Fanfic: Symphonies of Blinding Light | Part III
For harlequinkradam
Title: Symphonies of Blinding Light (lyric taken from the Linkin Park song “The Catalyst”)
Word Count: 24,500-ish
Type: Angst/Romance
Rated: R
PART I
PART II
**
Kris cringed as Lucy stomped between the kitchen island and the informal dining table. He had been trying to take a nap when she barged her way into his house.
“I swear to God and Muhammed and Allah and Ra and Jesus, Mary and Joseph, if you hurt this boy at all, at all or if you’re playing some sick and twisted game because you need a fucking ego boost…”
“Good god woman! Stop!” he grabbed her shoulders to halt her steps. “First off, he’s not a boy. You’re barely older than he is and he’s older than me. Secondly, I’m not playing a game. And lastly, weren’t you the one who was trying to set me up with him in the first place?”
Lucy avoided looking at Kris. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Cassidy spilled the beans when I was shopping at his boutique last week. And where is this rant coming from? How’d you find out that we were even talking, much less ‘sort of’ dating?” He pulled her towards the chair and motioned for her to sit.
“Oh.” She straightened up, “But that was before you became the asshole at dinner. I thought that dinner would, like, spark something and obviously it didn’t.”
Kris pointed to the chair, “Sit. You’re driving me nuts with your stomping.” He waited for her to sit down before taking the seat across from her. “As for sparks or whatever, I had other things on my mind that night. But after seeing him at the club, then at your party, I dunno. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Then after he showed up here all drunk and he was too adorable, you know? We’ve been talking and went to …”
“Whoa,” Lucy interrupted, putting her hands up. “Hold up. What?” she screeched. “He showed up here. Drunk.”
Kris nodded.
“Then what?”
“Nothing. He passed out on the couch. We talked a little the next morning, I made him breakfast, then drove him home. We went out on Sunday. Tomorrow we’re having dinner and I’m staying for his show. And here we are.”
Lucy groaned and let her head fall onto the table. She pounded her forehead against it a couple times, before mumbling, “You won’t hurt him right?”
“Why would I hurt him?” Kris pouted, feeling hurt. “Why are you thinking the worst of me all the time?”
“Oh sweetie,” she lifted her head and faced him. “You’ve been acting…not yourself since the divorce,” she stated carefully. Kris rolled his eyes. “He’s such a sweet thing and a romantic and a big overgrown puppy.”
“He’s 27.”
She cradled her head in the crook of her elbow against the table, “He’s had his heart broken.”
“Who hasn’t?”
“I heard it broke him Kris,” she said softly. “It was bad from what Cassidy said. He’s just getting back to normal, and now you’re in his life in a big way. All his friends are a little worried because it seems like he’s going into this full-speed ahead like the last time.”
Kris crouched down and put his chin on the table to meet Lucy’s eyes. “I like him Lucy. A lot. He calms me. He inspires me. And as cliché as this sounds, he makes me want to be a better person.” He took her hand into his. “If anything, I think he has the power to hurt me and break my heart.”
Lucy tightened her fingers around Kris’s. He sat unflinching and allowed her to look at him, really look Into him. Seemingly satisfied with what she saw, she nodded and gave his hand a final squeeze and let go.
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah, okay. I should get going.” the chair scraped against the hardwood floor as she stood up. “You walking me to the door or what?”
Kris smiled and tucked her hand into the crook of his arm as they walked to the door. She turned and gave him a giant hug, “You know I love you right?” she whispered in his ear. Kris nodded. “Just so you know, I’ll stick a stiletto up your ass so fast it’ll come out of your nose if you fuck this up.”
Kris laughed as he pulled back. “Yeah, I know,” he said tweaking her nose. “You never did answer my question though.”
She gave him a questioning look.
“The one about how you found out about this so that you could come barging into my house and yell at me?”
“Aww, come on. You know how I always get the gossip.” She kissed him on the cheek. “See you tomorrow.”
Kris waved goodbye and closed the door. He leaned against it and slid down to the floor. He muttered, “Tomorrow should be fun.”
**
There was a line down the block of people trying to get into the club. Adam noticed extra stanchions and velvet ropes extending further down than usual. Kris drove into the back alleyway for employees.
“It’s really okay for me to park back here?” Kris asked.
“Yeah, since I don’t have my car, you can park in my spot. There,” he pointed. “Damn, never seen the line that long before.”
“It’s great. It means word’s getting out about you and the club,” Kris replied. “Better this than it being half-empty.”
Adam nodded. He was getting excited. Dinner with Kris had been a mellow affair. He had picked him up at 5 pm sharp and they had gone to a diner down the street from his apartment. The staff had nodded to Adam and had barely given Kris any notice. They had talked about everything and nothing again. Kris had brought up Adam’s set list. Adam smiled remembering what had come next. He had been chewing on his lips then froze when Kris had leaned over the table and kissed him.
“What was that for?” he questioned.
“If anyone should be doing that to your lips, it should be me. Now, stop fidgeting and tell me about the new songs for your set,” he said, before sitting back down.
Adam blinked hard and tried to speak. He felt himself blushing and getting flustered.
Kris grinned, “Come on.”
“Uh, yeah. I’m adding in Starlight from Muse and Mad World from Tears for Fears. It’ll be more acoustic. Lucy said there’d be some industry people there tonight and thought that would showcase my voice more, rather than the swively, bendy stuff. Just to show more range, you know?”
Kris reached across the table to stop Adam’s hands from shredding the napkin into smaller pieces. “I think that’s a great idea. I’m totally blown away by your voice. Hell, it’s a lot better than mine and lord know a ton of other people on the radio today.”
Adam twisted his lips, “I guess. I’m just so used to belting it out and going kind of crazy.” He slumped down into the seat. “It’s just really frustrating.”
“No, no,” Kris answered. He smoothed his thumbs over Adam’s knuckles. “You’re close. I can feel it. I just don’t know how you haven’t been discovered before and singing your ass off in front of thousands of people.”
Adam laughed, “I’m not exactly the subtle type. I’m kind of out there with my lifestyle choices and how I dress and act.”
