Money Can Buy You Love. And Glitter: Chapter 39
Summary: AU set approximately three years after Adam Lambert won Season 8 of American Idol. He has a successful career but after a string of failed relationships, has more or less given up on romance and is focusing on his career to the point of being a workaholic. He still has trouble with inappropriate appearances of the glambulge during performance and still loves glitter. Kris Allen is a singer/guitarist from Arkansas who moved to LA nearly two years ago to try and break into the business and get away from a small town and family life that became uncomfortable after he came out of the closet. He's just about ready to give up hope of making it into the business. He's still wearing plaid.
Rating: This chapter is PG-15.
Ship:: Adam/Kris
Story chapters:
Chapter 1: Meet cute in coffee shop Chapter 2: Car trouble Chapter 3: Geocaching? Chapter 4: Dinner and a picture
Chapter 5: Bring your boyfriend to work day Chapter 6: Date at the museum
Chapter 7: Opening the door Chapter 8: Showing the cracks Chapter 9: Cracked eggs, cracked plaster, cracked plans Chapter 10: Hunger games Chapter 11: Inspired, tested, and almost-dazzled Chapter 12: Define slutty for me
Chapter 13: Decisions, decisions Chapter 14: Of moms and meat Chapter 15: Holding on Chapter 16: Coming clean
Chapter 17: Dusty disguises and dodging the issue Chapter 18: Punked and paint
Chapter 19: This glitter is not meant for internal use Chapter 20: Home improvement
Chapter 21.1: Sharp edges and sweet tongues Chapter 21.2: Sharp edges and sweet tongues SECOND HALF
Chapter 22.1: Holding close and laying out Chapter 22.2: Holding close and laying out SECOND HALF
Chapter 23.1: Messes and make up Chapter 23.2: Messes and make up SECOND HALF
Chapter 24: Taken Chapter 25: Stuffing Chapter 25.2: Stuffing CONTINUED
Chapter 26.1: Feeling full Chapter 26.2: Second entry Chapter 27: Winning Chapter 28: Thirty-eight cents
Chapter 29: When you walked in the joint Chapter 30.1: I could tell you were a man of distinction Chapter 30.2: A real big spender Chapter 30.3: Good looking, so refined Chapter 31: Spend a little time with me
Chapter 32.1: Spend a lotta time with me Chapter 32.2: Chapter 32.3 Chapter 32.4 Chapter 32.5
Chapter 33: Well, I can do the mashed potato. Well, I can do the twist Chapter 34: Leashes, collars and cuffs! Oh my! Chapter 35: On the carpet, off the script, on the table Chapter 36.1: Consequences, unintended and otherwise
Chapter 36.2: Consequences cont'd Chapter 37: Turkey baster bukkake Chapter 38: Ball juggling
Chapter 39: The minor fall, the major lift, the baffled...
"You let them do what?"
"Hey -- it wasn't a matter of letting them do it! Like I could stop them."
"You're right. Stubborn, the two of them."
"And besides, if you couldn't whup that out of them in eighteen years or so, how would you expect me to handle it in the fifteen minutes of warning I got?" Kris asked.
"You can't change a child's essential nature," Eber said. "Believe me, parenthood teaches that lesson."
"Yeah, not a lesson my father ever learned." Kris sighed. "Whatever. They're going to be fine. "
"I'm going to end up having to bail one of them out of jail and visit the other in the hospital."
"It's not gonna be that bad. They're both working on behaving like grown ups...." Kris paused. In his opinion, Adam was being too grown up lately. Guy needed to cut loose, punch something, have a party...
"Ha. Kris..." Eber shook his head as he spoke into the phone. "I don't think the two of them have ever spent more than an hour in each other's company without verbally or physically attacking each other."
"It's gonna be fine. I know it. No bloodshed."
"I punched him in the face." Neil nodded and grinned with smug satisfaction.
"You... did what?"
"You heard me. I punched him in the face. Hard. I may have broken his nose."
"No way!"
"Way!"
"We are not doing Wayne's World--"
"Why not, we're on a road trip."
"Good point.
"Party time!"
"Excellent!"
Adam and Neil fist-pumped each other, then paused, both realizing how odd it was to actually enjoy each other's company. Neil looked away first, still shocked that when he let down his guard that he and Adam got along so well. Okay, Adam's optimism still got on his nerves, but still. Weird. He guessed his parents had been right all those years when they'd told the brothers that they could get along.
Adam smirked. They could get along, but that didn't mean he couldn't needle his brother. "See, we can get along. I knew it."
"You are so fucking annoying!" Neil groused. "You and your cock-eyed optimism."
"Well, it's true that my cock is optimistic. Every morning it opens its eye and wakes up thinking it's gonna get some."
Neil laughed. "I bet it does with the way Kris looks at you."
"He's so hot." Adam grinned as he remembered the way Kris had woken him up that very morning. And then the look in Kris' eyes when he had kissed him afterward...
