It's about discipline.
I need to start setting realistic goals and dreams.

Last night all of those terrible feelings that I had not felt in such a long time came rushing back. My body felt unable to move, trembling, I could not stand to look in his eyes. I was lost. It's in a name, that name.

A new year, a new you. I can't believe that 2010 is coming to an end. I feel that 2011 will be my year.

I want to feel free. I want to explore. I want to do something I would have never dreamed of doing.

I've missed talking to you.

I wish that I could stop thinking such terrible things about him. I want to be able to trust him, fully, again. He's the only one for me, the only one I want to be with, and the only one I ever want to love as much as I do. But, I still feel anxcious, worried, and as if he is betraying me again ( Read more... )

I haven't been liking myself much lately.
I don't feel like me. I don't like this person that I am. I pull my skin away from my body and wish that I could tear it off. I let people get the best of me. I let them build me up and then destroy me. I just wish to be someone completely different.

I am trying to not get so emotional over the small stuff. It's hard, however, because a part of me is still torn. It's simple: He's the one I want to be with for the rest of my life, and we have to keep moving forward, not backwards ( Read more... )

Nevermind, I can't be with someone like him. I deserve so much better.

I really have given everything to him. And I really don't believe I have anything else to give. He says stop giving, and let him do the giving instead. But, it's in my nature to give because I want to give him the world and more. I guess it isn't natural for him though, proving me correct once more that I am running a one way relationship. He ( Read more... )