006

[checkoutpandora]

 [In the most droll tone ever]

Hope everyone didn't forget their copies of the Zombie Survival Handbook.

[And then, cheerfully.]

But for all you "brave" souls out there that just have to go out and poke things and ignore every basic horror movie rule ever, here's a little mood music for you.

[And you thought the background music is over, but no.

Comments

[hardcorecute]

[Oh, so seriously.]

I didn't get a handbook, Gabriel.

[checkoutpandora]

I'd avoid the creepy zombie-filled city then, sweetheart.

[blind_memories]

From all the people getting bitten, I guess we should have handed out more pamphlets. I'm staying where it's safe for now.

[but he sighs contently, closing blind eyes to listen to the music]

Music to Get Bitten To, hm?

[checkoutpandora]

See? If the Animus had given us a little warning before this one, I would've ran down the entire list of horror movie rules, but now? Now, we're probably all gonna die.

Unless our overlords grant us a fully stocked mall.

[blind_memories]

I would kill someone to get access to a mall right now. Never mind finding things to kill zombies with, I want some jeans. And a fucking iPod charger.

I've never technically seen a zombie movie, but I've managed not to get turned into zombie food so far. Just have to know where to stay.

[checkoutpandora]

I'd cry for your poor teenage soul, but angels are kinda Chuck Norris when it comes to tears.

But bravo, kid. That officially makes you smarter than, oh, I'll say 40% of this town? That might be too generous.

[Video]

[siriuslymagical]

[Have zombie bite victim!Sirius who is clinging to his sanity at this point and looks very sick.]

Fuck off.

[Video]

[checkoutpandora]

That's what you get for sticking your fingers too close to their mouths, kid.

[Video]

[siriuslymagical]

Wasn't like I was standing out there yelling at them to take a chunk out of my arm.

[Video]

[checkoutpandora]

They're zombies, kid. Not ninjas. Unless your life really sucks and you actually got ninja zombies.

[Video]

[marsfireignite]

You are the least helpful person in this city.

[Irritably.

... it's a lie, of course, but whatever.]

[Video]

[checkoutpandora]

Blame the Animus. I had a whole speech prepared, but then they didn't give us any creepy warnings so I had to improvise. So sue me for having too much faith in humanity. I thought maybe a few people would get bitten. I didn't expect the zombie swine flu pandemic.

[Video]

[marsfireignite]

You could help the infection from spreading, you know, instead of being a jerk.

[Video]

[checkoutpandora]

Just because I'm an angel don't mean I can just clap my hands and boom. Infection contained.

[Video]

[vedransun]

That's in very poor taste... And with probably better choices as well.

[Trance seems unimpressed.]

There's a Zombie Survival Handbook? [Avatar of a Sun; Ignorant of Earth culture.]

[Video]

[checkoutpandora]

Poor taste is what I do.

...You're one of the uninformed ones, right? Those "Not from this century, not from your world, how do I shot pop culture" borderline-Aborigine people?

Re: [Video]

[vedransun]

[A wrinkle forms on her forehead from the 'how do I shot,' though smooths out.]

Depending on what century you speak of, as it could be a different millennium. A member of the Commonwealth hadn't even contacted Earth until the 2100's. What's pop culture to you could very well have been lost due to time.

[And she probably knows that she side-stepped that question completely.]

[Video]

[checkoutpandora]

So basically, tongue-clicks would probably be easier for you, right?