Siwon laughs, shaking his head. A blush is forming in his cheeks and his dimples are showing. It's all a little too charming for Sungmin's liking. "I wasn't a virgin. I meant, it's the first time having sex with someone I don't know."
Sungmin smiles, grabs Siwon and pulls him in for one last kiss. "Well, it was my pleasure." Then he turns to leave, but just as he does, Siwon grabs his hand, stopping him.
"What's your name?"
"I thought this was supposed to be a fling." Sungmin says. "No names, no strings."
"Just..." It's cute how eager Siwon is. When Siwon pulls him closer again, Sungmin doesn't even try to resist. "Tell me your name." Siwon's pleading now. With his voice, his eyes, and the slow kiss he gives Sungmin that, strangely enough, makes Sungmin heart beat painfully hard against his chest.
"Sungmin." He murmurs against Siwon's lips.
"Want to come home with me, Sungmin?"
Sungmin hesitates just long enough before breathing out a pleased, "yes."
This is really too easy.
=+=
"You know, looking at you, I'd say you're one of those good boy types. Not someone who picks up a guy at a club and then decides to spend the weekend with him." Sungmin says while he lounges on Siwon's bed.
He's naked, of course, only partially covered by Siwon's expensive Egyptian cotton sheets. The bed is huge, probably the best thing about Siwon's apartment. No, Sungmin thinks quickly as he reconsiders, Siwon's shower is definitely the best thing about his apartment.
"I used to be, I guess." Siwon says as he climbs back onto the bed. Unlike Sungmin, he's wearing at least a pair of boxers. "You can say I'm going through a rebellious phase." Siwon's fingers trail up his calves, thighs and over Sungmin's ass before splaying out over the small of Sungmin's back.
Sungmin chuckles. "That's cute. Do you go to that club often?"
"I own it." Siwon replies. He sounds so casual; as if everyone he knows owns a club.
"Oh really? I didn't know." Sungmin lies easily.
Siwon flips Sungmin onto his back and crawls on top of him. "We really don't have to keep talking about me."
Sungmin hums, folds his arms around Siwon's neck, hooks his hands together and spreads his legs so Siwon can settle between them. "Have something to hide?"
"Maybe." Siwon replies.
"You know, I should be going home soon." Sungmin gasps as Siwon nibbles at his ear.
"Mh." Siwon isn't listening. He's too busy licking, sucking and nipping at Sungmin's skin.
"Siwon."
Siwon silences him with a kiss. Sungmin decides staying one more night won't hurt.
=+=
Sungmin ends up spending the whole weekend at Siwon's apartment. He gets a few calls from Youngwoon that he chooses to ignore. Eventually his phone's battery dies and there are no more calls to interrupt what he's doing with Siwon.
On Monday morning, Sungmin and Siwon have sex one last time in the apartment's ridiculously large shower, and while he has Siwon pressed up against him, water spraying around him, the shower is definitely confirmed as Sungmin's favorite feature in the apartment.
Along with being a bit of a romantic, Siwon also turns to have gentlemanly tendencies. He offers to take Sungmin home, insists on it really, and it takes a lot of persuasion and careful thinking to convince Siwon that it's not necessary. Eventually Siwon relents, but only if Sungmin promises that they'll see each other again.
With the exchanging of phone numbers and a promise to meet up again the club the following Friday, Sungmin heads back home.
Of course Youngwoon isn't home. Sungmin knew he wouldn't be, and he's grateful. He needs to get cleaned up before Youngwoon can work out what he's been up to. Sungmin knows without a doubt that Youngwoon won't be pleased with the way Sungmin is handling his new mission, but Sungmin doesn't care as much as he once would have. He's tired of playing by Youngwoon's rules; he has done so for far too long and if Sungmin gets to have a little fun with Siwon before exacting his revenge, then all the better.
Once Sungmin's cleaned up and ready, he heads to the office where he knows Youngwoon is probably making everyone's lives hell.
As expected, Youngwoon is on the phone, snapping at whoever's on the other line to find Sungmin and find him now. When Sungmin walks into the office, Youngwoon pauses, his eyes narrow and he growls a, "never mind. He just walked in," before slamming the phone down.
"Where the hell have you been?"
"Doing the job you gave me." Sungmin replies casually as Youngwoon gets up from behind the desk. "I made contact with Choi Siwon."
"Did he fuck you?" Youngwoon is standing in front of him now, looking him over. Thankfully, most of the marks Siwon managed to leave behind are well hidden by his layer of clothing and Sungmin knows he'll have to avoid Youngwoon's bed for a few days and let them fade.
"No." The lie is easier to tell than it once would have been. Just a few years ago the guilt would have eaten at him, but now Sungmin feels nothing.
Youngwoon stares. Sungmin makes sure to maintain eye contact. Eventually Youngwoon gives up, not finding anything to give the lie away and Sungmin almost smiles, but he manages to hold it back.
"Well?" Youngwoon steps back, leans his weight against his desk and crosses his arms over his chest. "What's our dear Siwon like?"
