Despite how clever I am, or at least pretend to be, I'm actually pretty dumb. There're too many graduates and not enough skilled manual workers.

I should have been a plumber. Make more money and get to nick shit from snotty people when they pop to the shops.

I'm so sick of this fucking dissertation.

Unless you can tell me why these:
☺☻☼♀♂♠♣♥♦
Are FUCKING RETARDED you shouldn't be allowed to use the web.

Pricks.

As soon as it's realised the only way to stop people 'ripping off' Mrs. Speares, Mr. Ulrich, Mr. Ritchie, Mr. Eisner and (Everyone's favourite billionaire antipodean stormtrooper of death) Mr. Murdoch is to have a Copyright enforcement officer sitting in our living rooms with a gun and a big hammer I'm going to invest in a disused missile silo and ( Read more... )

During the course of my research I've ended up reading up on Charles Babbage. Just so you know, he was the Victorian scientist who invented the stored program computer. He also discovered a method of breaking the Vernier cipher, which had remained uncracked for two hundred years and is the main reason I''ve been reading up on the fucker ( Read more... )

Jam. I meant to say "Jam it up your arse"

You can all stick it up your arses.

It's seven days to hand in, I've got one sweet ass, a shit load of tobacco, it's dark and I'm listening to Megadeth.

Some people might question the logic of waiting until there's only a week remaining to begin their fifty page dissertation.

These people don't realise they've been hustled.

Rocky IV is also the best film ever made. Ivan Drago was brought up on a diet of American lies and spent his formative years kicking Reagan in the nuts.

The best thing about him was that he emerged from the womb the fully formed Superman that beat Apollo Creed to death. As seen here.


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Wikipedia is teh dead.

What a sack of shite. I need to use the bloody thing as well.

Muriel Spark is dead.

Good. I hope it hurt.