fuck a monkey. fuck a monkey with another monkey. take a smaller monkey and insert it into a bigger monkey and move it in and out for a little while so both monkeys have the distinct feeling that they have been good and dandily fucked. take that kid's game a barrel full of monkeys and give the whole barrel a good ole steamy pounding. may all ( Read more... )

put away the screams
in your brass handled drawer:
memories contained by leather and felt
retaining his smell.
that box has all of him
that i would not hope to see again;
manilas of journals kept
before his son broke his heart:
schedules of eating
and sex and working.
you missed my life,
but i saw our death
and i can only judge myself now

okay, my particular weirdness even expands into my sleeping hours. i have a reoccurring dream where i'm searching for star wars figures. can't help it. i shop for toys in my sleep. it's usually a junk store or a flea market type setting and it's usually stuff i used to have and lost, but the strange things is, i dream of actual merchandise. ( Read more... )

okay, a movie, nay, a film that gets me right here. can't help it. it's a sports movie, basically. you know the winner. you know the outcome. but it was 2 hours 24 minutes of great acting and just a reminder of the joy of movies. you got russel crowe, the man to bring out the--uh--bear in any straight man. he's playing a little older, a ( Read more... )

i realize i have a serious problem. i realize it every time a new cd, book, comic or movie comes out. i know the average guy has an internal debate while shopping. "do i buy this new pair of pants, or should the cat eat this week?" do i want my arm pits to smell like cool sport or arctic frost? but i think my problem goes a little deeper. i ( Read more... )

Your Penis Name is: Darth Vader

Get your own Penis Name

okay, star wars again...i can't believe the opening scroll began with: WAR! did no one else think of that song (quoted in subject line?) it struck me the first time, but, after the second time, i finally figured out what tickled me about that part...(absolutely nothing, say it again ( Read more... )

Brief ( Read more... )

speaking of star wars, i finally figured out why i'm sick...i fucking caught general grievous's cough. i've got the same dry raspiness that he exhibits through-out the film. and even watching the clone wars cartoon, i have no good answer for amy why a cyborg would be coughing. if he can replace parts, then just replace the lungs, or the throat ( Read more... )

Ah, to work at a theater during an episode of star wars ( Read more... )