"Ugh, stop it with that sappy look on your face." Neil rolled his eyes. "I'm going to vomit." He mimed gagging, then paused. "I wish I had hit Brian harder -- you know, enough to make him vomit."
"So you punched him in the nose? Really?"
"Why don't you believe me?"
"You punched Brian in the face and I didn't get a call asking to bail you out of jail or hire a lawyer to defend you in a civil suit?"
Neil frowned as he looked down at his hand. Adam loved to solve problems, but even he must get tired of being the go-to guy on occasion. And Adam had problems -- who helped him solve them? Would he even let anyone help? That must be why Kris was doing his thing on the sly. Plus Adam could have a little trust in his own brother. "Ye of little faith. I figured out how to do it."
When Neil said nothing more, but instead sat there looking first thoughtful, then smug, Adam sighed. "And are you planning to elucidate --"
"Oooh, Elucidate. I like that word. Makes me shiver."
"I figured it would. It's probably the closest thing to an orgasm you've had in the last six months."
"Very funny."
"And also true."
"Mind your own beeswax." Neil sighed loudly. "Do you want to hear my story about how I upheld the family honor? Dani being part of our family, of course."
"I'm dying to know. Just dying."
"I know you are. So I did some poking around and was unsuccessful--"
"Like I said, no orgasms for you for months."
"My god! Does everything revolve around sex?"
Adam and Neil looked at each other and laughed. "Pretty much!" They said in unison.
Neil smiled and looked out the windshield as Adam drove down the highway to San Diego. He'd actually always enjoyed hanging out with Adam and now that he'd stopped trying to be one-up his big brother with derisive commentary, Adam seemed to enjoy his company too. Even if his brother couldn't have a focused non-work conversation to save his life.
"I'm waiting." Adam poked Neil in the leg. "Spill the story of your plan. I hope it was fool-proof and not proof of foolishness."
"God, you're an old fart now that you've over thirty." Neil smirked when Adam groaned. "So I found out from some guy at Kris' bar where Brian hangs out -- some other dive bar. Of which Kris' entourage member was fairly contemptuous, because apparently in dive bar world there's some hierarchy. Amazing, isn't it -- how humans feel this need to have hierarchies no matter what?"
Adam shook his head in disagreement. "I don't think it's inherent."
"I do. I think there's a deep-seated human need to feel superior to someone. Hence why poor free whites in the pre-Civil War south supported slavery."
"Well and racism---"
"Which is just another way to feel better than someone else."
"I'd feel better if you'd tell me about this punch that's not going to require a call to my lawyer."
"Chill, dude. I've got it covered. I found out what bar he frequents and I went out there with some of my friends as back up--"
"As you, Neil Lambert? Or did you disguise yourself?"
"Of course! I grew a goatee and unlike you, don't look like a gay pirate when I do so." Neil laughed as Adam punched his arm. "Although honestly, I'm not sure he would've recognized me anyway since he was always busy making time with Dani or sucking up to you, but I wasn't taking any chances. I have to admit, it did somewhat lessen the enjoyment of standing over him, with him not knowing who I was."
"Hmm. Priorities, I suppose."
"Exactly. You can't have everything in life, so choose what's important."
"You sound like Dad!" Adam exclaimed in shock.
Neil froze. "Or you. Ugh. We're turning into Dad."
"Well, he was a good dad."
"The best. So it's not a bad thing, with you becoming a dad yourself," Neil pointed out, shocked himself when Adam only nodded thoughtfully. He stared, then looked forward again, nodding. Of course. They were on their way to San Diego, him ostensibly to visit old friends but really wanting to spend some one-on-one time with his brother -- that being hard to come by in LA. And Adam... he'd said openly he wanted to visit their father for some paternal advice. So weird... the idea of his brother being a dad himself. "Speaking of which, the sperm donor."
"Speaking of which, you went into a bar with friends. So you said. So I have to ask -- you have friends in LA?"
"Okay. Brad and Tommy."
"Brad walked into a dive bar?" Adam burst out laughing. "That sounds like the beginning of a really bad joke. What was he wearing?"
"He...uh... decided to dress like Kris. I think he may have actually quote unquote borrowed one of Kris' plaid shirts, to be honest."
"The white one with brown lines?" Adam asked, then laughed. "Kris has been going crazy looking for that damn shirt. He's going to be so mad. Do you have pictures?"
"Well, actually Brad videotaped it. He pretended to be some kind of film student or... well, I don't even know. He talked really fast and looked really innocent. The bartender asked to see his proof of age -- which made him really happy and even more talkative. Everyone just stared at him in bemusement and then shrugged."
"Good plan. Distract and then move in for the kill?"
"Exactly."
"And what was Tommy's role in this grand plan?"
"He seemed to think it was flirting with the rather grubby cocktail waitress. Occasionally alternating with leaning against the bar and smirking at me."
