James's fucking dog has eaten my fucking alice band. If I wasn't such a nice person, I would threaten to kill the dog and make it into an alice band ( Read more... )

I've joined a gym! Yes, really. Why are you looking at me like that? I'm healthy. Sometimes. Honest. I ate some broccoli earlier!

Despite it being Friday the 13th, and despite me knowing this, I have been confident that it was Thursday all day. Ergo, I effectively only have an hour and a half of Friday before it becomes Saturday. How queer. I really do need a job if I can't even keep track of what day it is any more, don't I?

I went to Borders the other day to exchange a book I'd got for Christmas that I already had a copy of. And guess what they had, reduced from £20 to £7.99 (the exact price of the book I was exchanging)?


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Dear whoever had the idea of raising tube fares AGAIN,

ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING?

Love,

Eve xxxx

happy new years one and all! i'm drunk!

Did anyone else see Stuart Lee at Glastonbury this year?

....

A rather productive day, really. Went to Exeter on a bus full of emo kids, just about managed to resist the urge to kill them all as they sang the wrong words along to The Libertines then progressed in annoyance and volume to The Offspring and various 'screamo' music. Lovely. Was tempted to turn the lights off and offer them some razorblades to ( Read more... )

K, can someone please explain to me why, when I searched on google for 'kitten harnesses', one of the sponsored sites it came up with was an 'adult' website, featuring... wait for it... 'anal lingerie'?!?!