[Fic] All That I Am - 2/12
Title: All That I Am
Author: Coley Merrin
Rating: R
Pairing: Zhou Mi/Kyuhyun
Genre: AU, Romance
Summary: To find a date that Kyuhyun can stomach is impossible - unless they hire one to pretend. But not even the perfect companion can stop years worth of threats, or keep their acting from becoming all too real.
***
Chapter One * Chapter Two * Chapter Three
***
Kyuhyun smoothed a muscle on the side of his head that was twitching. Eeteuk had a plan for every single thing in his life, it seemed. He had assumed that Eeteuk would be the one who took care of all of Zhou Mi’s issues, and got him moved in, and Kyuhyun would just monitor or step in when needed. At least until Eeteuk had verbally slapped him in the head with something that should’ve been blatantly obvious to him if he’d given it two seconds of thought.
He couldn’t exactly have his personal assistant move in his “lover” that he was apparently so wild for. At least, not without it feeling like a total setup. There were things that Eeteuk could do for Zhou Mi without his involvement, but a step like moving someone into his house was kind of a big one. Had any of the women he’d dated ever seen his bedroom? He didn’t think so, unless the housekeeper had given them a tour before some kind of party or function he’d been throwing. And he was letting someone into his bedroom to stay. It made him itchy, and made him wonder why he hadn’t protested more to start with. Especially when the maids pilfered one of the matching dressers from a spare room and dragged it into his. That was the big oh yeah moment in his head. Pretending to date someone, fine. Installing someone in his bedroom? Employee or not, the man wasn’t like some kind of modern sculpture he could just set in a corner and forget.
Maybe he could think of him as some kind of valet, but hell, not even valets slept in the same bed. He hadn’t stayed in a bed with anyone his whole life. A few nights of having someone sleep over, sure, but nothing long term.
But actually helping the man move in felt like he was signing his own death warrant. At least, if something went wrong he could blame himself as well, because it wouldn’t take more than a word to stop all of it. Right then, if he wanted to.
The apartment building was small, sort of out of the way, and squished between a couple of other unrelated buildings. Eeteuk had all but programmed the address in for him, ordering him out of his office. It was the weekend. Surely he ought to be able to do what he wanted? Moving a stranger into his bedroom didn’t even qualify. Eeteuk was always trying to tell him that he needed to learn delegation, but when he threw that back at Eeteuk on the way to his car, Eeteuk had just indicated that this situation wasn’t one of those times.
Zhou Mi was waiting for him outside, likely on Eeteuk’s tipoff, so that was something at least. Since it was the weekend, he’d gone in the office more casually dressed, so at least he wasn’t supposed to help Zhou Mi with his stuff in a tie. Though knowing Eeteuk, he likely had a change of casual clothing stashed somewhere in Kyuhyun’s office for him.
Zhou Mi glanced curiously behind him, at the Audi he’d driven up in. He found on a scale of annoyance that expensive, ostentatious cars garnered exactly the attention expected. Definitely more than wanted. It had four wheels, a motor, and some speed, and that was all he really needed.
“So how many trips with your stuff are we going to have to take?” he asked, wondering just how much stuff Zhou Mi had. Sure it wasn’t a tiny little two-seater coupe, but it wasn’t exactly going to haul furniture, either.
“I think everything should fit in there,” Zhou Mi said, leading him up the stairs. “The apartment came furnished, since it was short term, and it’s hard to pack a lot of things with me. I gave most of my food away, since Eeteuk told me I should.”
Kyuhyun saw why the apartment was temporary, since it was barely bigger than his armpit. And it wasn’t just that he was used to living in a big house, either. It was legitimately small. He actually had to edge around the tall suitcase and garment bag draped over it to get to the “kitchen” with its sink that he didn’t think he could actually spread his hand out in.
Zhou Mi was muscling the folded up mattresses into the cupboard, and dragging a couple of boxes out of the way. “This is it,” he said, sounding a little out of breath. "I’m not going to miss it. I didn’t even have a bathroom of my own.”
