So where would a chicken sammitch go to find out if he had a venereal disease?

This isn't a silly joke or anything. I'm FUCKING serious!!

Sometimes I use that Yahoo! Messenger thing, and one of my friends is Magiccrystalball. He has answers to all my questions ( Read more... )

NC-17

Woah, dude, too far. You're totally unsuitable
for anybody under the age of 17, and for society
in general. Tough break...

"Which Movie Classification Are You?"
Test created by Jamie - take it here.

Hot Damn!! I'm hungry.

I could just about eat a horse.

So I went out on the town the other day, and I was in this bar. I saw my picture on the television!!! I'm being advertised as for sale, and yet they haven't been able to catch me!!

This is crackers!

( Read more... )

I heard some rumor about Mayor McCheese sending some of his minions to try to find me.

All's I know is that I'll clobber Grimace if he comes anywheres near me.

Fat Fuck!!

I've been running all night.

Mayor McCheese has been corroborating with the authorities, and they think they can find me.

WELL FUCK THAT!!!

They'll never fucking find me, i swear!!

I think that if I were ever to consider being eaten, it would have to be by a very pretty girl, and I'd have to have a marijuana and lemon pepper glaze on me and three large pickle slices underneath me with provolone cheese on a kaiser bun.

So I was sitting around pondering existence the other day, and I realized that in MY case, the best roommate situations I've ever had have involved vegans, because they can usually get along with my habit of eating bread, lettuce, french fries, mayonaise, tomatoes and Diet Coke.

And I'm glad they don't want to eat me.