I don’t want to lose it

2 years

It’s been 2 years since I last wrote anything. It’s been a long two years. And actually before that, it’s been a long time since I really wrote anything. Anything real. 2020 was like 3 years by itself. And being in the military, every 6 months is like a full year. I’ve grown a lot. I’m still me. Just different and older. I’ve had a lot of good ( Read more... )

I forget a lot of things. I think about even more things. I try to dream. I try to stay awake. I try to suppress. I try to express.

Year : 2019

My son was born on January 6th.
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Right now is the one year anniversary of my marriage.
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It’s been a long battle to the end. A long and difficult battle. Waiting for the paradise of coming home to you. Every single day I just think “survive this 24 hours”. Just that little bit. Day by day I survive until the light at the end gets closer. I gather up all my energy everyday and do whatever it takes. I’ll take any damage, cut any corner ( Read more... )

I’m finally getting past this part. I can’t wait. AETC has been nothing but torture. Maybe somehow I came out stronger and wiser. I definitely will be happy to leave. Knowing how stupid this was.. can I ever come back to a place like this? I can probably handle anything now. I’m beating this game and coming home to you. And my first child is coming ( Read more... )

Insomnia.
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My life in the past year has seen some of my greatest challenges and my ultimate triumphs. Come what may. I’ve used everything I could to survive. Love, hate, desperation, motivation. I’ve been guided by peers and mentors. I’m almost out of school. I have to continue to struggle out of this place with everything I have. Just two more months. These ( Read more... )