Dealing with criticism

[boshvark]

I haven't made a whole lot of personal posts lately, but this one is a little more personal than usual

Comments

[jalapic]

you've contributed far more than nearly anybody to the development of tournament scrabble. most of us would be nowhere near as proficient as we are now without your program. And most importantly, your program has and shall continue to, provide us all with hours of endless enjoyment.

thanks is all I have to say!

I really must buy a cell phone soon though...

[boshvark]

Thanks! It's my pleasure to do it. :-)

[evwhore]

Screw her. Haters gonna hate.

[boshvark]

See, this is the kind of reaction I wish I could stick with. Instead I tend to overanalyze.

[redessence]

Something to keep in mind with user-submitted reviews and feedback in general is that people are more likely to write about things they don't like and want to change than mere 'well done' type feedback. Teacher evaluations are similar; I know this both as a current university student and as a TA.

Another thing to consider: if you're not being criticized or you don't have haters, you're probably shooting too low with whatever you're doing in life in general. Accept criticism as a sign that you're creating change, which people are naturally resistant to.

[boshvark]

These are great points, and I'm going to keep them in mind going forward. Thank you!

[quinquennia]

Echo Jesse. I rarely hear a peep if I do a good drawing, but I feel like I get shat on every time I get a revision for handing in something somebody doesn't like. Worse, the people who dish out the revisions probably couldn't draw a good stick man. There are days I want to contact the people who send me bullshit revisions and tell them to draw the revisions themselves - I'm going for a beer. It's especially awful if you're making something extra beyond your regular work day, and someone cuts it up. Don't worry about it. I think everyone here knows how much you've contributed to Scrabble in general. Keep up the good work. Waiting for the Zyzzyva Heavy app, with the quiz features.

[qaqaq]

Although I generally don't care what other people think of me (as long as I think I'm acting correctly), I've learned never to read the crossword blogs to see reviews of my work. Even if 99 people out of 100 loved a puzzle, I will obsess about the one person who hated it, even if their reasoning is in error (not understanding the theme, etc).

Life is better when I just do my best work and hope that people enjoy what I do.

[boshvark]

I totally hear you. I do this, too. I'm a people pleaser and I try to make everyone happy... which I now remember Bill Cosby said is the key to failure. All I can do is my best, and I'm going to keep it up.

[jmallick]

I will admit that my sensitivity to criticism is what ultimately led me to retire (for now) from directing tournaments. Even though almost nothing went wrong during the three tournaments I directed, I always took blame personally when someone wasn't pleased about something. I knew that came with the territory going in, but I just felt the need to direct at least once after being the directee for this many years.

This reminds me of a Marge Simpson quote: "Anyone who beats you up for wearing a shirt isn't your friend." Thank goodness she was talking to Bart.

[boshvark]

I do that, too, and I'm trying to get better at not doing it. I know it's not my job to please everyone, but I still feel like I've failed when I don't.