What is this audacity that leads me to believe I could be a worthy writer without a platform of education? I have a sophomoric mastery of language, at best. I do not read at all. Those whom I envy and admire have been eating books for the better part of two decades. I can count the books I have read on two fucking hands. It is disrespectful - ( Read more... )

I am a shitty, shitty writer. It's painful to be so mediocre at something that feels like such an awful necessity.

I would really hate to think people judge me by my journal. I'm a pretty easy person to get along with, I smile bright for the pretty cameras.

When I was young, I had a self-injury problem that nearly got me killed. I used to cut my stomach, so no one would find out. One day I accidentally severed a vein. I bled for two days, without stop. Finally, I passed out. My parents took me to the hospital, and I got stitched up ( Read more... )

I don't know if you still read my journal. It would be audacious of me, to think you still think of me. I can't reach you, your phone number is no longer yours. You have a tendency to change your email accounts on a regular basis, and I have no idea where you live anymore ( Read more... )

The intricacy of human emotions and interpersonal relationships are simply astounding. Feelings motivate everything any human ever does... and love which seems an omnipresent entity is such a driving force in every single life. I marvel at emotions. I'm in awe and wonder over relationships and the nuances of communication. The impact of one human ( Read more... )

Wow, after reading some of my posts to this journal over the last few months.... I've decided, I need to get out of my head more. Less thinking, more being.

Ugh, when do I stop hating myself... like... seriously? When?

At work, I work at being a different person. I am very conscious of my bad words and bad behaviours. I think before I speak, and I worry how I am perceived. At work, I practice being a better person ( Read more... )

I feel, at work, I am too honest with my personality. I have a lot of... quirks... shall we say? And they may be inappropriate for the workplace. I don't have a very good grasp on self-censorship, though. I need to learn to filter my thoughts and feelings and be a more neutral, thus palatable individual. Bland is better than abrasive.