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Jim D. tried to start something with Father M. Jim said, “Are you a preacher?” and the Father said yes and Jim said, “I’m not a Christian” and Father said, “That’s ok, you’re still a good man” and walked away. Jim said after him, “If you ever want to tell me the truth, come talk to me.” Thank goodness Father is deaf and didn’t hear him, I would ( Read more... )

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http://maxclotfelter.blogspot.com/

Max made my day.

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Me: How long have you been smoking anyway, Dorothy?
Dorothy S, age 77: Well, I caught it from my roommate at summer camp.
Me: How old were you?
Dorothy: I was 16, and they were Pall Malls and they were strong.

(She smokes Virginia Slims now.)

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Me:  What are you doing today, Kitty?  Relaxing?
Kitty M.: More like ex-laxing.
Me: (dies from laughter)

Gloria B.: They say it's gonna rain today.
Me: Oh, no.
Gloria B.: Of course, my big toe told me so yesterday.