The firefighters are here again... Must I add- I love off season ( Read more... )

1 pound down.

Take that ugly fat cells!

Ha ha, I might just have fun with this :)

Today ended on a weird note...

I've lost my smile and spunk...

I even tried hard tonight to let it all go with chocolate and music and friends and movies and... I think I do just need to give into the tears.

I'm so far behind in school work... gah... and then life crap and tons of work in general...

Meh- just in the mood to curl up and nap and cry and... why have I been so emotional?

I'm in a weird place tonight...

Lonely.

I think I'm having a mental breakdown...

So I'll go to the gym and try to forget it all.

Someday I just want someone to think I'm beautiful or hot and just want me.

It sounds shallow and what not- but it would be nice... oh well.

Started my diet again and 1 lb. down...

(I gained back 5... which is about 10 for someone who is 5'2" so I'm working on it)

but off to the gym to fight it all!

I was even a nerd and took before pictures... so in 10-15 pounds dropped I can compare...

Someday someone will want me...

The sad thing being all of the truly amazing ones, I've pushed away... Why am I so stupid?

I just hope I didn't fuck up things tonight...