Adam laughed. "Wait, how was he dressed?"
"If it's not sex, it's clothes?" Neil shook his head. "Can't you ever just let me tell a story my way?"
"My way is better." Adam looked over at Neil with a bland expression. When Neil didn't snatch the bait with impatience and aggravation, he added, "It always is."
Neil stared back, then nodded. "Yeah, you're trying to get me going. Not gonna work."
"But I neeeeeeeeeeeeeed to picture it," Adam whined. "I neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed...."
"Shut the fuck up with the whining. You know what? I cannot wait until you're a father and your kid pulls this crap on you."
"Ugh. It's karma, isn't it?" Adam straightened and nodded. "Go on, tell your story."
"Okay. So Tommy used some kind of, I don't know, hair dye rinse or rather, Brad used it on him."
"Oh hell, I missed all this?"
"You're a busy man and Brian would have recognized you instantly." Neil shrugged. "We wanted to do our part. So Brad dyed Tommy's hair this color I'll call dirt and he wore some metal tee-shirt, raggedy jeans and some shit-kicker boots. A baseball cap. Just like mine."
"Okay, so you guys had an adventure! With hair dye and costumes!" Adam realized. He pouted. "And I was left out."
"Let me have some spotlight for once!" Neil teased. "Besides, bro -- you don't blend in with the crowd. Even with a baseball cap."
Adam nodded. "So tell me how you did it."
'Well, it started when I found out that Brian's dive bar caters to ex-pats from New York. His family is originally from Brooklyn."
"What?"
"Yeah, he had this whole other life. And that's where his weakness lay." Neil grinned when Adam looked at him quizzically. "And that's where I had some knowledge you didn't."
"You have lots of knowledge I don't," Adam said quickly and honestly. "You're the smartest person I know."
"And you're the prettiest, so we're even." Neil winked. "So here's what I learned. People tend to gravitate to ex-pat bars around sports. Sports, Adam."
"Oh. I know nothing."
"My god, the world has stopped turning on its axis! My brother admits he knows nothing about something."
"But I know plenty of something about nothing. There's probably a lyric in that..." Adam mused, making a mental note.
"I.. I don't even... Whatever!" Neil shook his head. "So. Sports. New Yorkers... baseball...? Get it?"
Adam thought, then shook his head. "And I've still got nothing."
"Do you never listen when we go back to visit Mom's family and they're carrying on about baseball?"
"No. I pretend and nod occasionally, but I'm usually thinking about music."
"I knew it!" Neil threw up his hands. "One track mind."
"You just said all I think about is sex and clothes."
"Okay, your puny little brain can also handle a third item. The glorious Adam trilogy of music, sex, and clothes. Not necessarily in that order."
"Can you possibly tell this story in an order? Any order? Focus."
"Arrgggh!" Neil ground his teeth. "So, as I said -- sports. New Yorkers take baseball very seriously. Especially Yankee fans. Of which Brian is one. And in the interests of finishing this story before we hit San Diego--"
"How long is it? We just passed Del Mar!"
"As I said before you rudely interrupted me..." Neil ground his teeth. No one could yank his chain like Adam. "Yankee fans don't like the Mets -- da bums -- but more than that, more than anything, they loathe and hate with a passion the Red Sox."
Adam nodded. "Got it. New York Yankee fans hate the Red Sox from... Oh, I know. Reading, Pennsylvania. The Reading Red Sox."
"No! Boston."
"But that's not alliterative."
"It doesn't have to be." Neil looked over at his brother and resisted the urge to strangle him. "I'm only not hurting you because you're driving."
"Strategic move on my part. Maybe I do have some brains." Adam shrugged. "So let me guess -- you and Tommy were wearing Red Sox caps?"
"Exactly. And I just kept taunting him, verbally. You know how I do it--" Neil paused when Adam snorted. "So I used all the skills I developed by torturing you over the years on Brian. And you know what?"
"You have a strong skill set at pissing people off to the point where they want to punch you in the mouth?"
"Exactly. So I just kept talking and then Tommy chimed in -- when he could squeeze it in between smirking and flirting and lo and behold, Brian took a swing at me. Which I allowed to clip me on the chin."
"So you could swing back and it was self defense. Except you hit harder."
"Exactly."
"Brilliant." Adam frowned. He was jealous. Damn, what he wouldn't have given to punch that asshole in the face. Blood would have been good to see. "I hope you made him bleed."
"Noses have that tendency. I always told you I was the smart one."
"That's fair. One of has to be smart and one of has to be pretty. And popular. And--"
"Shut up." Neil laughed and flicked the side of Adam's head.
"WAIT. OMG. Why am I just now hearing about this?"
"I bribed them to keep quiet. I...um... may have promised a huge party at your house."
"You promised them a party at my house?"
"Oh get over it. You love to have parties. You're like a glamrock Martha Stewart or something."