“Shouldn’t matter. No, I know it does. Everyone’s put into a safe box and god forbid you want to try something new or different. Unfortunately, it’s the state of the music business today.” Kris paused to study Adam’s face. “Think of it this way. Compromise a little now, then once you generate a fan base, get some power, you do what you want to. It might take some time, but as long as you have faith that you’ll get there, the road is worth it.”
“Is that what you did?”
Kris looked at their entwined fingers, “Yeah, looking back, I totally did. I was just so excited to get signed that I didn’t think about the business side. And it is a business. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It’s full of a bunch of scared men who are so behind the times in terms of technology. They have shareholders to answer to, so yeah, they’re looking to make a quick buck, not cultivate artists like back in the day. It’s all about singles. It’s become a short-term industry, not long-term.”
“Great,” Adam mumbled.
“Don’t think about the negative,” Kris said, pulling their hands closer to him. “You get to make music. You’re sharing your voice with hundreds of thousands of people. I’m a little jaded to the whole business side of things, but when I get up on that stage or when I’m in a studio, the thrill of it, the excitement. It all comes back.”
“If I ever get that chance.”
“You will.”
Kris brought Adam’s hands to his lips, “Come on. Let’s get you up on that stage and bring the audience to its knees.”
Adam smiled.
They fought over the check briefly until Kris insisted on paying, “I asked you out,” he reasoned. Adam sighed, “Fine, but I get to buy you a drink or three at the club, yeah?”
Kris smiled back with that endearing crooked lift of his lips, “Deal.”
They stared at each other with matching silly grins before Kris snapped out of it to sign the credit card slip.
“Ready to go?” Kris asked. He staggered slightly as he slipped out of the booth.
“You okay Kris?”
“Uh, yeah, of course. I think my leg fell asleep or something. I’m good,” Kris replied shakily.
Adam bit back a smile as he slid out of his side of the booth. Kris’s little lie didn’t fool him at all. It was nice to know that his crush was no longer one-sided. He kept that little tidbit to himself, trying not to flail outwardly.
“Okay, just making sure,” he said and held out his hand.
Kris glanced at Adam’s outstretched hand and grabbed it. He gave it a slight squeeze. Lacing their fingers together, Adam held the door open as they walked out of the restaurant.
**
Adam couldn’t sit or stand still. He went from sitting to jumping back up and making circles around the make-shift box that served as the coffee table. The small backroom acted as his dressing room on his performance night and tonight, it felt like it couldn’t contain him. The rush from the crowds’ applause and cheers was coursing through his body. He wasn’t able to sit or stand still.
“Holy shit!” he shouted. He stretched his arms up and out and then ran his fingers through his sweat-drenched hair. “Hot damn!”
Lucy had arranged for two of the club’s bouncers to escort him off the stage right after the encore. The feeling of giddiness and bliss continued to run through his veins like a drug.
He was feeling high. A high like he never felt before. Damn, he thought, drugs have nothing on this.
He heard the knock and jerked the door open, body filled with adrenaline. Monte tackled him and Lisa came in with the biggest smile on her face.
“Shit son!” Monte hollered, “You were unfuckinbelievable tonight!” He lifted Adam into a tight bear hug. “I am so fucking proud of you right now you have no idea.”
“Monte,” Lisa admonished and grabbed an arm. “He can’t breathe.”
Monte released him and laughed, pulling his wife into a fierce hug, “Can you believe what just happened?” He lifted and twirled her around in the small room, nearly knocking over a stool.
Lisa laughed, “Let me down you goof and let me hug Adam.” He dropped her lightly and she took two steps and grabbed Adam’s face.
“You were amazing,” she said proudly, tears in her eyes. “You did good. More than good.”
Adam choked up hearing the words from her. He hugged her tightly, not caring that he was sweaty and gross. He buried his face into the crook of her neck feeling her arms squeeze him as she pulled him in closer. They both stifled laughs as Monte came up to them and hugged them both.
They didn’t hear the door open or anyone came in until Lucy cleared her throat, “Um, hello?”
Three tear-streaked faces turned towards her. She closed the door and leaned against it. “Wow. Now there’s a picture.”
Adam untangled himself and launched himself at Lucy. He lifted her up and embraced her, “Thank you,” he whispered.
She punched his shoulder, “Put me down you big troglodyte. You’re messing up my outfit and getting sweat on me.” Adam snickered as he set her back on her feet and shook his hair at her. She rolled her eyes, “What I put up with.”
Adam took a step back, “What’s up?”
“First off,” she said pulling at her jacket to straighten it, “Holy shitballs Adam!” and launched herself back at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She kissed him soundly on the cheek before jumping off him.
“Oh my god, Lucy!” Adam laughed. “Seriously?”
“What?” she said. “I was supposed to hug you first you ass. Now, I have some news.” She looked over at Monte, “Did you tell him?”
He shook his head, “Didn’t get a chance to.”
“Oh yay!” she squealed. She gripped Adam’s shoulder, “A couple of A&R folks from Matador, Sub Pop, Jive and East West were here tonight. Monte and I made arrangements for meetings in the next few weeks, okay?”
Adam stood frozen and shocked. He turned to Monte. Monte nodded and mouthed, “It’s true.” He faced Lucy again. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He staggered back and fell onto the couch as soon as his calves hit the base.
Lucy walked to him and kneeled in front of him, “You okay?”
He shook his head, “Really?”
She carefully took the tips of his shaking fingers into her hands, “Really.” She smiled, “You’re going places, kid.”
“I…I…Wow,” he exhaled. He grinned. “Wow.”
Lucy tossed her head to the side, “I’m glad you sing better than you talk.”
Adam finally laughed. A full blown shout of laughter filled the room. He couldn’t breathe. “Shit.”
“Uh, ya think?” Lucy replied. She got up and headed to the door. “Get cleaned up. Got some people you need to meet.”
“Where’s Kris?” he asked, stopping her.
“He’s chatting up some folks and signing autographs. I made him stay out there,” she winked and closed the door behind her.
