I want to write "press for a good time" above the crosswalk green light button box.

Once, when i was a little kid, i saw a duck poop out brown foam. The image has haunted me ever since.

I occasionally read Dlisted and recently there was a story on Anne Hathaway getting engaged to some guy. A lot of comments were about how terrible he looks, but to me Anne Hathaway herself always looked like a grotesque nightmare-world version of a person, so i went ahead and made a photo where i try to make them both look like normal people, ( Read more... )

The announcer from Saturday Night Live sounds like an old timey ghost.

When you're 30 it's too late to kill yourself. If you kill yourself young, say in your early twenties, everyone secretly envies you because you checked out before you sucked the big greasy schlong of life. You basically looked at all the other wretched saps miserably gobbling on it and said "I'm not sucking that! Later suckers!". But by the time ( Read more... )

I love getting my hair washed at the hairdresser's. There's something about relinquishing yourself to someone else that's so liberating and relaxing. It can be hard and exhausting wanting to be in and maintaining control. I'm not talking about running an oligarchy, but simply about the daily grind of life, like making sure the gas company hasn't ( Read more... )

This video is a work of art. The protagonist represents such a captivating amalgam; a childish, gentle ruffian, overwhelmed by the world, that in part made him the way he is. It's an incredibly multilayered and subtle portrayal, exploding with emotional impressions, telling a story that in scope surpasses the limits of such a short medium like the ( Read more... )

Boy, those city folk in AMC's The Walking Dead sure were orderly in their evacuation. I mean, the outgoing lanes are all full and the incoming lanes are completely empty. It's like no one wanted to be the first to get all smartypants and use the empty incoming lanes to get ahead. It wouldn't even be such a douche idea; it's an evacuation, using the ( Read more... )

I'm on a Star Trek starship and there's some kind of strange object disrupting the universe and disabling the ship. I put on a space suite and go out where i manage to phase into another reality and discover that the object is a vast and complex machine made out of light. I ride one of it's light beams to it's center and land on what appears to be ( Read more... )

Who are the people who slather the babies in baby birth scenes? Are they regular makeup artists or are they specialized weirdos because normal people don't want to slather little babies in grime and gunk? That's so weird, to slather a little baby in horrible, disgusting grime and gunk. I wonder if they get pleasure from it? I mean, a socially ( Read more... )