Kyuhyun made a noise that sounded like sympathy to his own ears. “Okay. Let’s get to it then.”
No matter what way they cut it, it was going to take more than one trip, so he and Zhou Mi both took a box, and since his felt like it was packed with rocks, he had no idea how Zhou Mi was carrying his own, bigger one down the steps. The trickle of sweat down his back was a trifling annoyance, as they jogged back up after getting the boxes into the trunk. Just barely. Zhou Mi inspected the cupboard, the few drawers and corners, and deemed it empty, letting Kyuhyun commandeer the garment bag, similarly heavy, while Zhou Mi dragged the suitcase. Both bags fit into the back seat, and he thought it was well-done, because if Zhou Mi had anything else, Zhou Mi would’ve had to carry it on his lap.
“I have to run and give my key and sign out with the landlord, okay?” Zhou Mi said. “I… I’ll be right back.”
He just leaned against the car and caught his breath as Zhou Mi dashed back inside. The man was two years older than him, and seemed to have plenty more energy. He was going to have to try and schedule those workouts a little more frequently. He’d turned the air conditioning on inside the car by the time Zhou Mi and his handbag slid inside.
“Sorry about that,” Zhou Mi breathed, buckling in. “I really appreciate you coming to get me. I was surprised when Eeteuk told me, but his reasoning made sense.”
“It always makes sense,” Kyuhyun sighed, turning out into the street. “That’s the problem with him. Just let me or one of the maids know if you need anything for storing your belongings. There’s a dresser for you, and part of the closet. Did Eeteuk look at your clothes?”
“Not yet. He said he would once I’d moved in, so it didn’t look weird.”
“That’s fine.” He thought about it a moment, and how he’d phrased it. “I don’t mean that you look tacky or anything. Sometimes I’d give a date a dress, or something. You’ll just need clothes if you’re going to have to endure the conference and who knows what else with me.”
Zhou Mi laughed. “No, I understand. I really appreciate you thinking of it. I definitely don’t want to look less than I should beside you. But if I’m keeping the clothes…am I keeping the clothes…? Maybe I should pay for them?”
Kyuhyun grunted, merging over to get to his house. “No. We’re not going to start talking about stuff like that. You need it for the job, I pay for it. And I certainly don’t need more suits, so they’ll be yours. You’ll have a car for your use, assuming you have a license, and the household staff at your disposal. And, I think you know the rest of the drill.”
“Let someone know if I need anything else. Yes, I will. Thank you.”
“Hopefully I’ll be the one thanking you,” he said, turning into his driveway. His back moaned at the thought of carrying that stuff into the house, but he told himself not to be a wimp and just do it.
At least there weren’t stairs, and that was a saving grace. Zhou Mi carried a box behind him as he wandered through the living room and back to the living quarters. Everything forward was open, for the express purpose of entertaining, but his room was cloistered back beyond, for privacy. His was the master suite, big enough for the extra large king bed, a couple of chairs for reading, a few sculptures, and of course the two dressers. The bathroom designed for two people, and the walk-in closet were off of one wall. He heaved the box between the two dressers, thinking Zhou Mi would get it sorted out.
“Well, this is it. Bedroom, sweet bedroom. It’s good for…sleeping, I guess. If you need-”
“Pony,” Zhou Mi blurted out.
Kyuhyun’s eyebrows rose. Hangers, a bookcase, that he expected. But that?
“Excuse me?”
Zhou Mi was waving one hand, like he was trying to bury his words as he gestured to the bedroom at large. “No, I don’t need- I mean, it’s almost big enough to keep a pony.”
That did bring a laugh. “I think my father had a different way to describe it. Blame him, though, because he’s the one who had it built.”
Zhou Mi’s shoulders had started to draw in a little, as he considered Kyuhyun. “What would you prefer to be called?”
That stopped him in his mental wanderings. “If you don’t call me by my name, that would be damn odd, wouldn’t it?”
Zhou Mi laughed. “Yes. But I mean when we’re alone.”