**
The rest of the night passed by so quickly, Adam was dizzy. Ruben had cleared out a VIP area for Adam where he could sit with his friends. Monte, Lucy and Kris worked the room like pros while he spied on them from behind the rails, following their every movement.
He didn’t see Kris come up behind him, jumping when a hand landed on his shoulder.
“Hey, just me,” a soft voice said in his ear.
Adam relaxed, “Sorry, I was spying and wasn’t paying attention.”
Kris laughed and took the seat on the couch next to him. “I didn’t get a chance to ask earlier, how’re you feeling?”
“I think the adrenaline’s finally worn off.”
Kris leaned his head against his shoulder, “It’s an amazing feeling isn’t it?”
Adam nodded, wrapping an arm around Kris’s shoulders. He liked the feeling of Kris next to him like this. They sat and watched as Ruben and Monte chatted animatedly about something. Lucy was flirting with one of the A&R guys as she walked him towards the exit.
“You ready to go?” Kris asked.
Adam reached for his hand, “A few more minutes?”
“No worries.”
They sat in silence watching as the club slowly emptied. Monte and Lisa came up to them. Monte leaned over the railing, “I’ll see you on Monday.” He turned to Kris and held out his hand, “Good to meet you, man. Have a good weekend. Let’s talk next week, yeah?”
Kris stood up half-way to reach his hand, “Yeah, good to finally put a face with a name. And, yeah, I’ll give you a call. We’ll set up some time.”
Lisa blew them both a kiss as they headed out arms wrapped around each other.
Adam looked at Kris, “What was that about?”
“Uh,” he said sheepishly, “I wanted to see about getting some guitar lessons.”
“Really?”
“I’m a little rusty, and I know the guys in the studio aren’t saying anything, and well, yeah. We all need to keep learning and growing, you know? Plus, after watching him with you, he’s amazing.”
Adam beamed, “He is. That’s awesome.”
Kris shrugged. He started to say something when Lucy bounded up and sat on their laps, squirming her way in between them. She wiggled until they moved over to give her room. She threw her arms around them, “And how are my two favorite boys doing?”
Adam pouted, “I thought Cass was your favorite.”
“Pffft,” she said, blowing out a raspberry. “I play favorites depending on my mood. Right now, you two are. Plus, who says you all can’t be my favorites, huh?” She leaned her head onto Adam’s shoulder. “And right now, you two gorgeous men are it. Besides, Cass isn’t here.”
Kris and Adam both laughed.
“Okay, my job here tonight is done.” She jumped spritely out from in between them and kissed them on their foreheads. “Goodnight boys and we’ll talk next week.”
Adam followed suit, “I think I’m ready to head out, too.” He offered his hand to help Kris get up.
“Not yet,” Kris said and grabbed Adam’s wrist, pulling him down into him. Adam’s left hand instinctively shot out to the back of the couch to keep him from toppling over, but he still landed clumsily on top of Kris.
Kris found Adam’s lips as their limbs got tangled. His tongue slid against Adam’s bottom lip, searching the seam until he opened. When he did, Kris pressed his tongue in and skimmed and licked the depths of his mouth. Kris took in Adam’s gasp and felt him relax his arms as he fell into Kris’s lap. Their tongues battled slowly, taking licks of each other until Adam took over and thrust his own tongue deep into Kris’s mouth. He pulled back and took Kris’s tongue with him, sucking it slow and hard.
Kris’s body exploded with heat. He hooked his arms around Adam’s shoulders and pushed his head closer. He felt Adam’s legs find their way on either side of his hips and straddle him. Kris lowered one arm to stroke his back. He dropped his other arm until he felt the waistband of Adam’s leather pants. Adam was at his neck, licking and kissing from behind his ear down to his collarbone, through his shirt, feeling the air cool the heated path.
“Oh for the love of god, get a room!” a voice boomed. “I’m not running a whore house!”
Kris’s head fell back as he started to laugh. They untangled themselves and pulled apart long enough to see Ruben glaring at them. “You two. Out. Club’s closed.”
“Uh, sorry Ruben,” Adam murmured, not sorry at all.
“Yeah, sorry. We didn’t mean to…” Kris said. He tried to hide his smile knowing neither of them were sorry.
Ruben cut them off by rolling his eyes and pointedly jerking his head towards the door, “Get the hell out and I’ll see you next weekend.” He stomped away muttering about out of control hormones and reupholstering the furniture.
Adam carefully climbed off Kris’s lap and held his hand out again, “Let’s try this again, shall we?”
Kris took it and got right up, “I think that was our cue, huh?”
Laughing they strolled arm-in-arm down the back hallway. Adam called out to Ruben to let him know they were leaving. Ruben peaked out from behind the office door, “You assholes still here?”
**
One Year Later
“You tired?” Adam whispered.
“Yeah. But I don’t want to leave yet,” Kris replied softly.
“Good. Me neither.”
They say on a giant blanket on the beach, huddled together with additional blankets to keep them warm. The bonfire beach party had died hours ago and only the two of them remained.
Adam smiled contently as Kris snuggled in closer. He shifted until Kris was sitting in front of him, back to chest, arms caged around him in an affectionate embrace. He nuzzled Kris’s neck. “Thank you.”
“For what?” Kris murmured. He tilted his head to give Adam more access, shivering from the slide of his tongue and teeth as they ran slowly up and down his neck.
“This. That. Everything from the last few months. Being there with me on this crazy ride. The last year and a half has been incredible and ridiculous, but…
Kris groaned as Adam sucked the soft spot behind his ear, “Mmm. Um, oh, that’s nice.”
“I’m serious, Kris.”
“I know, but it’s hard to concentrate when you’re doing that.”
Adam laughed, “Fine. I’ll stop.”
Kris pushed his back against Adam’s chest, “Don’t you dare, it feels too good.”
Adam entwined their fingers together and rested his chin on Kris’s shoulder, “I mean it. Thank you.”
Kris twisted until he could see Adam’s face, “I don’t know what you’re thanking me for.” He lifted his hand to cup Adam’s cheek, “You did it yourself.”