What's Siwon like? He's sweet, a hell of a lot nicer than someone like him should be. A little naive maybe; no, Sungmin reconsiders, Siwon's very naive, almost embarrassingly so. The thing that stands out about him is the fact that he doesn't seem to have a mean bone in his body. Of course Sungmin realizes he's only known Siwon for a short weekend where conversation was interrupted by frequent bouts of sex, and he could be very wrong about Siwon. The gentlemanly sweetness, the kindness could all be an act.
Just like it had been for Youngwoon.
In fact, Sungmin hopes it is just an act. Whether Siwon is nice or not won't change what he has to do, but Siwon turning into a real asshole would certainly make his job easier.
"Well?" Youngwoon prompts again when Sungmin takes too long to respond.
"He's a typical rich guy." And that's true, too, but Sungmin wisely decides to leave out the part that while Siwon is indeed very typically rich in some ways, he doesn't seem to be too obnoxious by his wealth. "There's almost nothing special about him except for the fact that he was born into a wealthy family."
"Hn." Youngwoon nods, taking the information in. "Do you think you'll be able to get what we want?"
"Yes."
"And what makes you so sure he's going to spill all of his daddy's secrets to you?"
"I have my ways."
Youngwoon snorts and is about to say something when the intercom on his desk beeps. "What is it?"
"There's someone here to see you, sir." His assistant's voice says.
"I'm busy."
"It's Kim Jongwoon, sir."
The change in Youngwoon's attitude is immediate. A grin spreads across his handsome face, a light enters his eyes, a light that is almost always dimmed by the world around him.
He looks happier, younger even, almost like that teenage boy Sungmin had been so charmed by as a child. Looking at this Youngwoon, the one who is truly happy, Sungmin isn't sure what to think. Of course he's seen it before - the few times Jongwoon bothers to visit, Youngwoon will come alive and it always hurt before. Feelings of being inadequate, second best, were always difficult to deal with.
Sungmin waits for the pain and nothing happens.
He still feels so little, too numb, when Jongwoon steps inside the office. There's still no jealousy or bitter resentment when Youngwoon practically scoops the smaller man into his arms.
"Urgh, Youngwoon," Jongwoon whines through a laugh, "Get off me, idiot."
Youngwoon grins back. "Shut up, asshole. I can tell you've missed me." He replies. Their easy banter speak of a friendship years old; they have a kind of intimacy Sungmin has learned won't always come with sex. Sungmin doesn't know their story - no amount of asking has ever yielded any answers. Jongwoon is a secret Youngwoon keeps locked close to his heart.
"Sungmin-sshi." Jongwoon greets politely when he finally manages to escape from Youngwoon's embrace. "You look well." Jongwoon is always polite when the two of them meet, but Sungmin knows Jongwoon doesn't like him. The feeling is mutual for obvious reasons.
"Thanks." Sungmin replies, not bothering to play the game of false politeness. "I'll leave you two to catch up."
Youngwoon seems relieved that he won't have to ask Sungmin to go away. When Sungmin moves to leave, Youngwoon grabs him, pulls him close and whispers, "Well done," into his hair before letting him go again.
Sungmin hates how much that tiny bit of approval, of pride, still means to him.
=+=
"So how exactly are you going to play this?" Hyukjae asks.
It's a week later and Sungmin is getting ready for his night with Siwon while Hyukjae and Donghae keep him company.
"I think it's obvious how I'm going to play this." Sungmin replies while he battles getting his eyeliner just right. Donghae offered to help, but it was quickly made very clear that Donghae knew nothing about putting makeup on no matter how totally easy it looked.
Hyukjae, from his position on Sungmin's bed, frowns. Sungmin isn't stupid - he's seen the jealousy in his own eyes enough times over the years to recognize it in someone else's. Hyukjae's feelings for him haven't dwindled over the years and while Hyukjae's made peace with the knowledge that something will never happen between them, there's still a part of Hyukjae that clings to the memory of the night he had Sungmin.
"Speaking of which, I need Donghae's help." Sungmin touches the corner of his eye with his pinky, hoping to smooth the eyeliner out a little. Sitting back, he stares and nods, happy enough with the result before throwing the eyeliner pencil back into his makeup bag.
"With what?" Donghae asks. He's lounging on the bed next to Hyukjae. Pushing himself up, and resting on his elbows, Donghae blinks at him.
"Siwon suffers from hero syndrome, I need to exploit that."
"So what do you need me to do?"
"I need you to pretend to be a persistent ex-boyfriend."
"Hey," Hyukjae objects, "why do you need his help and not mine?"
Sungmin flashes Hyukjae an apologetic smile. "Sorry, but you don't really paint a very menacing picture."
"Wow, that hurts." Hyukjae mutters while Donghae laughs madly beside him. Not even a punch to Donghae's shoulder stops his delighted chuckling. "Okay, whatever, but you could handle yourself anyway."
"Yes, but Siwon doesn't know that. This is all just a lie, Hyukjae. Remember that."
"I'm not the one who has to remember that." Hyukjae mutters darkly. Sungmin pretends he doesn't hear him.
=+=
Siwon has his people keep an eye out for Sungmin's appearance, it seems, because Sungmin's barely touched the drink he's ordered when Siwon's hand folds around his elbow. The kiss Siwon gives Sungmin when he pulls Sungmin close is a wonderful reminder why Sungmin chose to spend a weekend with the handsome man.