"Except for the fact that I can't cook."
"Small details. Sheesh. Big picture, bro. Big picture."
"What is a parent's first job?" Eber asked softly as he and Adam ate Mexican at a restaurant in the Old town section of San Diego. Adam had asked to talk and that's what they'd been doing for the last two hours, until hunger set in and then Adam kept talking anyway, determined to talk through his anxiety.
Adam aimlessly rolled the edge of a tortilla between his fingers. Trick question, no doubt. Well, might as well throw it out. "To love the kid?"
"Good answer, but wrong. Your first job as a parent is to protect. That comes first. Protection." Eber waited while Adam nodded. Adam was by nature protective of the people he loved, so this should be easy.
"Sure. I see. That's why Mom freaked out when she saw that apartment I lived in when I first moved to LA."
"She wasn't the only one." Eber shuddered. "I still occasionally have nightmares about roaches climbing on you in your sleep."
"And what you're saying is that unless we find a way to control Brian, he'll be like those roaches. Coming out of the woodwork..." Adam nodded as he shoved the sour cream toward his father. Too man calories when he wasn't really tasting anything anyway.
"Based upon everything you and Dani and Neil and Kris and your mother has said about him, yes." Eber paused and took a sip of his margarita. "We all know people who have had exes who made their lives a living hell using kids as the weapon. I'm sure any of them would have happily paid money to get rid of them, to lead a better life."
"I know that." Adam sighed. "I'm being selfish, I guess. I will pay him off, but I hate to do it. It's not the money, I can afford it. It's the principle of the thing. I hate doing it. I won't say that to Dani, but... I'm horrible, aren't I?"
"That's not selfish. That's honest. And who'd leap at the chance to give scum what they want? Nobody. But it's the best solution. We all have to do things we don't like. The test is whether we do them or not."
"I'll do it, but I feel like I'm losing."
"Just money." Eber held up his hand when Adam shook his head. "No, listen. Really, all you're losing is money and oh. I get it. You're not in control. And you can't make this situation perfect." He patted Adam on the back. "Well, get used to it. Parenthood..." He laughed. "There's precious little control there. And right now? There is no perfect win in this situation. There is no way to get everything you want. So you need to set priorities. Given the situation, what is your highest priority?" Adam already knew the answer and would do it without hesitation, Eber knew. He just needed to vent about it to someone safe. He smiled. It was an honor to be your kid's safe place.
Adam closed his eyes. "To enable Dani and the baby to be as happy as possible."
"Exactly. Now what is the choice with the greatest likelihood of that being the result?"
"Getting rid of Brian. He really would be one of those assholes who uses the kid as a pawn, uncaring of any damage he does to the child, just to get more money or for the hell of it or to spite Dani. Or me." Adam sighed and rubbed his face. "I know I have to do it. And I'm glad Neil punched him the in face because someone should. I guess I'm just whining that I didn't get to do it."
"Don't really blame you, son. It's okay to whine and vent. It's better than internalizing all of it. That's not healthy."
Adam nodded, grateful that his father understood. "I know what to do. I'll do it. I'll pay him off, even if it's the wrong thing to do from a principled point of view. I'll do it. I know that sometimes the choice in life is to be right or to be happy."
"That's a lesson I only really learned thanks to being a father," Eber admitted.
"You will not!" Neil Allen ordered his wife, who'd rushed after Cale the minute the church service was over and caught up with him in the parking lot. "You will not contact Kris. He's turned his back on the righteous path and we won't see or talk to him until he turns back. I'd rather we not talk of him at all."
"You will not tell me that I cannot even speak of my son!" Kim argued, hands on her hips, ignoring the avidly curious stares of the other parishioners making their way to their cars after Sunday services.
"I don't know why this all started..." Neil began, shaking his head.
"Because." Kim Allen reached out and held onto Cale's arm when he would have snuck away. "I saw him on the Oscars red carpet! He's still Kris. Just... more so."
"More disgusting! Those jokes were an embarrassment to us and before God."
"He was just joking the way young guys do. He's still our son! I know my son--"
"No, you don't. And neither do I. We know nothing of him. He was able to hide the sinner he was for so many years. Living in my house, eating at my table, sleeping in my bed--"
"Last I knew, Neil Allen, it's my house too and given that I'm the one making the food on that table--"
"Which he ate, while screwing around with men!' Neil glared. "If he'd channeled the energy from that perversity into his music, he coulda been playing at Branson by now!"
"He didn't want to play at Branson!" Cale interjected. "Kris doesn't much like country. Honestly, how can you not know that?"
Kim glanced at Cale's incredulous face, which mirrored her own feelings. How could Neil not know that? Or care? It wasn't a big deal, no marker of salvation to like country music, so why didn't he know that fact? Did he not know Kris at all? Did he not care about knowing Kris at all? Was it all about making a son in his own image, rather than encouraging him to reflect his own choices and... Oh.