Adam moved his faced to kiss his palm, “But you were there to support me.”
“All of your friends did. It wasn’t just me. We all had faith in you.”
“But it was different with you.”
“Why?” Kris moved his hand to make Adam look at him. Blue eyes pierced his. He still couldn’t get over how beautiful he was. He leaned in and kissed the tip of his nose, laughing when Adam scrunched it.
“Why? Why is it different with me?” he nudged.
Adam lifted his face from Kris’s warm hand and looked out to the ocean. “I don’t know. It’s just different. I mean, you actually wrote a couple songs for my album. You helped me navigate all this craziness. I mean, when my album came out last year, you were, like, my biggest promoter. Taking me to all those events and pimping out my album. Then when I went on tour, you showing up to a few shows. You didn’t have…”
“I wanted to,” Kris interrupted with a kiss.
Adam chuckled, “Your stand-by line with me.”
Kris thought back and grinned, “Yeah, I guess it is, huh? Believe me. I did…I do all this because I want to. I know I don’t have to, but I want to. That’s the difference.”
“I know and I love you for it.”
“I love you too.”
They sat embraced in each other’s arms as the heavy blackness of the night slowly lifted.
“We should get going. If we stay out here any longer, our bits are going to freeze off,” Kris said pulling his way out of Adam’s hold.
“Speak for yourself about the bitty bit,” Adam retorted as he wrapped the blanket around him tighter. “But, fuck, yeah, it got cold.”
They gathered the blankets and extra coolers and made their way up to the car. Adam drove up the hill toward Kris’s, no, now their home.
“Hey, it’s almost dawn, pull over at the turn-out,” Kris said excitedly.
Adam parked the car to face east. He left the engine running and lowered the windows to hear the music through the car’s speakers. They grabbed the blankets from the trunk and sat on the hood of the car and waited. The lights of the Los Angeles basin started to dim with the approaching morning sun. They faced eastward and saw the downtown skyline.
The first rays of the sun glinted out over the top of the tallest buildings. Like a lazy laser light show, beams sprayed in all directions pointing everywhere and nowhere. The bright and dazzling shafts of light hit the mirrored sides of the buildings creating flashes of vivid yellows and oranges and shooting them upward and over Los Angeles.
As the sun edged in between the high-rises, a symphony of blinding light reached out and touched Kris and Adam, warming them, loving them.
**
Six Months Later
Kris checked on the backyard one more time. The lights were strung up around the trees. Soft spotlights highlighted the white tablecloths on the buffet tables. Bartenders were wiping down glasses and chipping ice.
“Why are you so nervous?” Lucy asked.
“I just need everything to be perfect,” he stated.
“It is you schmuck. Remember who took care of the details,” she said, jabbing his side as she walked to the kitchen.
Kris released a laugh, “Of course. You are always so modest, I forget that you’re actually a bitch sometimes.”
She turned and made a kissy face at him, “You love me.”
“I do. And thank you.”
“Wait, what?” She craned her head and cupped her ear. “Did I hear that correctly? Or did the lack of food all day make me start hallucinating?” she teased, dodging the carrot thrown at her.
“Shut up.”
She bent over to pick up the carrot and delicately tossed it into the sink. “Bitch, please. You throw like a girl.”
“You know, if Adam didn’t like you so much,” Kris stated as he walked towards her, “You wouldn’t even be a part of this wedding.”
“What?” she mock squealed. “After all I did for you, you ungrateful…”
He hugged her tight and nuzzled her neck, “I don’t know what I’d do without you and your love and support all these years, baby girl,” he whispered.
She hugged him back just as tight, “I love you too Kris Allen.” She pushed him away, “Now get away from me you teeny lug, you’re going to make me cry and ruin my make-up.”
He laughed and turned as the doorbell rang. The first of the guests had arrived.
**
Monte and Cassidy fussed with his tie so much that Adam was about to strangle them both with it. He was trying to plan the logistics of that when he heard the doorbell.
“It’s time!” Lucy chirped as she entered the guest house. She stopped, “Wow, you…you’re just too gorgeous for your own good sweetie.”
Adam beamed. He marched over to her and lifted her into a giant hug. She hugged him back then tapped his shoulder to be put down.
“What is it with you guys all hugging up and kissing up on me?” she asked. “Are you not getting enough from each other? Jesus.”
Adam leaned and placed a delicate kiss on her forehead, “You are awesome and I love you.”
Lucy faked a swoon, “Be still my heart. The two most gorgeous men on the planet declare their love for me, yet…they’re marrying each other.” She slapped his arm, “Fuckers, the whole lot of you.”
Cassidy pulled her away laughing, “Don’t be all jealous honey. Your prince charming will show up. Maybe Adam and Kris will buy you one from a charity auction. What do you think?”
Lucy laughed, “Fuck off asshole.”
She turned to the men in the room and clapped her hands, “Ready boys?”
**
Only in Us!
Us Weekly, May 25th Edition
“The intimate ceremony in the backyard of Kris Allen and Adam Lambert took place at sunset on May 5th. Sources close to the couple reveal only a handful of guests were on the uber-selective invitation list, totaling possibly 20-30 people, including family. Catering was done by Parq, an obvious wink to where the two singers met. The wedding party was outfitted by Giorgio Armani. No honeymoon destination was revealed, but Us has learned that Tahiti, Australia or the Cayman Islands were among the choices.”
Allen-Lambert Wedding Details Revealed
People, May 23rd Edition
“The super secret May 5th wedding of Kris Allen and Adam Lambert took place in the musicians’ own backyard. The event was attended by 20 of their closest friends and family members. Superstars Allen and Lambert met three years ago from a charity auction dinner date at Parq inside the Montage Hotel in Beverly Hills. A source close to the couple revealed that the grooms and all the guests were beaming and laughing throughout the 30 minute non-denominational ceremony. Attendees were treated to a buffet dinner provided by Parq Restaurant, in an apparent nod to their first meeting, dessert by Just Desserts and music by Luna Park’s own Ruben Jackson.”