"I take it you missed me." Sungmin murmurs.
Siwon only smiles, takes his hand and leads Sungmin up the stairs to the section solely reserved for Siwon and those he deems important enough. Sungmin makes a show of clinging to Siwon's side, looking just nervous enough to be endearing, as Siwon introduces Sungmin to his friends. Of course Siwon's natural instincts as protector kick in, and Siwon happily keeps Sungmin close to him as his many friends tease them with comments that range from cute to downright rude. Sungmin almost rolls his eyes a few times, at how easy it is to dupe these people, but he always catches himself and smiles sweetly instead.
Thankfully they don't spend too much time talking with Siwon's friends. While his friends chat, flirt and even argue around them, Siwon and Sungmin only pay attention to each other. Siwon keeps things from becoming too heated, leaving his displays of affection to kissing Sungmin lightly on the lips or whispering in his ear. It's fun, Sungmin decides. Siwon is very good at flirting and Sungmin enjoys the attention.
An hour in, his phone buzzes inside his jacket pocket. Sungmin doesn't need to look at the text to know that Donghae and Hyukjae have arrived, and it's time to get the next act of their little play started.
Sungmin manages to get away from Siwon easy enough - all it takes is mentioning needing the restroom and another drink for Siwon to let him go. He wanders downstairs and spots Hyukjae and Donghae easily enough; they're standing near the edge of the bar, a little away from everyone else. As always, the two have an instinctual reaction to the pulse of the music and both are moving to the beat while eyeing the dance floor longingly.
"You ready?" Sungmin asks Donghae when he nears them.
Donghae nods eagerly while Hyukjae says, "I still think I'm the one who should be doing this. Donghae doesn't know how to intimidate a puppy."
"Hey." Donghae whines, pouting. Hyukjae waves his hand at Donghae's face, as if it proves his point.
"We've been over this." Sungmin grabs Donghae's shot of tequila, ignores the indignant protest, and downs it in one go.
"Yeah," Hyukjae snaps, ignoring the glare Sungmin's giving him, "and your reasoning sucks because you haven't given me a reason."
"Fine. You want a reason? I don't want you to do it."
The hurt in Hyukjae's eyes is exactly what Sungmin wanted to avoid.
"Okay, whatever." Hyukjae mutters, pushing himself away from the bar. "I'll see you two later."
"I get you don't want to hurt him or give him false hope." Donghae says when Hyukjae's disappeared. "But that's not really the way to do it."
Sungmin doesn't say anything. There's really nothing he can say.
"How long do you think it's going to take lover boy to come looking for you?" Donghae asks after a few minutes of painfully awkward silence.
"Not long." Sungmin replies.
It takes roughly thirty minutes before Siwon starts getting worried. Sungmin, on the lookout for him, spots Siwon before the taller man sees him and pulling Donghae close, he whispers a, "be ready."
Sungmin makes sure Siwon has spotted them before pushing Donghae away from him while using as much force as possible. There is a second where Donghae looks taken aback, and Sungmin fears that Donghae really won't be able to do this. But then something changes, Donghae's expression morphs into something darker, something Sungmin has never ever seen before, even on the few times Donghae does manage to get serious.
Donghae grabs Sungmin's wrist and squeezes. It's painful, Donghae's grip being more powerful than Sungmin expected. There will be marks, maybe even bruises. Donghae pulls him close, forces his mouth on Sungmin's, tries to deepen the kiss and Sungmin's momentarily taken aback.
It's a little exciting, his body instinctively reacts to seeing the more dangerous side to Donghae. He soon remembers that he's supposed to be fighting back, though and pulls away before slapping Donghae as hard as he can. By that point they've already drawn attention, and Siwon's pushing his way through the crowd, desperate to get to them.
"Let him go." Siwon says when he's close.
Donghae sends an indifferent look Siwon's way. "Fuck off, asshole. Minnie and I are talking."
"You know this guy?" Siwon asks, gaze flickering to Sungmin.
Sungmin opens his mouth to respond, but Donghae quickly cuts in. "I said fuck off. Whether we know each other is none of you fucking business."
"Donghae." Sungmin says, making sure to sound a little desperate, just afraid enough for Siwon to pick up on. "Go home. I told you I don't want to see you anymore." He tries, not very hard of course, to escape from Donghae's hold, but Donghae pulls him back, Sungmin loses his balance and almost falls which, in turn, seems to send Siwon into some kind of rage.
Siwon grabs Donghae, Donghae reacts quickly, letting Sungmin go and throwing a punch before Siwon can even think of blocking.
Sungmin, taken by surprise, gapes as Siwon stumbles back. Donghae steps forward, ready to continue the fight, but the bouncers, having realized their boss was close to landing himself in trouble, quickly step in and pull Donghae back and away, ready to throw him out. Donghae, still caught up in his role as troublemaker, struggle against men twice his size, screaming profanities at them as they drag him outside.
Sungmin doesn't keep his attention on Donghae. He quickly scrambles forward to check on Siwon, a slew of apologies falling from his lips as he tries to check Siwon over.
"It's okay." Siwon smiles, or tries to. He winces and chuckles a little when he realizes he has a split lip. "Really it's okay."
