you were born with tragedy in your blood ( Read more... )

i'm not going to say i'm .sorry. to you who have commented on this, but i find it very unfortunate that all of you have gotten yourselves so worked up about it all. i do want to appologize to rebecca and quinn though, neither of you even crossed my mind when i was writing this. it had nothing to do with chris, or any of his friends, especially not ( Read more... )

"my friends are the beatles" and yours eat rocks and roll on to the next place to fish for arti-fish-al love and dreams and sanity, to be happy for a split second. my friends are happiness, my friends are life. yours are searching for it, trying to learn how to eat it out of someone else's eyes while the sky is still falling from the top of their ( Read more... )

. i dont know which parts are real until you peel my skin away at night and kiss the tendrils of my soul with those sunshine lime lips that penetrate through all my worst fears and tears and clear my head for another blow of wind, gust of your breath hot and lovely on my neck, with the best intentions held high in your mind, with the best of ( Read more... )

very suddenly i feel like my heart might explode, im so overcome and overwhelmed by and with emotion and im not sure why. the herb and the book seem to have set it off, but its not about that. im so fucking in love with him. i think it just hit that part that squeezes the shit out of my heart and brings it very near the end and then kicks it back ( Read more... )

i cough and my insides come out. an insideout esauphagus with a tiny shriveled bubble of a stomache sewn to the end with red tape and ticker tape and caution tape and caution please take me away and give me new breath because this one is contaminated, this one has to be taken through a white quarentine cloth so the car wont fill with my illness. ( Read more... )

im so tired. ive been fucking everything up so that this one thing will be perfect, and i cannot honestly say i would have wanted this any other way, and i honestly cannot say that things wont be better in a day. i know ive never had it this good, and i know ive never been loved like i should, and everythings coming up daiseys and love, and im in ( Read more... )

how do i respond to that? all i can think is that i miss you and love you and miss you and love you and all i want to do is drop everything and fly home and be with you because you're the only reason im still here and the only reason i ever learned to believe in people and friendship and love and EXISTENCE at all and even if we both had died that ( Read more... )

you didnt listen to me, i didnt say it like that. not at all. and even if in some small way my words didnt convey the exact feelings i had, if you had been paying attention like you used to there's no way you could have missed what i meant. unless you never understood in the first place. unless i was completely wrong about our relationship and our ( Read more... )

i think things are going to be ok for a while now. i know "happiness is shallow" and that "if you're not fighting you're not trying" but i really just want to relax and not focus of the ills of my existence and trying to fix them. i just want to let everything run its own course right now, let the dust settle. i burned up a lot of metaphysical ( Read more... )