Hope you've had a beautiful day!

Over the last two years, I've gone through Shaggy's struggles of finally having his very large and painful inguinal hernia repaired and while in recovery finding out that he has Atrial Fibrillation and while getting his heart back into proper rhythm (over a 5 day time period in the hospital) they discovered that he had multiple Atrial Septal ( Read more... )

This was my post tonight on Facebook in my Sacred Spiral group where I've felt most comfortable sharing my journey and grief so far ( Read more... )

This is part of a letter I wrote to a close friend regarding how I'm feeling over losing my Mama. It then dawned on me that I need to document all of these "journalings" (facebook posts, emails, etc.) into my blog so that I have them all together if I should ever want/need to reference any of it in the future ( Read more... )

I'm trying SO HARD to be in the spirit of the holiday...even if only for my girls but it is honestly more to try and honor my mom. She did Christmas better than anyone I know. Not just presents, but all the decorations and lights and music and something yummy cooking at all times. But I still haven't even so much as put up a tree. I've managed to ( Read more... )

It has been awhile since my last entry and so much has happened. We (Shaggy, Maeven, and myself) are no longer staying with our friends (extended family) here in MO. Instead, we are finally living in the rent house that was being remodeled for what seemed like forever. There have been some pretty major hurdles along the path that led to moving ( Read more... )

It's amazing to me how I can be so certain about things in my life and yet when the path I'm on takes me to the things I want/need most... my fucked up emotions get in the way of the pure joy of the moment. Yeah, go ahead, call me a headcase.. I am. And it's nothing I haven't already called myself so you aren't going to hurt my feelings ( Read more... )

I think it's kind of funny how songs can make you miss someone so much and at the same time make you feel like they are sitting right next to you. I was listening to Tom Petty's Wildflowers cd today in the car and ever since then I haven't been able to get a special lady out of my head. She rocks in so many ways and I'm discovering more every day ( Read more... )

You know.. it really bothers me that no matter how happy I am at any given moment that somehow my core life fear of being left alone kicks in and I start having these horrible nightmares!!!!!!! Why? Why can I just not go through the motions of my day to day routine enjoying my life as it comes???? Why can I not just BE and in the same moment BE ( Read more... )

Just a tad frustrated today when I realized that my oringinal starting post, journal title, etc was no longer here. I'm not sure what happened really but other than my "Getting A Move On" post everything else is gone so I'm basically starting over. Oh well, anything worth doing is worth doing again, I suppose.

All things considered, I still like ( Read more... )