Clenching his jaw as Neil Allen ranted on in the church parking lot, Cale shoved his fist into his pocket. He would not punch Neil Allen in the nose. He would not. If he ever got his ass in gear to move out to LA, one huge plus was going to be NOT seeing Neil Allen on a daily basis. Even if he wasn't bitching about Kris, he was bitching about something. Guy was not a fucking ray of sunshine, that's for sure. He tuned back in as Neil began to talk about Kris's music. Interesting thing, that. Neil actually did think his son was a talented musician to the point where he had unrealistic ideas of how easy it should've been for Kris to make it big.
"It's really hard to make it in music in the real business," Cale said tightly. "LA isn't Conway. There's a ton of guitar players for every job."
"Which is why getting your ass off of the couch and pounding the pavement is crucial. As we all know, Kris isn't the most motivated person. Which is why we never heard from him after he moved out there -- if he'd really tried, he'd be a big name by now. So he must not've tried."
"He about killed himself when he first moved out there, trying to make it!" Cale defended Kris. "Sometimes you can work your hardest and do your best, but still not make it. Lookit all the high school football heroes who don't even get to start when they get to college -- not everyone can start!"
"No, not everyone can -- that's why you have to be better than everyone else."
"Well, he's already doing better than most, because he's got a gig at a coffee house. He could've actually worked more..." Cale stopped and made a note to shoot himself in the head when he got home.
Neil sneered. "But let me guess, he turned down the opportunity. Lazy bum."
Frowning, Cale explained, "He wants to find out what he wants. He works hard. He's not sitting on his ass--"
"I bet he's not," Neil scoffed. "He's using his ass for something else than finding work. Then again, maybe his ass is his work."
"Okay, that's enough." Cale snapped, slicing his hand through the air abruptly.
"Yes, it is, Neil Allen," a quavering voice snapped from behind them.
They all stepped back as the ancient woman who'd been high school principal for more years than anyone could remember glared at Neil Allen.
"Ma'am." Kim nodded and cleared her throat. Not only was Mrs. Phipps the retired high school principal and the current school board president, more importantly, she was head of the women's guild at church, which meant she was the most powerful woman Kim knew in town. "How are you doing today?"
"Miz Phipps..." Cale smiled. He'd always liked the old lady. She had a dry sense of humor.
"Kim. Cale." Mrs. Phipps turned, keeping one hand on her cane and the other on her over-sized purse. "Neil, don't make me hit you with my purse. It would feel good, so I'd like to withstand that temptation. Then again, at my age, I don't know why I should resist temptation any more." She paused and stared at Cale as he choked back his snickers.
"Sorry, ma'am." Cale nodded and ducked his head to hide his smile.
"You're fine, Cale." Mrs. Phipps shoved her purse at Neil's stomach and smiled as he winced. "I've lived longer than you have, long enough to say lots of changes happening. But what doesn't change and why I give the same commencement address every year, is human nature and human needs. In case you've forgotten, Neil Allen, I'll remind you what I said at your high school graduation and at each of your sons -- yes, Kris is still your son. The most important advice I can give any of you, no matter what the decade, is that happiness is not over-rated. You think about what it takes to be happy and do it."
"Having a good time?" Brad asked, pausing his dancing to pull Adam away from the portable dvd player on which the footage of Neil popping Brian was playing. Dani had told him to keep Adam circulating tonight as he was still being "broody", whatever that meant. He thought Adam was just thinking through the huge change coming up. Or his EP. Or his tour. Guy did have a lot on his mind.
"Yeah, actually. I could watch this a hundred times and still find it funny. But you'd better give that shirt back to Kris or he's likely to pop you one," Adam warned.
"I know!" Brad tsked. "I didn't know it was his favorite. Don't worry, it's safely back in the closet, ironed, even, possibly for the first time in its misbegotten life. By the way. Did you know the boy has a wide assortment of edible glitter in there?"
"I might." Adam rolled his eyes, then glared. "And why were you snooping?"
"Ha. It's hardly snooping when it's laying right on top of the dresser." Brad tapped Adam's arm. "Y'all are going to have to be more careful with the toys when you have little munchkins around the house."
"You mean like locking valuables away from snoops like you? I swear, Kris will put a lock on his closet now. To protect plaid!"
"Be serious. How often would I want to dress like that?" Brad shuddered. "Hey, you're not gonna dress like some old fart from Palm Springs now that you're gonna be a dad, are you?"
"My turn to shudder." Adam shook his head as he caught Kris as he danced by and pulled him close.
"I always knew..." Brad smiled as Kris snuggled into Adam's chest, pulled his tee-shirt aside and began kissing Adam's collarbone. Kris must've had a few beers. And watching Adam pull Kris even closer to kiss his head, Brad thought Kris was probably better at distracting Adam than anyone else. "That's one reason why Kris is a better match for you than I was."
"You always knew I would what?" Adam questioned.
