Days like this

[chlorinegoddess]

BUGGER ALL

Comments

[nightswatch]

I didn't mean to come off as too glib on facebook. The truth is that I have come so far as a pianist and musician in general since I started school here that I can't even see where I used to be. It's just that so much of that is catch up and everyone else is still better off than me, so comparatively there is insecurity. But good things happen in grad school, and they will for you too!

I have to say, I am feeling a little left out with you and Claire both angst-ing it up. I mean, I guess I feel like that's sort of supposed to be my thing. What gives?

[gildeddawn]

You can have my angst. Go right ahead. Please.

[gildeddawn]

So, I'm clearly going to sound like a gigantic, horrible hypocrite here, but if it's something you love, you can totally do it! If you want to do something, I have complete faith in you that you will do it.

Mad sympathy on the angst, though. I mean, for real.

[lenulus]

Hey, this is definitely reminiscent of my first year in grad school. I feel like every time I've started a new stage of education (high school, college, grad), there's been a prolonged period of adjustment where I felt I was in way over my head and that I had no idea what I was doing. More often than not, I've had to suppress an overwhelming urge to just give up--because a day job is in some ways sooo much easier and doesn't come close to inspiring the same level of anxiety and self-doubt. However, if you just stick it out and plod through the waves of insecurity, one day you realize you're actually good at what you do and that you belong where you are (and that feeling really did just sort of appear out of nowhere like a revelation from some sort of deity). When I had to take my first grad class, it was daunting; first experiment, first paper, comprehensive exams, dissertation--all of these seemed insurmountable up until I did them. But, now when I have to write up an experiment for publication, it's not that big of a deal.