Do I deserve to be happy?

I don't think so. . .

Tim and I just celebrated our 8 month anniversary last Fri.  Who knew this could happen to me ( Read more... )

It's been over 6 months.  We've lasted this long.  I will be honest, though, we broke up last weekend.  OMG it was such a horrible couple of hours.  I cried so hard.  I had no clue that he meant so much to me.  I'll explain the situation.

I had been up for over 40 hours because I was studying for an exam and I was so tired.  So Friday night I went ( Read more... )

I don't know what my problem is.  I was doing fine today until about 2:00.  Then I started getting all upset and thinking about shit that I shouldn't be thinking.  I really wish they weren't fucking around with my meds.  One good thing that happened though what that Tim sent me a text message asking me how my day was going and told me that he loves ( Read more... )

1.) Where did you bring in 2006?
At my cousin's house.  Mom took a shot for the first time that night.

2.) What was your status by Valentine's Day?
It was complicated and not worth the time and effort

3.) Were you in school (anytime this year)?
I was at Witt and then transferred to Ivy Tech

4.) How did you earn your keep?
During the shool year I worked as ( Read more... )

I'm a perfectionist.  I hate it sometimes.  I've always had issues with wanting to be perfect and doing everything right.  When I was 12 it all started.  I thought that if I could be perfect that my dad wouldn't leave us.  I thought it was something that I did.  Like I wasn't good enough.  I beat myself up all the time.  I get down on myself.  I'm ( Read more... )

Ok so update on what's been going on.  We are great!!!  We worked things out.  Of course it ended up that I cried my heart out, but the weird thing is. . .he cried too.  I can already tell that he's trying to do better.  We got into a mini fight last night, but I was just being stupid and when I realized it, I got over it.

Today is our 3 month ( Read more... )

I've been thinking about this for so long that I'm starting to go numb.  One minuted I'm upset and want to cry because he forgets about me.  Then I think that I should be less needy, but I do have needs and they aren't being met.  Then I get mad that he forgot me.  Like what am I not good enough for you to even TEXT me to say goodnight.  I don't ( Read more... )

I am almost to my quitting point.  I love him so much, but he only thinks about himself.  He doesn't care how he makes me feel.  Last night he forgot about me and didn't send a text like he said he would. . .again.  This is the third time now.  I'm sick and tired of empty promises.  He says he wants to make me happy, but when it comes down to it, ( Read more... )

My body hates me and I hate my body.  I think it's getting back at me for what I do to it.  I can't help it.  I have a problem and it's getting worse.  If you knew anything about me, you would know what I'm talking about.  Tim tries to help me, but he just can't.  He doesn't know how to manipulate me.  I ish someone would.  Someone needs to address ( Read more... )