"Why am I a better match?" Kris looked up from where he'd been kissing Adam's neck.
"Because you want to be a father, the way Adam should be." Pointing at Adam, Brad added, "I knew you'd be a dad and a good one too. You weren't thinking about it back in the day, but it's in you. Here." Brad touched Adam's chest, laughing as Kris immediately brushed his hand away. "I always knew you'd be fulfilled with three things."
"Finally, he tells!" Kris interjected as Neil, Lee Cherry and Monte walked up. "I've been waiting two years to hear this answer."
"Let me guess. Sex, fashion and music?" Neil guessed.
"Nope."
"Hmm.." Monte stroked his beard. "I'd say, music, sex and ice cream."
"Oh." Brad frowned. "I forgot about the ice cream. Ice cream is huge with Adam--"
"If you don't tell me, I'm gonna hold you down inside a vat of ice cream," Kris warned, hurrying to speak before Adam could make a derogatory remark about himself becoming huge thanks to ice cream.
"How about sex, music and flaming headdresses?" Lee teased.
"One of these days, I'm getting my flaming headdress!" Adam announced.
"No, you're not!" The other men exclaimed.
Kris shook his head. "Then again, Brad could test out the prototype. In fact, I'll hold his head nice and tight while you strap that sucker on."
"Are we still talking about headdresses?" Brad winked.
Grinning, Kris retorted, "You tell me -- do you need to strap on something? Is what God gave you not good enough? I knew it! Ha!"
Laughing, Adam hugged both Kris and Brad. "Thanks. I needed that. Good idea to have this party."
"You work too hard. Balance, my friend." Monte slapped Adam on the back. "You need to spend more time with your people here." He gestured around the large back yard, full of the people Adam had gathered into his own family.
"You're right. I've been trying to find all the answers myself."
Neil poked Adam's arm. "When you have so many of us willing to give you a--"
"Hard time?" Adam punched his brother's arm.
"But sweetie..." Kris pulled Adam back over to the table under the patio overhang, where everyone else had gathered. "You're not in this alone, not any of it. And we're gonna show you."
"I don't understand..." Adam said honestly as Kris pushed him down into one of the chaise lounges and then promptly sat on his lap and thank all the gods, wiggled. "Wellll... I understand that." He grinned and wrapped one arm around Kris and held him close, kissing his neck.
"Later!" Dani laughed as she stood up and handed Adam an envelope.
"What's this?" Adam asked curiously as he opened the envelope. Seeing a cashier's check, he frowned in confusion. "What is this about?"
"We're in this together," Kris began to explain. "We didn't want you to do this alone."
"And besides." Dani bit her lip, then continued. "It was my stupid mistake, my stupid choice to be with Brian that got us into this mess. I couldn't let you make the payment all on your own and I...." She took a deep breath and willed herself not to cry.
Alisan squeezed Dani's hand and picked up the story. "So Kris suggested that we all make a contribution. We know it's not a lot, but it is from all of us, so you know -- both you and Dani -- that we--"
"This family we've made," Scarlett interjected. "We're all in this together. We're standing together."
"I... I'm actually speechless," Adam admitted, staring in shock at the envelope. It wasn't necessary and he opened his mouth to refuse the check but caught his mother's warning glance. Oh. Better not. But still, he didn't need the money, it wasn't about money.. He looked up at the crowd of people around the patio ranging from old friends to newer ones from Dani's parents to his own parents to Geoffrey and his second wife that he'd bet would soon be his wife again to Lane and Kris. Everyone he loved most was right here and they were showing their commitment to their ersatz family.
"I was wrong before!" Brad announced. "Now the world has stopped spinning on its axis."
"Shaddup!" Kris tossed a balled-up napkin at Brad. "I meant that in a nice way, of course."
"Of course," everyone echoed.
"I..." Adam held up his hand. "Thank you. It's not necessary, but I deeply appreciate the thought and concern. I guess I need reminders from time to time that I don't have to control everything or solve every problem on my own."
"Being a father will teach that lesson like no other," Monte pointed out. "Believe me, you can't do that on your own."
"Thanks. I'll learn a lot of lessons, I suppose. Damn, I don't want to screw it up," Adam admitted.
"We all screw it up," Lee told him. "But truthfully, it's the people who worry about being a good parent who are good parents. The folks who don't care and assume they're great are the ones who really screw up."
"And don't worry!" Neil called out. "We all will tell you if you screw up. Believe me, I've been waiting for that moment for years! I'll be totally helpful."
"So we can count on you all to help with projectile vomit?" Dani asked with a grin.
"Projectile..." Adam gulped.
"Vomit?" Neil gulped. "No, no. I'm sure you two and Kris -- perfect Kris -- will handle that perfectly without my help!"
"I'm notthat perfect!" Kris protested. "Nope, not at all!"