"No, it's not okay." Sungmin says, digging his fingers into Siwon's leather jacket. "I shouldn't..." Sighing, Sungmin shakes his head. "I should leave." He says and tries to do so, but as he'd hoped, Siwon's stops him.
"None of what happened here is your fault." Siwon manages more of a smile this time. "I'll make sure the bouncers know not to let him in again."
Sungmin pretends to be unsure. When Siwon wraps his arms around him, though, Sungmin doesn't resist. He buries his face into Siwon's chest, hoping it will make him look vulnerable enough. It works - Siwon tightens his grip and says, "You're obviously shaken. Come back to my place with me?"
Sungmin nods eagerly.
=+=
"Who was that guy, anyway?" Siwon asks after they've worked through the adrenaline the evening has provided.
Siwon was particularly attentive during sex; going slow, he made sure the whole thing was about Sungmin, probably thinking Sungmin needed it after being handled so roughly (as predicted, bruises were indeed forming on Sungmin's wrists, and Siwon made the most endearing sounds as he kissed them).
"An ex-boyfriend." Sungmin replies. "One that doesn't like being told no." Sungmin shrugs and looks down at his hands as he wrings them together. "I sure know how to pick them."
"Hey," Siwon's voice is too gentle; it grates on Sungmin's nerves and he isn't sure why, "I won't hurt you." He presses himself against Sungmin's naked back, wraps his arms around Sungmin's waist.
"I bet you say that to all the guys." Sungmin teases. The conversation has gone down a road he didn't want it to, and the sincerity in Siwon's voice makes him feel uncomfortable.
"Only the pretty ones." Siwon jokes back.
Sungmin finds himself legitimately laughing.
=+=
"Is Donghae okay?" Sungmin asks. Siwon is asleep and he has to keep his voice low; it's probably not necessary. His apartment is so damn big anyway.
"Yeah," Hyukjae says on the other end; he still sounds pissed, "they beat him up a little, but I managed to get them to stop when I threatened to call the cops."
Sungmin winces. "Tell him I'm sorry."
"Nah," Hyukjae actually chuckles a little, "he's been bragging about how badass he was all night. Said he actually managed to punch Siwon - can't say I wouldn't have liked to see that."
Sungmin laughs too. It's much more halfhearted than Hyukjae's, but his friend doesn't pick up on it. "Tell him I'm proud of him, and I owe him a drink."
"Will do."
Sungmin ends the call and makes his way back to Siwon's bedroom. When he crawls back into the bed, Siwon reaches for him, murmuring a sleepy, "everything alright?" and Sungmin happily settles into his embrace.
"Everything's fine."
=+=
Sungmin has a plan.
Hyukjae questions it. Donghae isn't sure it even exists, but he trusts Sungmin enough to nod his head when Sungmin says everything is under control. And Youngwoon... well, Youngwoon thinks he knows Sungmin well enough to be certain that Sungmin has thought the situation through before jumping in.
The thing about Sungmin's plan is it's going to take time. It also requires getting closer to the enemy than anyone would ever recommend. Sungmin isn't stupid, though and this isn't some cliché Hollywood movie where he'll lose sight of what he has to do and fall in love with Siwon. That's absurd. Sungmin knows how to keep his distance; he isn't at all affected by the dimpled smiles Siwon sends his way, or the almost awed look in Siwon's eyes when they have sex.
The way Siwon's hands feel on his skin is pleasing, incredible even, but Sungmin doesn't allow himself to get caught up in it. He definitely doesn't think about it all day or hope for more of those moments.
Or so he tells himself.
Sungmin has a plan and it's working well.
Maybe too well.
=+=
Hands are covering his eyes. It takes a lot of Sungmin's self control to not feel trapped, to laugh in delight instead as Siwon carefully leads him up staircase.
"We're almost there." Siwon assures.
"Usually I take exception to people kidnapping me and leading me to strange places, but I'll make an exception for you."
Siwon laughs, unaware of how true Sungmin's words are. "You'll enjoy it. I promise."
Sungmin reaches behind him, places a palm over Siwon's crotch. "I'm enjoying it already."
"There will be time for that later." Siwon says, pulling Sungmin's hand away. "But surprise first."
"I don't know, that thing in your pants is really surprising. Wonderfully surprising, of course."
"You're shameless."
Sungmin hears the sound of a door opening and the rush of cool air against his skin as Siwon carefully leads him outside. He can hear the sound of the city; cars driving, people living. He doesn't need Siwon to remove his hand to know where they are. The roof of Siwon's apartment building had an incredible view of Seoul.
Sungmin once escaped to the roof to try and think, to figure out what he was doing. Of course Siwon had found him, but instead of trying to fill the silence with needless small talk, Siwon had remained perfectly quiet.
It's something Sungmin still appreciates.
Sungmin isn't sure why Siwon would take them up there again. It's all made clear when Siwon pulls his hand away, and Sungmin notices a small round table, set for two with the finest china plates and crystal glasses.
It's cheesy and so typically Siwon that Sungmin has to laugh at it.
"Do you like it?" The hope in his voice squeezes at Sungmin's heart.
"I do." Sungmin steps towards the table, from the corner of his eye he can see Seoul bathed in the red, gold and orange light of a setting sun. "It's a surprise, though."
