this is my last entry in this journal i made a new one so if u want to see it just go to http://www.livejournal.com/users/thedirtyrican12/

When I say I love you I do
But this with you will not do
I need someone I can lean on
Someone I can count on too

Yes you are there sometimes
For that I am grateful to you
But I need someone there full time
And that you can not do

You told me once you loved me
That I could believe in you
I was there when you needed someone
Where were you when I needed someone ( Read more... )

It's becoming more evident
Much more obvious to me
I thought much more of you
Than you ever thought of me

Was this my biggest mistake
Letting myself think you cared
Was I just your marionette
With heartstrings open and bared?

With me left here still thinking
What was false, what was true
So puzzling and so complex
I’m left to await another clue

On my ( Read more... )

Sadness

Am I to be happy?
I dwell so deep within myself
that I have never seen the light of day.

The past never happened,
the future will never come,
and the present isn't real.

Depression is a part of everyday life.
The birds chirp for someone else,
The day warms the lives of everyone,
but me.

Happiness lies near,
but my mind won't let my heart reach for it,
( Read more... )

Shattered Pieces

Inside my sleeve, I pull out my heart,
handing it to you, "careful it's fragile,
and easily falls apart."

Extending your arms, you take the heart in
your tender warm hands.
It falls into a million shattered pieces - on
the floor it lands.

You begin to bend down to pick it up, sorrow and
sadness in your eyes.

Apologies are not enough.

Looking ( Read more... )

I Was Reminded

As we lay there quiet
I was reminded of all the reasons why I lust you
Your smile,
and the way it teased at me seductively
Your laugh,
and the way it tempted me
Your eyes,
and the way they seem to hypnotize me
As we sat there silent
I was reminded of all the reasons why I love you
Your smile,
and the way it brings such life into me
Your laugh,
( Read more... )

ocean waves
wash my soul
cleanse me of your smile

and the memory of
ten fingers
entwined forever
in a hopeless wish

Entrapment

Hopelessly bound
unfettered
by the chains of love's grip
- greatest gift,
fate's cruelest curse.

Wherefore do I weep
at knowing the joy,
the warmth,
at feeling the peace,
the fire.

Wherefore do I weep
unable to complete ,
to be,
unknown the kiss,
the flames.

Wherefore do I weep
at loving not living
seeing not touching
breathing not sharing
holding not ( Read more... )

hey everyone! school is alot of fun and not as hard as i thought it would be, honestly though it would be alot easier if fawn wasn't there just becuase she's still not over everything. i haven't said a word to her and like she's still talking shit abotu me. i'm just trying to move on and be happy for her but she doesn't seem to get the idea that i ( Read more... )

MOMENTS IN LIFE

There are moments in life when you miss someone
so much that you just want to pick them from
your dreams and hug them for real!

When the door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often times we look so long at the
closed door that we don't see the one,
which has been opened for us.

Don't go for looks; they can deceive.
Don't go for wealth ( Read more... )