~the end~
Title: Symphonies of Blinding Light (lyric taken from the Linkin Park song “The Catalyst”)
Word Count: 24,500-ish
Type: Angst/Romance
Rated: R
PART I
PART II
**
Kris cringed as Lucy stomped between the kitchen island and the informal dining table. He had been trying to take a nap when she barged her way into his house.
“I swear to God and Muhammed and Allah and Ra and Jesus, Mary and Joseph, if you hurt this boy at all, at all or if you’re playing some sick and twisted game because you need a fucking ego boost…”
“Good god woman! Stop!” he grabbed her shoulders to halt her steps. “First off, he’s not a boy. You’re barely older than he is and he’s older than me. Secondly, I’m not playing a game. And lastly, weren’t you the one who was trying to set me up with him in the first place?”
Lucy avoided looking at Kris. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Cassidy spilled the beans when I was shopping at his boutique last week. And where is this rant coming from? How’d you find out that we were even talking, much less ‘sort of’ dating?” He pulled her towards the chair and motioned for her to sit.
“Oh.” She straightened up, “But that was before you became the asshole at dinner. I thought that dinner would, like, spark something and obviously it didn’t.”
Kris pointed to the chair, “Sit. You’re driving me nuts with your stomping.” He waited for her to sit down before taking the seat across from her. “As for sparks or whatever, I had other things on my mind that night. But after seeing him at the club, then at your party, I dunno. I couldn’t stop thinking about him. Then after he showed up here all drunk and he was too adorable, you know? We’ve been talking and went to …”
“Whoa,” Lucy interrupted, putting her hands up. “Hold up. What?” she screeched. “He showed up here. Drunk.”
Kris nodded.
“Then what?”
“Nothing. He passed out on the couch. We talked a little the next morning, I made him breakfast, then drove him home. We went out on Sunday. Tomorrow we’re having dinner and I’m staying for his show. And here we are.”
Lucy groaned and let her head fall onto the table. She pounded her forehead against it a couple times, before mumbling, “You won’t hurt him right?”
“Why would I hurt him?” Kris pouted, feeling hurt. “Why are you thinking the worst of me all the time?”
“Oh sweetie,” she lifted her head and faced him. “You’ve been acting…not yourself since the divorce,” she stated carefully. Kris rolled his eyes. “He’s such a sweet thing and a romantic and a big overgrown puppy.”
“He’s 27.”
She cradled her head in the crook of her elbow against the table, “He’s had his heart broken.”
“Who hasn’t?”
“I heard it broke him Kris,” she said softly. “It was bad from what Cassidy said. He’s just getting back to normal, and now you’re in his life in a big way. All his friends are a little worried because it seems like he’s going into this full-speed ahead like the last time.”
Kris crouched down and put his chin on the table to meet Lucy’s eyes. “I like him Lucy. A lot. He calms me. He inspires me. And as cliché as this sounds, he makes me want to be a better person.” He took her hand into his. “If anything, I think he has the power to hurt me and break my heart.”
Lucy tightened her fingers around Kris’s. He sat unflinching and allowed her to look at him, really look Into him. Seemingly satisfied with what she saw, she nodded and gave his hand a final squeeze and let go.
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah, okay. I should get going.” the chair scraped against the hardwood floor as she stood up. “You walking me to the door or what?”
Kris smiled and tucked her hand into the crook of his arm as they walked to the door. She turned and gave him a giant hug, “You know I love you right?” she whispered in his ear. Kris nodded. “Just so you know, I’ll stick a stiletto up your ass so fast it’ll come out of your nose if you fuck this up.”
Kris laughed as he pulled back. “Yeah, I know,” he said tweaking her nose. “You never did answer my question though.”
She gave him a questioning look.
“The one about how you found out about this so that you could come barging into my house and yell at me?”
“Aww, come on. You know how I always get the gossip.” She kissed him on the cheek. “See you tomorrow.”
Kris waved goodbye and closed the door. He leaned against it and slid down to the floor. He muttered, “Tomorrow should be fun.”
**
There was a line down the block of people trying to get into the club. Adam noticed extra stanchions and velvet ropes extending further down than usual. Kris drove into the back alleyway for employees.
“It’s really okay for me to park back here?” Kris asked.
“Yeah, since I don’t have my car, you can park in my spot. There,” he pointed. “Damn, never seen the line that long before.”
“It’s great. It means word’s getting out about you and the club,” Kris replied. “Better this than it being half-empty.”
Adam nodded. He was getting excited. Dinner with Kris had been a mellow affair. He had picked him up at 5 pm sharp and they had gone to a diner down the street from his apartment. The staff had nodded to Adam and had barely given Kris any notice. They had talked about everything and nothing again. Kris had brought up Adam’s set list. Adam smiled remembering what had come next. He had been chewing on his lips then froze when Kris had leaned over the table and kissed him.
“What was that for?” he questioned.
“If anyone should be doing that to your lips, it should be me. Now, stop fidgeting and tell me about the new songs for your set,” he said, before sitting back down.
Adam blinked hard and tried to speak. He felt himself blushing and getting flustered.
Kris grinned, “Come on.”
“Uh, yeah. I’m adding in Starlight from Muse and Mad World from Tears for Fears. It’ll be more acoustic. Lucy said there’d be some industry people there tonight and thought that would showcase my voice more, rather than the swively, bendy stuff. Just to show more range, you know?”
Kris reached across the table to stop Adam’s hands from shredding the napkin into smaller pieces. “I think that’s a great idea. I’m totally blown away by your voice. Hell, it’s a lot better than mine and lord know a ton of other people on the radio today.”
Adam twisted his lips, “I guess. I’m just so used to belting it out and going kind of crazy.” He slumped down into the seat. “It’s just really frustrating.”
“No, no,” Kris answered. He smoothed his thumbs over Adam’s knuckles. “You’re close. I can feel it. I just don’t know how you haven’t been discovered before and singing your ass off in front of thousands of people.”
Adam laughed, “I’m not exactly the subtle type. I’m kind of out there with my lifestyle choices and how I dress and act.”