“No. There shouldn’t be any difference. Get used to calling me by name, and there won’t be any awkward slips of calling me Mr. Cho in front of people. We’re trying to make my reputation better, not screw it up more. And having to backtrack and pretend you call me that in bed, you might as well just call me Master and be done with it.”
Zhou Mi’s chin was actually quivering in amusement. “I don’t know if I could convincingly pretend to be into that. Kyuhyun.”
It sounded nice, with the little lilt in Zhou Mi’s voice. And he shoved that aside.
“Good. That’s out of the way. Let’s get your suitcase and clothes then, and you can get settled. I’m going back into the office to get some more work done. Feel free to wander. There’s a small pool, a gym. Go wild. A maid will let you know when dinner is served if I’m not back.”
Zhou Mi trotted after him as they went to get the last of the bags. “But you will be back tonight?”
He imagined rolling in late, as was pretty normal for him, finding Zhou Mi already passed out in his bed. And Zhou Mi didn’t even know what side of the bed he preferred. Or getting home earlier and having to listen to Zhou Mi fall asleep. He wasn’t sure which way was more awkward. The latter was certainly more polite. At least for the first day. Even, he reminded himself, if he was employing Zhou Mi.
“I’ll try to be home,” he said, hoping it wasn’t too grudging.
“Okay,” Zhou Mi said, wrestling his garment bag over the suitcase and shooting Kyuhyun a smile. “I can get this in by myself, then, since you wanted to go. The quicker you go, the quicker you get back, right?”
“That’s right. Okay. Have fun with that then.”
“Thank you, Kyuhyun.”
The last part he saw of Zhou Mi were his feet as he turned out of the garage. It had been an amusing exercise. The man was stronger than he looked, and had ethics, which was good. He didn’t feel the need to shake the man off his leg, which was also definitely a perk. Since he knew it would be right into Eeteuk’s lap that everything got shook. Still, it was only the first day. If Zhou Mi had questions, he’d answer them. One way or another, they had to work together, or it was useless. He thought they’d accomplished that pretty well today. He rolled his eyes. No, Eeteuk wasn’t always right.
***
Zhou Mi blew out a breath as Kyuhyun drove away. It would’ve been so much less awkward if Eeteuk had just come to help him move, or if he’d gotten a taxi instead, but he did realize that easier didn’t always make it better. It gave him a chance to learn a little more about Kyuhyun. Even if one of those things was considering the way the cloth stretched over his shoulders as he followed him down the stairwell. A little admiration was one thing, and it was healthy, and even good for the job and role he was supposed to portray. Just as long as he kept it to that. Just a little. Sometimes repeating “no, I can’t have that” to himself a thousand times worked, if it was a cookie or something. So he’d settle in at a comfortable level of hoping he at least liked his boss and pretend lover, and leave it at that.
And the house… The house. The living area and some sort of mingling party room were expansive, making his little temporary apartment look like someone’s linen closet. No wonder Kyuhyun had been surprised when Zhou Mi had let him in. If he’d been Kyuhyun, he’d have been claustrophobic. It was all modern and sort of bright, actually. Little touches of art and a magazine on the table that sort of gave it a lived-in feel. Sort of. But he had kept up with Kyuhyun, puffing under the weight of the box in his arms, until they got into Kyuhyun’s room.
That was way more surprising. Decorated in a warm green, blacks, grays and cream, it was big. No surprise. The bed was big, too, covered with some soft-looking green silk spread. Obviously Kyuhyun hadn’t decorated it himself, but seeing it made Zhou Mi think he’d seen a little insight into Kyuhyun’s mind. It was clean, yes, but it also felt somewhat homey. There was a whimsical sculpture of a turtle climbing what looked like a branch in one corner, and dark, very modern dressers. That was where Kyuhyun had dropped his box. His spot. It shuddered in him as he very carefully maneuvered his suitcase in, making sure he wasn’t making any marks on the wood floor. He closed the door to the bedroom behind him and just sat, leaning against his garment bag. Home. Another form of home. Kyuhyun’s home, that he was sharing. He sniffed the air, trying to peg a defining scent, but the air was light, well circulated. It probably smelled more of Kyuhyun in the bathroom, or even the closet.
