well im all confused again

[ce_love]

im all confused again and i dont know what to do. i feel like shit cause as i thought things were getting better things just got worse. mr. king is finally starting to chage jsut as i think that im falling back in love with mark. why oh why cant things be simple why oh why do things always come down to how i feel about mark or how i feel about mr.

Comments

Hey buddy

[xxenvyxx42]

I used to cut myself off from people. I realized that i am too much of a literal person for that because with out people i got so depressed i started to cut myself. I guess to punish myself. You tend to punish the ones closest to you and without anyone thats what happend to me. As bad as it gets [you read my entries . . always me complaining]
It is always one of the few people that you have left to help you get back on your feet. It may not happen right away but it happens eventually. Hang in there and give me a call i get lonely too. =)
love ya,
Tal

Re: Hey buddy

[ce_love]

thank you
i was at that point inmy life at one point myself where i felt like the last result was that since i cant hurt my friends cause i care too much about them i have to hurt myself cause i was the reason things were happening the wasy they were but because of some serious intervention by a few really good friends i no longer do that but the problem i have is those friends are no longer here. all the people i can turley say know me and have really been there for me are about 500 miles away where i used to stay so i cant lean on them for support any more. but i think it will be good for me to cut everyone off just at leat for a while just to try it and see if i can make it but if i cant then i wont cause like i said i dont really understand whats going on in my mind and i need free time to think but i will def. think of what you said and will give you a call soon. really busy with catching up with school right now and work so it may be a few days but ill call.