“Shouldn’t matter. No, I know it does. Everyone’s put into a safe box and god forbid you want to try something new or different. Unfortunately, it’s the state of the music business today.” Kris paused to study Adam’s face. “Think of it this way. Compromise a little now, then once you generate a fan base, get some power, you do what you want to. It might take some time, but as long as you have faith that you’ll get there, the road is worth it.”
“Is that what you did?”
Kris looked at their entwined fingers, “Yeah, looking back, I totally did. I was just so excited to get signed that I didn’t think about the business side. And it is a business. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It’s full of a bunch of scared men who are so behind the times in terms of technology. They have shareholders to answer to, so yeah, they’re looking to make a quick buck, not cultivate artists like back in the day. It’s all about singles. It’s become a short-term industry, not long-term.”
“Great,” Adam mumbled.
“Don’t think about the negative,” Kris said, pulling their hands closer to him. “You get to make music. You’re sharing your voice with hundreds of thousands of people. I’m a little jaded to the whole business side of things, but when I get up on that stage or when I’m in a studio, the thrill of it, the excitement. It all comes back.”
“If I ever get that chance.”
“You will.”
Kris brought Adam’s hands to his lips, “Come on. Let’s get you up on that stage and bring the audience to its knees.”
Adam smiled.
They fought over the check briefly until Kris insisted on paying, “I asked you out,” he reasoned. Adam sighed, “Fine, but I get to buy you a drink or three at the club, yeah?”
Kris smiled back with that endearing crooked lift of his lips, “Deal.”
They stared at each other with matching silly grins before Kris snapped out of it to sign the credit card slip.
“Ready to go?” Kris asked. He staggered slightly as he slipped out of the booth.
“You okay Kris?”
“Uh, yeah, of course. I think my leg fell asleep or something. I’m good,” Kris replied shakily.
Adam bit back a smile as he slid out of his side of the booth. Kris’s little lie didn’t fool him at all. It was nice to know that his crush was no longer one-sided. He kept that little tidbit to himself, trying not to flail outwardly.
“Okay, just making sure,” he said and held out his hand.
Kris glanced at Adam’s outstretched hand and grabbed it. He gave it a slight squeeze. Lacing their fingers together, Adam held the door open as they walked out of the restaurant.
**
Adam couldn’t sit or stand still. He went from sitting to jumping back up and making circles around the make-shift box that served as the coffee table. The small backroom acted as his dressing room on his performance night and tonight, it felt like it couldn’t contain him. The rush from the crowds’ applause and cheers was coursing through his body. He wasn’t able to sit or stand still.
“Holy shit!” he shouted. He stretched his arms up and out and then ran his fingers through his sweat-drenched hair. “Hot damn!”
Lucy had arranged for two of the club’s bouncers to escort him off the stage right after the encore. The feeling of giddiness and bliss continued to run through his veins like a drug.
He was feeling high. A high like he never felt before. Damn, he thought, drugs have nothing on this.
He heard the knock and jerked the door open, body filled with adrenaline. Monte tackled him and Lisa came in with the biggest smile on her face.
“Shit son!” Monte hollered, “You were unfuckinbelievable tonight!” He lifted Adam into a tight bear hug. “I am so fucking proud of you right now you have no idea.”
“Monte,” Lisa admonished and grabbed an arm. “He can’t breathe.”
Monte released him and laughed, pulling his wife into a fierce hug, “Can you believe what just happened?” He lifted and twirled her around in the small room, nearly knocking over a stool.
Lisa laughed, “Let me down you goof and let me hug Adam.” He dropped her lightly and she took two steps and grabbed Adam’s face.
“You were amazing,” she said proudly, tears in her eyes. “You did good. More than good.”
Adam choked up hearing the words from her. He hugged her tightly, not caring that he was sweaty and gross. He buried his face into the crook of her neck feeling her arms squeeze him as she pulled him in closer. They both stifled laughs as Monte came up to them and hugged them both.
They didn’t hear the door open or anyone came in until Lucy cleared her throat, “Um, hello?”
Three tear-streaked faces turned towards her. She closed the door and leaned against it. “Wow. Now there’s a picture.”
Adam untangled himself and launched himself at Lucy. He lifted her up and embraced her, “Thank you,” he whispered.
She punched his shoulder, “Put me down you big troglodyte. You’re messing up my outfit and getting sweat on me.” Adam snickered as he set her back on her feet and shook his hair at her. She rolled her eyes, “What I put up with.”
Adam took a step back, “What’s up?”
“First off,” she said pulling at her jacket to straighten it, “Holy shitballs Adam!” and launched herself back at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. She kissed him soundly on the cheek before jumping off him.
“Oh my god, Lucy!” Adam laughed. “Seriously?”
“What?” she said. “I was supposed to hug you first you ass. Now, I have some news.” She looked over at Monte, “Did you tell him?”
He shook his head, “Didn’t get a chance to.”
“Oh yay!” she squealed. She gripped Adam’s shoulder, “A couple of A&R folks from Matador, Sub Pop, Jive and East West were here tonight. Monte and I made arrangements for meetings in the next few weeks, okay?”
Adam stood frozen and shocked. He turned to Monte. Monte nodded and mouthed, “It’s true.” He faced Lucy again. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He staggered back and fell onto the couch as soon as his calves hit the base.
Lucy walked to him and kneeled in front of him, “You okay?”
He shook his head, “Really?”
She carefully took the tips of his shaking fingers into her hands, “Really.” She smiled, “You’re going places, kid.”
“I…I…Wow,” he exhaled. He grinned. “Wow.”
Lucy tossed her head to the side, “I’m glad you sing better than you talk.”
Adam finally laughed. A full blown shout of laughter filled the room. He couldn’t breathe. “Shit.”
“Uh, ya think?” Lucy replied. She got up and headed to the door. “Get cleaned up. Got some people you need to meet.”
“Where’s Kris?” he asked, stopping her.
“He’s chatting up some folks and signing autographs. I made him stay out there,” she winked and closed the door behind her.