Siwon pushes the metal door closed behind him. "I wanted to celebrate the fact that we've known each other for a month."
"What? Like a month-aversary?" Sungmin teases.
"Something like that." Siwon replies, grinning. "Sungmin," He steps close, folds his hands around Sungmin's, "I know it hasn't been long and I don't really know where this is going, but I like spending time with you. I like having you in my life, and I don't want you to look so sad anymore."
The last bit takes Sungmin by surprise. He wants to laugh it, play the ignorant card, but Siwon won't let him. The look in Siwon's eyes tells Sungmin he'll be able to see through any kind of lie Sungmin could come up with, and it's too much. Sungmin pushes himself into Siwon's arms and leans his forehead against Siwon's shoulder. As always, Siwon doesn't hesitate to hold him close.
=+=
Spending the night with Siwon feels like a bad idea. Siwon is disappointed, of course, and Sungmin tells himself he's not taken by the looks Siwon gives him. He needs time to reflect on the situation without Siwon influencing what he thinks or how he views the steady progression of his plan.
When he gets home, Sungmin actually feels like he can breathe again. It's too late for Yu-ni to greet him, and Sungmin feels a moment of regret. He hasn't been able to spend as much time with her as he usually would, giving too much of himself to his plan, and it makes him feel awful, but when this is done, his soul can rest and he'll give everything to Yu-ni to make it up to her.
Maybe when Youngwoon has what he wants, he'll consider letting Sungmin give up his role as the company's attack dog.
Sungmin's taken the first step up the staircase when he hears two voices in the sitting room. He recognizes Youngwoon's easily enough, and it doesn't take him long to realize the other voice belongs to Jongwoon.
Jongwoon hasn't left the country yet, which in itself is a little strange. The man always seems so desperate to get out of Seoul, but now Jongwoon seems content to stay. Whatever demons were always nipping at his heels, chasing him away, seem to have taken a break.
"I'm still pissed you didn't come to my wedding." Sungmin hears Youngwoon say.
"I couldn't stand to watch you get married to someone else." Jongwoon replies. "You should know that."
"Rich coming from the person who walked out on me."
Any hope of just moving on and letting them have their private conversation flies out the window. Sungmin, slowly and carefully, nears the room where they are and just listens. He doesn't try to peek into the room; there's always too much of a chance that they'll see him and then he won't hear the things he's been dying to know.
"Just because I left doesn't mean I didn't love you." Jongwoon actually sounds a little annoyed. "Besides, you already had Sungmin's broken heart to deal with, you didn't need mine."
The mention of his name surprises Sungmin.
"Hn."
"Speaking of which, do you regret it yet?"
"Regret what? My marriage?"
"No, you idiot. I mean Sungmin... do you regret it yet?"
Sungmin has no idea what it could be. There are too many things Jongwoon could be referring to, but Sungmin doesn't like Jongwoon's tone of voice, or any of the things he could be talking about.
"No." Youngwoon says and Sungmin isn't sure if it's the answer he wanted. Sungmin doesn't know which answer would have been the ideal one. Then there's a sigh and a, "Maybe... sometimes."
Sungmin's had enough. Youngwoon's voice, the little hint of regret, hurts and cuts into Sungmin like a hot knife. Youngwoon, despite how far they've fallen, or the distance that has wedged itself between them, is still the love of Sungmin's life and if Youngwoon regrets them in any kind of way, like it seems he does, then it would be a blow Sungmin's not sure he'll survive.
Escaping to his bedroom is the only way Sungmin can keep his sanity.
When he's showered and doesn't smell like Siwon anymore, Sungmin goes and checks on Yu-ni. She's fast asleep and not even Sungmin kissing her forehead wakes her up. He wishes he could sleep as she does, so peacefully without any kind of worry tainting her dreams. He'll make sure she won't ever go through what he did. Her childhood will not be taken from her as his was taken from him.
Back in his own room, Sungmin thinks about the plan.
Siwon is falling and he's falling fast, and Sungmin needs to get what Youngwoon wants before that flame of passion fades. The next part of Sungmin's plan is going to require careful planning and will be too easy to mess up if it's not done correctly. Hyukjae's already expressed worry over what exactly Sungmin intends to do, but then Hyukjae hates any part of what Sungmin's doing so Sungmin doesn't think too much about what Hyukjae's opinion is.
An hour or so later, there's a knock on his door. Sungmin says nothing, he knows Youngwoon will come in whether he gives permission or not.
"I'm surprised you're home." Youngwoon comments as he steps inside. Sungmin still remains stubbornly silent. "Are you mad at me?"
"Why would I be mad at you?" Sungmin asks, finally breaking his silence.
"You've been very mad lately." Youngwoon sits down on the bed.
"Are you really surprised?"
"No." Youngwoon trails his fingers over Sungmin's cheek, down his jaw and neck and pauses at his shoulder. "I don't like how long you're taking getting what I need. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you enjoy Siwon's company." There's a pause and Youngwoon laughs lightly. "Good thing I know better."
When Youngwoon tries to kiss him, Sungmin turns his face away. They haven't been intimate in weeks. Youngwoon's too busy with Jongwoon and whoever else he can find, and Sungmin's too busy with Siwon. He never thought the day would come, but the idea of Youngwoon touching him, fucking him, disgusts him to the point where he almost feels ill.
