The strangest thing about "growing up" is not feeling like you're doing so. Shouldn't that be a good thing? Maybe, maybe not. I tend towards not, because as I've said before I'm fine with aging. Nevertheless, when all your friends are getting married and popping out bright bouncing babies it definitely gives you that weird feeling. I'm not ( Read more... )

I learned an important life lesson yesterday. Several times.

If a city is lovingly nicknamed "The Windy City", try not to wear a billowy skirt.

I'm up early due to being woken up by one UPS man. I love packages! But it turns out it was just deposit slips from the bank. Is it really necessary for those to be sent UPS? Is it? Godamnit don't wake me up for that ( Read more... )

Contents ( Read more... )

I think one of the best thing about working nights is that I can have a glass of wine at 8am and shrug it off by saying, "Hey. This is night for ME." And when that one glass turns to an entire bottle I can shrug it off by saying, "Heeeeeeey man, howsh it goin'? Your... they... you rock man. You, schut up, no you rock mans! Yeaaaah. No. I'm fine. I' ( Read more... )

So one dazy, lazy [high]school night years ago I was drinking a chai latte, or some similarly delicious and pretentious drink, at a local bookstore with this absurdly jewish boy I was "seeing" at the time. (As an aside, I used to think I had a thing for the Jews. In reality, I am quite anti-semitic, because I hold it against the Jews for creating ( Read more... )

"I've heard these stories of when Steven Spielberg was making "Schindler's List" ? he had to call Robin Williams every day to talk him down after the day's shoot. We had so much fun making this film that when we were done shooting I had to call somebody to be reminded of the Holocaust just to bring me back down."
-Paul Rudd

Have you ever woken up from a dream because you were just dead scared of what was coming next ( Read more... )

I've been thinking lately about funny. The subject of this post may be somewhat misleading. I don't have a desire to dissect what goes into making a joke. In fact, I really would probably be the wrong person to ask about that altogether. No, rather I wanted to say that jokes are funny. Not jokes as in the end result, but the making of a joke ( Read more... )

So I was thinking about my top five list. By that I mean the list of five celebrities that I can claim sexual amnesty for, because I mean... you're not going to get the chance, but if you do it's understandable for you to tak the plunge.

Anyway my list is as follows (last to first):

5. Five is currently open. I'm not a total slut.

4. Kevin ( Read more... )