"Damn, your ass is perfect...." Adam whispered sleepily as he cupped that ass in his hands while Kris sagged heavily on his chest, Kris' legs sprawled on either side of his hips, panting in the aftermath.
"I should clean up..." Kris whispered back, turning his head to kiss a string of soft kisses on Adam from one shoulder to another.
Rubbing his cheek against the top of Kris' head, Adam coaxed, "No, stay a minute. Stay connected a minute longer. Feel like..." Adam sighed and closed his eyes. "Feel like I'm rushing around so much, need..."
Kris lifted his head slowly and smiled as Adam's eyes closed, he gave a soft sigh and just like that, was asleep. Slowly and carefully lifting himself, he padded as quietly as he could into the bathroom for a washcloth. Back in the bedroom, he hesitated, then gingerly wiped Adam up, hissing an annoyed breath as Adam's eyes opened.
"Dani, mom and Lane are coming over..." Adam said, moving automatically to get up.
"No. Stay. I mean it." Kris pushed back on Adam's chest. "Lane can rearrange your morning a little so you can oh-I-dunno-fucking-sleep?"
His lips quirking up in a small smile, Adam blinked up at Kris. "Oooh, bossy Kris."
"I know, doesn't happen too often, but when it does?"
"I usually get fucked." Adam wiggled his eyebrows.
Kris cracked up. "Ha. You're so tired, I might actually manage to do it this time without instructions..."
"I don't instruct. I suggest." Adam smirked, then to his own chagrin, broke into a yawn.
"Well, my bossiness this time..." Kris broke off as Adam slid his hand between his own legs and began -- "Oh, no, stop that!" Kris called out, dropping the cloth to scramble for the covers, pulling them up and over Adam. "None of that! You need to sleep." He held his breath and then exhaled when Adam frowned, then nodded, before closing his eyes.
"Love you..." Kris whispered as he bent and kissed Adam's soft lips. He rushed back into the bathroom, hurrying through his shower and dressing, before checking Adam one last time before descending down the stairs just as he heard a knock on the door.
Opening it cautiously, Kris smiled when he saw Dani and pulled her inside. "I'll make some breakfast. C'mon. Is there anything that upsets your tummy?"
"Fruit, believe it or not. Adam -- Is he asleep?" Dani asked.
"I made sure of it." Kris smirked.
"Tired him out, did ya?" Dani smirked back. "Good for you. Boy is pushing himself too hard."
"Tell me about it," Kris began, than cocked his head as he listened. "They're here." He raced to the front door as a second soft knock on the door sounded. "Got it!" He called out softly as he opened the door to Leila and Lane.
"Good, it's a little chilly out there," Leila commented, shivering as she stepped inside.
"You southern Californians. This is practically balmy!" Lane teased. As she walked in, she bopped Kris on the nose. "Once again, I did not use my security codes. That incident with the refrigerator is still emblazoned on my mind."
"Good lord, that was nearly two years ago!" Kris teased back. "But then again, the glambulge is worth remembering." Lord knew, his ass still remembered. A good kind of ache.
"Don't need to hear this!" Leila said, teasingly putting her fingers in her ears.
"Let's go into the kitchen and I'll make breakfast," Kris offered. He pointed up the stairs. "Adam's actually asleep. Thankfully. He didn't get into bed until almost three am, working on the EP."
"He's working too hard," Leila worried as they all went into the kitchen.
Lane nodded. "I agree. And so does Geoffrey. Do I smell bread?"
"And I've added to his stress," Dani said softly.
"It's not you -- we're all excited about the baby," Kris reminded her as he pulled out pans and Leila opened the refrigerator and choose food. "It's Brian."
"And I'd wager it's not about Brian being an asshole so much as Adam not being in control." Leila pushed the eggs toward Kris and smiled as she pointed at the breadmaker. "Glad you're using it."
"Of course." Kris smiled. He didn't use the breadmaker often since he really wasn't that great of a cook in his opinion and Adam wasn't big on carbs, although how the guy was able to pass up biscuits, he didn't understand, but he did use it whenever Leila came over for a meal. Only polite to use the gifts people gave you. "So Lane, Leila - Dani and I were thinking about giving Adam a gift."
"Yeah. I know Adam is upset, but I also know that it's not about the money," Dani began. "But we can't make it -- Brian, go away. Believe me, I've racked my brain trying to think of ways."
"We all have," Leila agreed.
Lane nodded as she sniffed around the breadmaker. "And Adam's lawyers indicated that although we could try and get him on extortion, that would not prevent Brian from trying to assert parental rights in family court later on. Sick and wrong, but true and legal. So the best option is to make him go away."
"But I want to do my part in making him go away," Dani asserted. "And our friends, my parents do too. So Kris and I were talking about the idea of giving Adam a, well..." She stopped.