It's frightening to feel this way. For so long he's yearned for Youngwoon in a way that was almost obsessive, and to be freed of that longing to always be with Youngwoon is both a relief and overwhelming.
Youngwoon pulls away with a frown. "You're taking too long. Get me results."
Sungmin nods. When Youngwoon leaves without another word, Sungmin flops onto his back and stares at the ceiling. Youngwoon's right, he is taking too long. It's time to move things along.
He isn't sure why it leaves him feeling so terrible.
=+=
"You're insane." Hyukjae says.
Donghae is nodding and looks a little worried.
Even Kyuhyun seems unsure.
Sungmin doesn't care. "Do it." He says, nodding to Kyuhyun.
"If you're sure." Kyuhyun murmurs and reluctantly pushes the enter key on his laptop's keyboard.
When a message saying, "Sent!" flashes on Kyuhyun's screen, Sungmin feels the beginning of uncertainty. Convincing himself he did the right thing is no longer as easy as it was just a few minutes ago.
"This isn't going to work." Hyukjae has never sounded so afraid before. "They're going to kill you. Siwon won't stop them - when he finds out who you are, who you work for, he'll want them to kill you."
"Siwon is in love with me." Sungmin replies. "He'll intervene. He's too much of a nice guy not to." Saying it makes Sungmin feel terrible, because it's so true. Siwon is too nice to be stuck in the family he's in; the world of scheming and backstabbing and murdering.
"And if he doesn't?" This time it's Donghae who voices the uncertainty everyone is feeling.
Sungmin shrugs, trying not to look as nervous as he feels. "Then I guess I die."
"Fuck this shit." Hyukjae growls and storms from the room. Donghae follows.
Sungmin sighs.
=+=
The second part of the plan is simple, really. It involves Sungmin doing something he would never do - exposing himself.
All it takes is one simple push of a button on Kyuhyun's laptop and everything about Sungmin, who he is, what he does for Kim Youngwoon, and his recent dalliance with Siwon, is sent to Choi Kiho.
Hyukjae's right, it really is risky. Siwon will find out, will realize he's been played and will, of course, be hurt. Sungmin will be captured and, well, what happens next will then depend on Siwon and how deep his feelings for Sungmin go.
It's not a kind of move Sungmin would ever consider under normal circumstances, but this plan has always been a little desperate and has always required more cunning than any other kind of job Sungmin has ever been on. It's required more of him as a person.
He's needed to give more of himself than ever before. When he has his revenge, when the Choi family is broken, as broken as he's been since the day his parents were murdered while he hid underneath a stupid little bed, powerless to help them, then it will all be worth it.
First, his gamble needs to pay off.
The evening starts off well enough. Siwon is all smiles and sweet kisses when he and Sungmin head out for dinner. Sungmin makes sure not to let his apprehension show - he must do a good enough job because Siwon doesn't seem to pick up on anything being wrong. Sungmin isn't so sure why he's still so surprised; he's turned out to be a better liar than he could ever have imagined.
During dinner at quite a fancy restaurant, Siwon finally notices something is amiss when he recognizes that they've been followed by a few of his father's men. Of course he thinks they're there for him, that his father has found out about his newest relationship and wants an eye kept on him so he doesn't do anything to embarrass the family.
Siwon's whole mood changes. He hasn't spoken of Kiho very often, or his relationship with his family, but Sungmin has picked up on how caged Siwon feels by his father's high expectations.
"Let's go." Siwon says, fishing money out of his wallet and throwing it on the table. It's far too much, they've only ordered drinks so far, but Siwon has his arm in a grip and is leading him out of the restaurant before Sungmin can comment.
"Siwon." Sungmin says as the taller man pulls him down the street. Siwon's car is in the opposite direction. Sungmin has no idea what he's thinking of doing - even Siwon should know they can't outrun them. "What's going on?"
"My father doesn't know how to mind his own business." Siwon looks over his shoulder, Sungmin does the same and sure enough, Kiho's men are hot on their heels. "Seems some of his men have been keeping an eye on us throughout the whole evening. I should have realized it sooner. I'm sorry."
"Don't say sorry." Sungmin replies.
"Usually my father's happy to leave me alone as long as I don't do anything that could embarrass him. He must have realized my feelings for you aren't going to go away any time soon and now he feels he needs to watch me. It's ridiculous."
Siwon leads them through a few back alleys. Sungmin still isn't sure why they didn't just go to Siwon's car and when he asks, Siwon's response is, "there's a tracker in my car. We'll never get rid of them and I really don't want to deal with them tonight. I'll have someone pick up the car tomorrow."
Siwon doesn't get his wish. His father's men already know all his tricks, and Sungmin and Siwon walk straight into a trap. When Siwon heads into a new alley, he stops, swears under his breath when he sees two men, obviously his father's, waiting for them at the end of the alley. Behind them they can hear the sound of those following them coming closer.
"Siwon-nim." One says, bowing respectfully and Sungmin assumes he's the leader. "Please take a step away from your companion."
"What's going on, Kibum? Why are you following me? What does my father want now?"
