adored i try to remember that and be strong, if ont even know how to get out of patterns, independence is freedom and joy, but here i am reacting to cold silent apathy ( Read more... )

so i get easily stressed i realized. i always thought i had a handle ont hings, but right now i feel scared and frustratrted confused and worried. i dont know where tolive. i dont know if i should go to humboldt, and i dont know who i would live with. I dont thinkiw ant to stay down here, i dont thinki want to go up there, and i strongly want ( Read more... )

i can image a few rather direct places i lost my head, or they could just be plain chemical inbalances... anyway middle school was definatly a rip adn a half on my selfcondifidence, leaving me questioning all my stregth, hormone change? yes, natural, yes? good yes?.... well the the introduction of love and alcohol, lost controla nd got heart sick ( Read more... )

sandal/flip flop dressish ( Read more... )

bc you'll speak your mind doesnt mean you smarter than anyone ( Read more... )

i hope i am smarter than i give myself credit for, i am pretty sure i am, am i want to be confident, i think i end up "hating" my best freinds, alex adn phil and even bryant and at one point bci feel liek they are so much wiser adn more togethr than i am and i get jeaslous adn i want to latch on to them , thast why i am not mature enough for a ( Read more... )

i hurt so much i feel deep bad feelings inside for no apparent reason, but i beleive there is a reason, i promised myself not to think i am stupid and silly wheni feel these things any more and to stop appologizing so much, i dont know if other people feel as much hurt as me or if i thinkt o much about how they may be hurting anf over analze things ( Read more... )

so i have been wanting to make a list of things i am sorry for reflecting back on highschool and 1 yr of collge, this is not an all encompassing list, and actually i know it does not need to be, these are thing i would like to say to people but they probably dont care and or hve forgotten, i doubt most of these people or anyone will read this list ( Read more... )

good songs ( Read more... )

so i dig phil and we're happy, i have fun intresting nice good person, but i think its just time, i cant imagine living without him next year, espeically up here, what am i doing! i came here to be with him and now i am building some life of my own her?? reALLY is that smart, i would have two ex boyfriends up here, both of who i love but thats not ( Read more... )