**
The rest of the night passed by so quickly, Adam was dizzy. Ruben had cleared out a VIP area for Adam where he could sit with his friends. Monte, Lucy and Kris worked the room like pros while he spied on them from behind the rails, following their every movement.
He didn’t see Kris come up behind him, jumping when a hand landed on his shoulder.
“Hey, just me,” a soft voice said in his ear.
Adam relaxed, “Sorry, I was spying and wasn’t paying attention.”
Kris laughed and took the seat on the couch next to him. “I didn’t get a chance to ask earlier, how’re you feeling?”
“I think the adrenaline’s finally worn off.”
Kris leaned his head against his shoulder, “It’s an amazing feeling isn’t it?”
Adam nodded, wrapping an arm around Kris’s shoulders. He liked the feeling of Kris next to him like this. They sat and watched as Ruben and Monte chatted animatedly about something. Lucy was flirting with one of the A&R guys as she walked him towards the exit.
“You ready to go?” Kris asked.
Adam reached for his hand, “A few more minutes?”
“No worries.”
They sat in silence watching as the club slowly emptied. Monte and Lisa came up to them. Monte leaned over the railing, “I’ll see you on Monday.” He turned to Kris and held out his hand, “Good to meet you, man. Have a good weekend. Let’s talk next week, yeah?”
Kris stood up half-way to reach his hand, “Yeah, good to finally put a face with a name. And, yeah, I’ll give you a call. We’ll set up some time.”
Lisa blew them both a kiss as they headed out arms wrapped around each other.
Adam looked at Kris, “What was that about?”
“Uh,” he said sheepishly, “I wanted to see about getting some guitar lessons.”
“Really?”
“I’m a little rusty, and I know the guys in the studio aren’t saying anything, and well, yeah. We all need to keep learning and growing, you know? Plus, after watching him with you, he’s amazing.”
Adam beamed, “He is. That’s awesome.”
Kris shrugged. He started to say something when Lucy bounded up and sat on their laps, squirming her way in between them. She wiggled until they moved over to give her room. She threw her arms around them, “And how are my two favorite boys doing?”
Adam pouted, “I thought Cass was your favorite.”
“Pffft,” she said, blowing out a raspberry. “I play favorites depending on my mood. Right now, you two are. Plus, who says you all can’t be my favorites, huh?” She leaned her head onto Adam’s shoulder. “And right now, you two gorgeous men are it. Besides, Cass isn’t here.”
Kris and Adam both laughed.
“Okay, my job here tonight is done.” She jumped spritely out from in between them and kissed them on their foreheads. “Goodnight boys and we’ll talk next week.”
Adam followed suit, “I think I’m ready to head out, too.” He offered his hand to help Kris get up.
“Not yet,” Kris said and grabbed Adam’s wrist, pulling him down into him. Adam’s left hand instinctively shot out to the back of the couch to keep him from toppling over, but he still landed clumsily on top of Kris.
Kris found Adam’s lips as their limbs got tangled. His tongue slid against Adam’s bottom lip, searching the seam until he opened. When he did, Kris pressed his tongue in and skimmed and licked the depths of his mouth. Kris took in Adam’s gasp and felt him relax his arms as he fell into Kris’s lap. Their tongues battled slowly, taking licks of each other until Adam took over and thrust his own tongue deep into Kris’s mouth. He pulled back and took Kris’s tongue with him, sucking it slow and hard.
Kris’s body exploded with heat. He hooked his arms around Adam’s shoulders and pushed his head closer. He felt Adam’s legs find their way on either side of his hips and straddle him. Kris lowered one arm to stroke his back. He dropped his other arm until he felt the waistband of Adam’s leather pants. Adam was at his neck, licking and kissing from behind his ear down to his collarbone, through his shirt, feeling the air cool the heated path.
“Oh for the love of god, get a room!” a voice boomed. “I’m not running a whore house!”
Kris’s head fell back as he started to laugh. They untangled themselves and pulled apart long enough to see Ruben glaring at them. “You two. Out. Club’s closed.”
“Uh, sorry Ruben,” Adam murmured, not sorry at all.
“Yeah, sorry. We didn’t mean to…” Kris said. He tried to hide his smile knowing neither of them were sorry.
Ruben cut them off by rolling his eyes and pointedly jerking his head towards the door, “Get the hell out and I’ll see you next weekend.” He stomped away muttering about out of control hormones and reupholstering the furniture.
Adam carefully climbed off Kris’s lap and held his hand out again, “Let’s try this again, shall we?”
Kris took it and got right up, “I think that was our cue, huh?”
Laughing they strolled arm-in-arm down the back hallway. Adam called out to Ruben to let him know they were leaving. Ruben peaked out from behind the office door, “You assholes still here?”
**
One Year Later
“You tired?” Adam whispered.
“Yeah. But I don’t want to leave yet,” Kris replied softly.
“Good. Me neither.”
They say on a giant blanket on the beach, huddled together with additional blankets to keep them warm. The bonfire beach party had died hours ago and only the two of them remained.
Adam smiled contently as Kris snuggled in closer. He shifted until Kris was sitting in front of him, back to chest, arms caged around him in an affectionate embrace. He nuzzled Kris’s neck. “Thank you.”
“For what?” Kris murmured. He tilted his head to give Adam more access, shivering from the slide of his tongue and teeth as they ran slowly up and down his neck.
“This. That. Everything from the last few months. Being there with me on this crazy ride. The last year and a half has been incredible and ridiculous, but…
Kris groaned as Adam sucked the soft spot behind his ear, “Mmm. Um, oh, that’s nice.”
“I’m serious, Kris.”
“I know, but it’s hard to concentrate when you’re doing that.”
Adam laughed, “Fine. I’ll stop.”
Kris pushed his back against Adam’s chest, “Don’t you dare, it feels too good.”
Adam entwined their fingers together and rested his chin on Kris’s shoulder, “I mean it. Thank you.”
Kris twisted until he could see Adam’s face, “I don’t know what you’re thanking me for.” He lifted his hand to cup Adam’s cheek, “You did it yourself.”