Kibum's eyes flicker towards Sungmin. "Please step away from him, Sir."
"Why should I?"
"Because he works for Kim Youngwoon and I can't guarantee your safety while you're so close to a trained killer."
"What?" Siwon actually laughs. "That's absurd. Sungmin isn't..." He looks at Sungmin and the brief amusement fades when he sees the look on Sungmin's face. "Tell me they're lying." Siwon begs, actually begs and it's heartbreaking seeing the devastation on his face when he realizes the last month has been a lie; that he'd been played. "Tell me they're lying!" Sungmin winces. It hurts, which is something Sungmin never expected, and he actually feels so damn awful as he stares at the person he's betrayed.
"Siwon, I can explain--," Sungmin tries to touch Siwon, but Siwon pulls his arm away and finally steps back.
"I don't want you to explain." Siwon squeezes his eyes shut, buries his hands in his hair as he tries to process everything. "It's all been a lie. Everything. From the first..."
"Siwon, please." Sungmin is surprised by how distressed he sounds. How sore his heart is, is equally as surprising.
"Save it." Siwon's eyes are open again and the sweetness that's always been there is gone. For the first time he looks like Sungmin always imagined a son of Choi Kiho would look like; cold, unfeeling. Like the person he's looking at isn't worth his time. "Take him. Do what you want." Siwon says and walks away.
Kibum gives his men a curt nod before following Siwon.
Sungmin could fight them off, he supposes, but he knows a lost battle when sees one and he's come too far to give up on Siwon now.
That and he'll need all the strength he has to face what's coming.
=+=
A splash of icy cold water pulls Sungmin out of unconsciousness. He splutters and it feels like he's drowning, but the hand grabbing his sopping hair and pulling it back, so that he can look his torturer in the eye. It's difficult - the light in the room is very dim and his one eye is already swollen shut from the beating he took earlier.
He can taste blood on his tongue - his lip is stinging, and he knows it's been split. Sungmin's whole face is aching, his head is pounding, and Sungmin lost track of time hours ago, just before he lost consciousness the first time.
"Wake up, sleeping beauty." The man whispers in his ear. "I have more questions for you."
Sungmin keeps quiet. He hasn't given his torturer the satisfaction of hearing him whimper, not while conscious anyway, and he has no plans to start now.
"Ease up, Woojin." A voice nearby says, and when Woojin pulls away, Sungmin can sort of make out the figure of the other person in charge of extracting information from him.
"I'm going to ask you again: what does Kim Youngwoon want?"
Sungmin spits out some of the blood in his mouth and laughs as he says, "he already has what he wants."
"Which is?"
"Your mother spreading her legs for him every night."
The blow Woojin's friend deals him echoes through the room. Sungmin isn't sure, it's difficult to think, but he imagines he heard something cracking.
Ignoring the pain in his cheek, both inside and out, or the way his brain is screaming at him is an almost impossible task. The blow reminded him of the way his arms burn, being pulled back behind him with his wrists tied closely together. The metal of the cuffs are cutting into his skin. He can feel the tickling sensation that comes along with thin blood trails running down his hands and dripping down his fingers.
Unfortunately, Sungmin can't keep himself from gasping when Woojin's friend wraps a hand around his throat and squeezes.
"Stupid move." He hisses, his face close enough that Sungmin can feel the man's warm, moist breath against his skin. "I can make your last moments hell so that you'll be begging me to end your life."
It's a typical threat. Even if it's true, which Sungmin supposes it is, it's so boring that there's no way Sungmin can take him seriously. Showing his contempt the only way he can, Sungmin spits in his face. The next blow is harder, and the next even worse than that. Eventually Woojin has to stop his friend from going too far.
"Calm down, Hyunwoo."
"Fucking bitch." Hyunwoo growls while wiping his cheek clean with his jacket's sleeve.
Sungmin grins up at him, flashing his bloody teeth.
The torture session lasts for another hour. Midway Sungmin passes out again and is woken up like all the times before - with icy water splashed all over him. He's sopping wet, shivering from the cold air of the room he's in and the icy water dripping from his skin. It takes him a little longer to fully regain consciousness this time, but when he does Sungmin almost regrets it.
Hyunwoo is holding a pair of pliers with a wicked grin on his face. Woojin is next to him, looking just as excited, just as twisted and happy, as his friend.
"We're going to start by pulling your nails out - one by one." Hyunwoo says.
"Your pretty face looks like shit, but we don't want to break it completely." Woojin adds.
"Not yet." Hyunwoo chuckles and Woojin nods.
"When we're done with your pretty little nails, we'll start by cutting those fingers off, and then we'll move onto your hands. We're going to dice you up, pretty boy. Kim Youngwoon won't even recognize you when we're done."
Hyunwoo cackles. "And, you know what? We don't even care if you start spilling your guts. We're going to make you scream and--,"
Hyunwoo's dramatic little speech is cut off by a knock on the door. Hyunwoo groans, Woojin sighs and moves to open the door. The person on the other side is obviously not someone he ever expected, because he stumbles back before bowing. As he does, the person on the other side of the door pushes it fully open and steps inside.
If Siwon is shocked by Sungmin's less than stellar appearance, he doesn't show it.
