I did not immediately understand why a tomato fell from a tree that I'm 99% certain does not produce them.

Today marks the first time I've spooked a tree-borne squirrel into dropping his tomato.

Once again life has presented me with a supremely intriguing character ( Read more... )

There was once the day the spiders invaded the bathroom ( Read more... )

Last night I had a dream.

I had a ticket to The Oscars, which were no longer popular. They were held in a rundown auditorium, most of the seats were empty, and they were sort of an open mic.

I sat next to Madonna, who hit on me a little, but not as much as I would have liked.

I am rather enthused by the pants I'm wearing right now.

They were $6 at DD's Discounts.

I've fallen pretty far from that time I bought khakis at Bob's for a dollar, but this is a modern time at a modern location. It's okay to pay a modern price.

These pants don't even really fit me.
That's also modern, in its way.

I'm aware that Target is already very convenient.

However, I'd love to be able to walk in and say, "Bring me your finest toaster," and be done with it.

Me: "Given infinite time and infinite resources, what is the best toaster you could devise?"
Them: "Oh. That would still just be the KitchenAid two-slice toaster. $49.99."
Me: "Bring it hither!"

Life is like a bucket of roosters.

You don't know how it got there, and you wonder if anyone else is around to explain it.

The Great Cassette Bag of 2012

Special Message Regarding this Final RoundupThis is the final roundup.
12 Inches of Snow (Snow)Snow is absolutely talented at saying words quickly and in a funny-sounding voice. I quite like that aspect, so it's a shame there was no glue to hold it all together. Snow is white, but it is not glue. I do appreciate ( Read more... )

The Great Cassette Bag of 2012

Special UpdateYo, uh, please read these testimonials regarding cassettes to which I have listened.

Editor's note: The opinions featured in the following blog are solely related to Batch Two and in no way reflect the quality of the cassettes from Batch One, featured in entry #128729.
Crush (Orchestral Manoeuvres in ( Read more... )

The Great Cassette Bag of 2012

PreambleBack in the halcyon days of summer I was fortunate enough to stand near the counter of my favorite local comics purveyor at an opportune moment. The good salesperson was drafting a sign for an upcoming sale. Back issues were such a price; used CDs were another. What caught my eye the most that fateful ( Read more... )