It seems that since I quit writing in here, most of my friends are gone; not like I need friends on here to enjoy myself. It feels like I am on a new website. I just want to write, express myself and read some other peoples writing.

I have to start getting ready to go visit Dar I'll write more later.

I got the urge for some reason to start writing in here again. I wonder if its just a phase or if I will keep it up. What I do know is that I need to write more and I figure this is one way to encourage myself ( Read more... )

Whats going on:

- I started going to AA meetings because I am an addict
- I have a sponsor who seems really grounded and full of wisdom
- AA is helping me connect with the spiritual side of myself; that which I have neglected due to my drug use
- I feel more motivated these last few days, as compared to last week, last month, last year ect...
- My ( Read more... )

I had a dream last night where I was removing a fence that surounded a skating rink. I placed the fence in the back lane for the garbage men to take away. I can't pinpoint exactly what the fence signifies, but it is just too coincidental that at this time in my life I have begun to tear down the fence I have built up around myself; I've stopped ( Read more... )

Blah... the funeral is tomorrow, today I feel like crap, yesterday was the first day in I don't know how long that I went for a whole day without getting high. Wanna know what I feel like doing right now? I want to sit in the living room, smoke some weed, and stare off the balcony, wondering if the people in the other buildings are having the same ( Read more... )

I just can't get over the fact that Dan's Mother is is passing away. After a long, hard fight with cancer, Elizabeth maybe has a day or two left. On friday afternoon I went to go and visit her and the family, its was nice and so terribly sad at the same time. Ever since that experience I can't get death outta my mind. She was so frail, weak, and ( Read more... )

Well I just may have solved one of my problems. A friend of mine mentioned that he is looking for a roomate. So I'd be moving back into the milk carton building! I liked it there; big balcony with a view, dishwasher, pool, sauna, nice location. The only thing is that I was not planning to go over $350ish for rent but $400 isn't too far off. The ( Read more... )

I'm back at Dan's apartment after staying at Jills for a week. She was out of town for several days so I spent some time with my cat. When Jill came back I continued to stay there for the weekend regardless of the fact that she was working. I spent a lot of time doing a whole lot of nothing for a whole week. Its not like there wasn't anything I ( Read more... )

Every little thing has been so up and down. I feel so close to unstable. And despite, or perhaps to spite, the way I have been feeling;I plan to completely let loose, get as high as I want, laugh as loud as I want and, stay up as late as I want. I could care less if I sound destructive, because thats how I feel.

My, oh my. Life seems to be going in one direction and next thing you know its a new round and you get dealt a totally different set of cards. I don't feel like going into detail, I'm sick of the details; the outcome is that I am single now and living downtown again. I moved into Daniels apartment and took Colins old bedroom until I figure ( Read more... )