Come out swinging

[chris_o_donnell]

I'm still trying to feel out exactly what it is I want to say, and how I want to say it. At what point of disclosure does one become self-absorbed?

My conversation with

Comments

[drew_barrymore]

I think you have to start with yourself. Start accepting your emotions for what they are, make sure that they are honest and true, don't lie to yourself and then it gets easier to express those emotions to other people when you need to.

Easier said than done. I know.

I don't know if it's the natural progression of a marriage, but I think it's the natural progression of life. Some things were meant to be, others weren't. It's hard to break promises you've made to yourself and others - I know, I've had to do it. But I think it's better to admit when something isn't working then to continue living a lie.

[chris_o_donnell]

I'm working on it, I promise. I think that being honest with myself has been the real problem all along. Maybe I'm just waiting for the dam to break, or something...

Once upon a time, I wouldn't have thought there was any way that I could fail at something like marriage. I've always come from the school of thought that no matter what the difficulty, it could always be worked past if we put our hearts into it. But if there's no heart to put into it, there's trouble.

I really don't mean for this to come off as heavy as it does. Maybe I should have just spent this entry making fun of all my friends instead.

[drew_barrymore]

You don't have to promise anything to me. It's your life. Being honest with yourself is harder than it seems. Sometimes even when you think you are you're really just seeing what you want to see instead of what is really there.

I think you'll find your way through it.

There are enough people who do that it's nice to see someone being serious for a change.

[chris_o_donnell]

I think I was promising to myself. I'm also promising to see things at face value instead of how I wish.

I'm glad you have faith in me. That makes one of us. ;)

Well, I'll try to alternate soul searching with more light-hearted fare. Another promise.

[sandra__bullock]

I think you need to talk to me, I'll help you sort things out if you'll let me. :)

[chris_o_donnell]

I know you'd be a big help, Sandy. Maybe we could just go have lunch or go get a drink or something soon. That would help take my mind off things.

[sandra__bullock]

That sounds great... I'd love that. I was actually thinking about going out for a drink tonight, are you free?

[chris_o_donnell]

I can't tonight. I've got an early meeting tomorrow for Kinsey.

Within the next couple of days, though, definitely. I'll even pay. ;)

[h_berry]

Oh, sweetie. You've got to relax. That's your lesson for today.

[chris_o_donnell]

I'm trying, I'm trying.

Maybe a little massage would help.

I'm so bad.

[h_berry]

And where, exactly, would I be massaging?

but, I can be worse..hehe

[chris_o_donnell]

Wherever the most tension is?

I think we're about even.

[affleck]

Sure, you're invited.

[chris_o_donnell]

Thanks, man.

I've been trying to get in touch with you. I've been talking to Matt, but I can't seem to track you down.

[elliott_smith]

In answer to your question, yes it is. I believe there are many different kinds of love, from friendship to being in love.

I mean, I love a lot of people I wouldn't want to fuck. Wow, that didn't sound right. I'll shut up now.

[chris_o_donnell]

Good. I'm glad I'm not alone in thinking that. I'm actually starting to believe it now.

But do you fuck a lot of people you don't love? I think that's a more telling question.

[elliott_smith]

I've fucked a lot of people I wasn't in love with. But I've never fucked anyone I didn't at least have feelings for, if nothing more than friendship.

I can't sleep with someone based only on attraction. There has to be some kind of feeling there. Well, I shouldn't say that. I did fuck someone I was nothing more than attracted to. Once. Recently. And I regret it.

*sigh* Relationships seem to be impossible for me though. I think the best relationship I have is with my guitar. Never cheats, never lies and is always an inspiration. If I could find a person like that, I'd consider myself lucky.

[chris_o_donnell]

I'm the same way. I just have never been able to prevent myself from feeling some sort of attachment, even if the relationship started as purely physical. Almost like the physical part created the bond in the first place.

I'm sorry to hear that. I know that type of situation, and the only thing that's keeping me from making it happen now is my awareness of where those type of things go.

Hahaha. My best relationship at the moment would have to be with my kids. If they get out of hand, I can always make them take "time out" until things are better again.