Three possibilities

Oct 21, 2010 16:28

Three possibilities:

1) I just have bad luck with neighbors,

2) There are just so many inconsiderate people out there that the odds are actually more likely for a dick to move in next door.

3) I overreact to offenses that aren't really so bad, and that I'm the unreasonable one ( Read more... )

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Comments 7

prokrstn8r October 22 2010, 01:44:46 UTC
The fact of the matter, in my experience, is that most people are really inconsiderate slugs. I have problems with neighbors in almost every place I've lived, and it's really confusing to me, because I am extremely conscientious of what I'm doing and how the things I'm doing may affect my neighbors, pretty much at all times, and it seems like most other people aren't like that.

Luckily you have more protections right now, due to the fact that pot is illegal. If the owner of the building does not evict him, the owner can go to jail because there are illegal drugs on the property.

It sounds, though, that talking to his mother would be the best course of action. I've found that talking to people about things NEVER works. Never. Asking someone politely to change a behavior or be considerate has never resulted in any change.

I konw you don't want to be a jerk, but definitely the mom or the landlord or the police would be the way to go on this one.

Good luck.

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boymaenad October 22 2010, 19:24:03 UTC
I completely disagree with K. I think the idea that you're the neighbor who stops your neighbors from quietly doing what they would ordinarily get away with within their own rented boundaries (and even goes through the stalkerish approach of telling their MOM on them, thus becoming a story of major psycho douchebaggery and making the entire rest of your shared building time awkward and horrifying, and risking possible retaliation by the victim OR the victim's crazy friends) is pretty disturbing and I wouldn't feel right with it if I were you, even though there might be some kind of sly satisfaction in the moment. I would look for practical solutions that you could work out mutually. if you've already exhausted all of these, then I can imagine going further ( ... )

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blood_thunder October 26 2010, 02:15:11 UTC
I second this.

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eidothea October 23 2010, 00:00:10 UTC
I think Joseph has a lot of good ideas for an amicable compromise.

I have similar negative reactions to pot smoke; ironic after all my years of smoking. Anyway, when I have friends over who would like to smoke, I offer them my bathroom...after I pee of course!

Good luck with your neighbor. I feel for you. If I wash dishes after midnite, my neighbor bangs on my wall or calls security. My kitchen shares a wall with his bedroom.

Of course your neighbor could just be an asshole who won't consider a reasonable compromise. If that's the case, yeah, I'd speak to the manager and/or the property owner, and use his mom as a last resort.

Good luck!

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POTHEAD TRICK! lilium_vitiate October 23 2010, 07:27:00 UTC
Taking Joseph's route: teach him this simple stoner trick, and solve your problems. Fo'sheezy.

Take an empty toilet paper roll. Stuff with one or two dryer sheets. Exhale smoke through toilet paper roll, every exhale. Smoke smells vanish and smell like laundry instead!

It's called a contemplator. If he's set on smoking indoors, this will help keep you safe from his smoke, and him safe from his mom. He should make a new one every week or so. Hopefully he's a reasonable dude. But seriously, who doesn't at least burn some incense when smoking indoors??

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ebreyman October 24 2010, 06:07:52 UTC
Going to the landlord or his mother would be insane and would, I think, tempt fate to bring you a much worse neighbor.

You act like asking him to give up potsmoking is a reasonable request, when it is not. It would not be reasonable for your neighbor to knock on your door and ask you to give up alcohol, or Coca Cola, or anything else you do several times a week. Imagine if he had hypersensitive ears and told you to stop masturbating in your apartment because of his unusual physical condition. Your request sounds THAT crazy to him!

So basically, by coming to him and even suggesting the possibility of him not smoking pot in his own apartment, you appear to him as an extremist who is not worth talking with. If you approach him without that being a goal you can almost certainly find a compromise - Joseph listed a bunch.

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