"S-sir." Hyunwoo stammers. "You really shouldn't be here. Your father--,"
"Shut up." Siwon says and Hyunwoo falls silent immediately. Woojin winces. "Take a break. I need to talk to him."
"But--," Hyunwoo tries again, but quickly swallows the rest of his sentence when Siwon levels him with a glare.
"I said take a break. Come back in an hour. I just need a few answers he won't give anyone except me."
The uncertainty in both Hyunwoo and Woojin isn't going away, but they know putting up a fight is a bad idea. Leaving could be a bad idea, too, especially if their boss finds out about it, but the only Choi in the room right now is Siwon and his threat is more immediate.
Siwon flips the door's lock when the door closes behind them. He sends a glance Sungmin's way, and finally has some sort of reaction regarding Sungmin's beaten and bruised appearance.
"I want you to tell me the truth." Siwon says and Sungmin nods. "So you knew exactly who I was that first time we met?"
"Yes." Sungmin replies. His voice is a little broken and speaking hurts like hell. Every time his lips move, his bruised and bloodied face flares with pain.
"Why? What were you supposed to do?"
"Get close to you. Find out as much about your family as I could."
"You haven't been doing a very good job. You haven't asked me any questions. You barely seemed interested in my family at all."
Sungmin remains quiet, not sure how to say what he needs to say.
"Sungmin..."
"I got caught up in the lie and I didn't know how to get out. I didn't want to get out because..."
"Because?"
"Because I fell in love with you."
It's all part of the plan, Sungmin knows that, but the words come a little too easily. It's a blow when he realizes he actually means it - he has fallen in love with Siwon and knowing nothing can come from it is a bitter pill to swallow.
"How do I know you're not lying?" Siwon looks so hopeful. A little too afraid to believe, but still so eager to.
Sungmin chuckles without any kind of humor. The broken little hitch of his breath, the sob, are all too real. It's okay - despite how humiliated Sungmin feels, the truth will be easier to sell than a lie.
"Okay." Siwon nods. Then he grabs something from the nearby table, the keys to Sungmin's cuffs, and moves to free Sungmin.
"What are you doing?" Sungmin asks.
"Getting you out of here."
"Siwon, wait, you can't--,"
Siwon peeks up at him. "I happen to be in love with you, too, so I can't just sit back and wait for them to kill you. Which they will."
"They'll know you helped me escape."
"Don't worry, I have plan for that."
Being able to move his arms again is a relief. As he thought, his wrists look terrible, rubbed raw and bleeding and with thin little cuts marring smooth skin. Siwon looks terribly guilty, running his fingers over the bruises as gently as he can and sighing when Sungmin inhales sharply.
Sungmin can't really stand on his own. When he gets up, there's a hot flare of pain and Sungmin almost falls, but Siwon catches him with an arm around his waist.
"I'm sorry." Siwon whispers. "I should have stopped them sooner, but I was... angry."
Sungmin turns his head and leans his forehead against Siwon's jaw. "It's not your fault."
Siwon half carries, half drags Sungmin out of that room. He knows exactly how to avoid the people roaming around, probably having studied the patrols before deciding to get Sungmin out of there.
"We're in an apartment building my father owns. One in a... bad part of town." Siwon whispers, leading him to a back door.
The back alley Siwon leads him to has a lone guard in it, but Siwon manages to take care of him easily enough while Sungmin waits in the dark. Siwon returns holding something in his hand. "Your cell phone," he explains, "who do I call?"
"Hyukjae." Sungmin says without hesitation.
Siwon makes the call. While Siwon talks to Hyukjae, Sungmin finds himself slipping in an out of consciousness as his body steadily gives in to the pain. Siwon left him leaning against the brick wall, but when he wakes up he's sitting on the ground with Siwon kneeling next to him.
"Hyukjae is on his way, but we move on a bit before they find us. I kept the door of the room you were in locked, so hopefully they won't realize what's going on."
"Any..." Sungmin groans a bit as Siwon lifts him to his feet. "Any smart person will realize what's going on."
"They're not that smart, don't worry."
"I noticed." Sungmin chuckles, sparing a thought for his two moronic torturers.
They don't go too far. Sungmin still can't walk very well, not with the pain in his leg or his mind spinning as much as it is, and Siwon can't really carry him without drawing too much unwanted attention. They come to a stop in an alley a few buildings away from the one Sungmin had been trapped in for a few hours.
"I'm going to need your friend's help." Siwon says as they wait for Hyukjae to arrive.
"With?" Sungmin can't remember the last time he was this tired. It's difficult not to slip into sweet blackness.
"With making it look like you escaped instead of me helping you. I need your friend to beat me up a little."
"I have a feeling Hyukjae won't mind helping you out."
Hyukjae arrives twenty minutes later. He's got Donghae with him and the betrayed look Siwon gives Sungmin when he recognizes Donghae has Sungmin wincing and murmuring an apology.
"Don't be." Siwon says, but he still looks upset. "It's done."
He doesn't stay too mad, though. Despite their rather violent first meeting, Donghae has Siwon taken aback and maybe a little charmed with a disarmingly bright smile. The smile on Donghae's face does fade away, however, when he finally notices Sungmin.
The last thing Sungmin sees is both Hyukjae and Donghae crowding around him.
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