well.. clay and i kinda broke it off--for a day. i couldn't stand to be away from him and i know it killed him to be away from me and our daughter. i think being away for that day made me realize that i really love that kid. (clayton, i mean). and, our wedding is approaching very fast! it's only 3 1/2 months away, if that. i think i'm going to just ( Read more... )

so i just watched the butterfly effect-- awesome movie!! i really thought that it would suck, but it was pretty cool ( Read more... )

i forgot to mention in my earlier post (of like two minutes ago ( Read more... )

i dont even know why i'm upset today. well, i guess i kinda do, but i'm not sure how it started. today clay and i went shopping for a wedding present for a friend of mine and we were going to eat at wendy's (which would have costed a whoppin five dollars for both of us to eat), and clayton started freaking out about money (which we're fine with) ( Read more... )

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

k, i feel better.

i want a divorce--and i'm not even married. gosh, i know he's tired, he worked all day at a shitty job (the shitty part is his fault- he could have gotten another job by now. he's told me of several jobs that he "shoulda applied for" at DG, and never did, so who's fuckin fault is that?). but you know what? how many times have i actually shyed away ( Read more... )

i've been doing some thinking today. i was mostly thinking about how i'm going ot try my damndest to raise madison without fucking her up too bad. I think that life is just a big vicious circle that doesnt mean a damn thing. what could life possibly mean? it's almost pointless. you start out little, try to learn everything that interests you, try ( Read more... )

Well, i haven't really heard from my brother lately. i kinda wish my parents would tell me when he writes them, because i worry a lot now. i sent him his birthday present and everything (late), and i've mailed him a letter since then. i think i'm gonna write him again today. i'll probably just type it because NOBODY'S IN THE COMPUTER LAB (MEGAN!), ( Read more... )

i'm not sure why i like hanging out where i usually do in the evenings. no one ever pays attention to me and the *one friend* that i do have, is hardly ever here anymore. even then, she doesn't always pay attention. for some reason, i always have fond memories of hanging out here. i hate being lonely. retarded computer games are no longer fun. ( Read more... )

1. Who are you ( Read more... )