Adam moved his faced to kiss his palm, “But you were there to support me.”
“All of your friends did. It wasn’t just me. We all had faith in you.”
“But it was different with you.”
“Why?” Kris moved his hand to make Adam look at him. Blue eyes pierced his. He still couldn’t get over how beautiful he was. He leaned in and kissed the tip of his nose, laughing when Adam scrunched it.
“Why? Why is it different with me?” he nudged.
Adam lifted his face from Kris’s warm hand and looked out to the ocean. “I don’t know. It’s just different. I mean, you actually wrote a couple songs for my album. You helped me navigate all this craziness. I mean, when my album came out last year, you were, like, my biggest promoter. Taking me to all those events and pimping out my album. Then when I went on tour, you showing up to a few shows. You didn’t have…”
“I wanted to,” Kris interrupted with a kiss.
Adam chuckled, “Your stand-by line with me.”
Kris thought back and grinned, “Yeah, I guess it is, huh? Believe me. I did…I do all this because I want to. I know I don’t have to, but I want to. That’s the difference.”
“I know and I love you for it.”
“I love you too.”
They sat embraced in each other’s arms as the heavy blackness of the night slowly lifted.
“We should get going. If we stay out here any longer, our bits are going to freeze off,” Kris said pulling his way out of Adam’s hold.
“Speak for yourself about the bitty bit,” Adam retorted as he wrapped the blanket around him tighter. “But, fuck, yeah, it got cold.”
They gathered the blankets and extra coolers and made their way up to the car. Adam drove up the hill toward Kris’s, no, now their home.
“Hey, it’s almost dawn, pull over at the turn-out,” Kris said excitedly.
Adam parked the car to face east. He left the engine running and lowered the windows to hear the music through the car’s speakers. They grabbed the blankets from the trunk and sat on the hood of the car and waited. The lights of the Los Angeles basin started to dim with the approaching morning sun. They faced eastward and saw the downtown skyline.
The first rays of the sun glinted out over the top of the tallest buildings. Like a lazy laser light show, beams sprayed in all directions pointing everywhere and nowhere. The bright and dazzling shafts of light hit the mirrored sides of the buildings creating flashes of vivid yellows and oranges and shooting them upward and over Los Angeles.
As the sun edged in between the high-rises, a symphony of blinding light reached out and touched Kris and Adam, warming them, loving them.
**
Six Months Later
Kris checked on the backyard one more time. The lights were strung up around the trees. Soft spotlights highlighted the white tablecloths on the buffet tables. Bartenders were wiping down glasses and chipping ice.
“Why are you so nervous?” Lucy asked.
“I just need everything to be perfect,” he stated.
“It is you schmuck. Remember who took care of the details,” she said, jabbing his side as she walked to the kitchen.
Kris released a laugh, “Of course. You are always so modest, I forget that you’re actually a bitch sometimes.”
She turned and made a kissy face at him, “You love me.”
“I do. And thank you.”
“Wait, what?” She craned her head and cupped her ear. “Did I hear that correctly? Or did the lack of food all day make me start hallucinating?” she teased, dodging the carrot thrown at her.
“Shut up.”
She bent over to pick up the carrot and delicately tossed it into the sink. “Bitch, please. You throw like a girl.”
“You know, if Adam didn’t like you so much,” Kris stated as he walked towards her, “You wouldn’t even be a part of this wedding.”
“What?” she mock squealed. “After all I did for you, you ungrateful…”
He hugged her tight and nuzzled her neck, “I don’t know what I’d do without you and your love and support all these years, baby girl,” he whispered.
She hugged him back just as tight, “I love you too Kris Allen.” She pushed him away, “Now get away from me you teeny lug, you’re going to make me cry and ruin my make-up.”
He laughed and turned as the doorbell rang. The first of the guests had arrived.
**
Monte and Cassidy fussed with his tie so much that Adam was about to strangle them both with it. He was trying to plan the logistics of that when he heard the doorbell.
“It’s time!” Lucy chirped as she entered the guest house. She stopped, “Wow, you…you’re just too gorgeous for your own good sweetie.”
Adam beamed. He marched over to her and lifted her into a giant hug. She hugged him back then tapped his shoulder to be put down.
“What is it with you guys all hugging up and kissing up on me?” she asked. “Are you not getting enough from each other? Jesus.”
Adam leaned and placed a delicate kiss on her forehead, “You are awesome and I love you.”
Lucy faked a swoon, “Be still my heart. The two most gorgeous men on the planet declare their love for me, yet…they’re marrying each other.” She slapped his arm, “Fuckers, the whole lot of you.”
Cassidy pulled her away laughing, “Don’t be all jealous honey. Your prince charming will show up. Maybe Adam and Kris will buy you one from a charity auction. What do you think?”
Lucy laughed, “Fuck off asshole.”
She turned to the men in the room and clapped her hands, “Ready boys?”
**
Only in Us!
Us Weekly, May 25th Edition
“The intimate ceremony in the backyard of Kris Allen and Adam Lambert took place at sunset on May 5th. Sources close to the couple reveal only a handful of guests were on the uber-selective invitation list, totaling possibly 20-30 people, including family. Catering was done by Parq, an obvious wink to where the two singers met. The wedding party was outfitted by Giorgio Armani. No honeymoon destination was revealed, but Us has learned that Tahiti, Australia or the Cayman Islands were among the choices.”
Allen-Lambert Wedding Details Revealed
People, May 23rd Edition
“The super secret May 5th wedding of Kris Allen and Adam Lambert took place in the musicians’ own backyard. The event was attended by 20 of their closest friends and family members. Superstars Allen and Lambert met three years ago from a charity auction dinner date at Parq inside the Montage Hotel in Beverly Hills. A source close to the couple revealed that the grooms and all the guests were beaming and laughing throughout the 30 minute non-denominational ceremony. Attendees were treated to a buffet dinner provided by Parq Restaurant, in an apparent nod to their first meeting, dessert by Just Desserts and music by Luna Park’s own Ruben Jackson.”
~the end~