"Money. Giving Adam money to help get rid of Brian." Kris stopped when he saw the skepticism on Leila's face. "I know, Adam will refuse money, but it's not really the gift of money. It's like when the fire department has a fund-raiser because someone needs help paying medical bills, what the family really remembers is how the community supported them. So we were thinking..." Kris pointed at Dani.
Dani nodded. "We were thinking of talking to our family-- our big family -- and asking people if they wanted to contribute, even a teeny bit, just so that Adam would feel supported. I just feel like we all have benefited from his generosity and we should--" She froze, then clamped a hand over her mouth and ran for the bathroom.
Lane called out, "Adam singlehandedly supports quite a few of us in sum or part. It's our turn to return the favor."
"So you joined the three musketeers in working on the problem called Brian..." Adam smiled at Lane and Dani on either side of him as they finished their story, while watching Kris and Brad have an apparent argument about plaid from across the patio. He smiled. "I probably could make myself miserable about you all conspiring behind my back or..."
"You could just be happy about the fact that you have people who love you and Dani who want to help you," Lane suggested briskly.
"You sound like my dad." Adam nodded and took a deep breath. It was all good. He didn't have to solve every problem himself. Surprises could be good things. After all, meeting Kris that day in Starbucks had been a surprise. Dani having a baby had been a surprise. But both were gifts, beautiful gifts.
"Do you want me to take care of that check for you?" Lane asked.
"Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks." Adam smiled and handed the envelope over. "Deposit it in that account, the new one?"
Adam held Lane's eyes until she nodded her understanding that the money should go into what he called the kid account, the one he intended to put in trust until the kid turned twenty-one. Or considering his bonehead moves at that age, maybe thirty-one.
"Just so you know, a good bit of that is from Kris," Dani whispered. "I thought you should know---" She stopped abruptly when Tommy pulled her out to the dance floor, laughingly complaining about needing to use the bathroom first.
"How did Kris..." Adam tapped Lane's bag as he looked at her.
"I think he borrowed some money from Geoffrey, but don't tell him I told you. Don't let on you know!" Lane ordered. "Let him have some --"
"Pride." Adam nodded. "He still carries on sometimes about paying half the rent."
"I know." Lane smiled smugly. "He wants to feel like he's making an equal contribution to the household."
"So...How did you know about this, oh Super Snoop?"
Lane held up her hand. "I wasn't snooping. I inadvertently overheard a conversation. Or Kris' side of it anyway."
""Hey, Geoffrey. I was uh wondering... I know, just spit it out, you're busy. Could you uh advance me some.... Yes, money. Could you advance me... Yes, I'm good for it. You know I'm not goin' anywhere. I found my place, my people, my... Adam. You know it... Oh, for Dani. To get rid of Asshole.... Yeah, good cause... No, you don't have to... I know! I get it. Beggars can't be choosers. Low blow... Oh, sorry. Jumped... Yeah, that's why Adam calls me Hedgehog.... Thanks. I'll uphold my end of it. ... Yeah. thanks."
"So Geoffrey contributed too?" Adam shook his head. "I don't always understand that guy."
Lane shrugged. "What's to understand? He considers himself not just your manager, but a friend. And he seems to consider Kris somewhat like the son he never had. Tight bonds -- which you seem to want to resist with him. Why is that?"
"My dad always warned me about mixing personal relationships with business at that level." Adam held both hands, palm up. "Let's be honest. If I stop making him money, he'll drop me. It's not wise, therefore, to get emotionally invested."
"Oh, really?" Lane arched an eyebrow. "That's why you went to the trouble of tracking down the famous second wife -- the one who got away -- and talked her into coming to a party and giving Geoffrey a second chance? Because you're keeping it just business between you two?"
"Oooh, snap!" Adam laughed, then sighed happily when Kris' arms encircled his shoulders from behind.
"Hey, sweetie..." Kris trailed his finger down Adam's neck and over his chest, laughing when Adam caught his hand and held onto it tightly. "So Brad paid me rent."
"Rent for what?" Lane asked, smiling as Adam tugged on Kris' hands and pulled him around to sit on his lap.
"Borrowing my shirt." Using his free hand, Kris dug into his pocket and pulled out three small tubes. "He found some new flavors of edible glitter. I'm thinkin' maybe I like that guy."
"He never told you the third thing, you know," Adam pointed out.
Kris sat up and began to get up, then wiggled back into his place on Adam's lap. "Eh, forget it."
Lane and Adam gaped at Kris. "No hedgehog?" Lane asked in surprise.
"Nah. He can play his little games. FIrst off, I bet I know what the third thing was -- you being a dad. Second off -- I have way better games to play..." Kris wiggled slowly, then rocked on Adam's lap and watched Adam's eyes glaze over. "Oh yeah, like that. So later tonight, he can be all smug thinking he got one over on me, but I'll be licking edible glitter off the hottest guy on the planet..." He rocked again and laughed. "As you arise to the occasion. I win."
TBC Chapter 40.1: Walking the Shar-Peis of life