He got to his feet with some regret, checking the drawers and finding them pleasant.
He laid down his suitcase with a grunt. “I have too many clothes.”
***
With most everything tucked away into drawers, he actually went into the walk-in closet. Boggling at the neatly pressed, hanging shirts, the suits, and things on shelves. Shoes. From brightly polished work shoes to well-broken in jogging shoes. He kept himself from kneeling down right there in thanks that someone would design a room like that. Just a room. For a closet. He laughed imagining asking Kyuhyun if he could just bed down right in there. There was even a nice wide bench, too. He felt kind of sheepish, hanging his own sparse assortment of clothes that needed to be hung up, across from Kyuhyun’s. Though, from Kyuhyun’s words, he’d be getting some new ones. The thought both thrilled and shamed him. He wasn’t used to getting something for nothing, but he did also know that Kyuhyun needed someone who wasn’t self conscious about their clothes beside him. Clothes did not always make the man, but there was the perception of them. There was even an area in the closet for suitcase storage, and he sort of fell in love right there. With a room.
His little tote bag went with him into the bathroom, glad to see there was a little cabinet on one end of the two sink-counter that was empty. It was a pretty typical bathroom. Tub, large though it was, shower, toilet, hooks for robes. Not ostentatious, but considering its uses, it didn’t have to be. He was still left with a box of other things. Books, mementos, pictures, electronics. But that, he felt, could wait. It was the first day. Just getting his clothes unpacked was a good accomplishment.
And his gun as well. He peeked through the millimeter crack he’d opened in the drawer on one side of Kyuhyun’s bed and found things in it, and checked the other to find it empty. He wasn’t snooping, because he didn’t even see what was in it. It wasn’t the drawer he was going to be using, but the cabinet itself. Something for his locked case to be in without getting any sort of attention from the maids or Kyuhyun. He wasn’t even sure that he needed it, only that he was required to have it on orders from his boss. He imagined their positions were reversed, and decided that Kyuhyun was a brave man. Allowing a stranger into his house, his bedroom. Something deeply personal. He thought of the picture of Kyuhyun smiling in the file, and wondered in all the years he’d been pushing people away, how many of them had seen that expression. He was a total stranger and he had access to the most personal places that a person’s home could have. And he was determined not to abuse that trust.
So he did not, as Kyuhyun suggested, explore. Being let into the bedroom was one thing, actually exploring the house was another. At least on the first day. Even if curiosity was dancing down his spine. A pool? A gym? He had known Kyuhyun’s home was large, and he had even seen pictures of it, but it went far beyond his expectations. Rather than obsess, he sank into one of the dark gray, sturdy if not extremely comfortable, chairs in the room, and opened a book. He’d read until it was time to eat, or until Kyuhyun came home, whichever was first. Though, from the antsy way Kyuhyun wanted to get back to the office, he had a feeling which of those it’d be.
***
And he was right. A maid had come to fetch him for dinner, knocking discreetly at the doorframe and leading him to the smaller, more intimate dining nook. A dinner for at least two or three was laid out for him, as they brought what he had asked to drink - tea - and then disappeared as soon as it was all settled. It was like being in the world’s most efficient, most polite, single-customer restaurant. It was very clean, very typical Korean food, he thought as he nibbled at a spicy rice cake. Very good, but he had expected that. Eeteuk had said he could let the kitchen know if he wanted specific things, but he thought to give that time as well. Get the lay of the land, and then do what he had to.
He debated, go to find someone to let them know he was done, or just get up to go. But before he was most of the way to the door they had served from, someone emerged to let him to know he could go, and would he like tea served to the bedroom?
But he went back to wait. And wait. And wait. Reading his book, falling asleep in the middle of a chapter and waking as the book crashed to floor. He showered then, eying the bed with some want, but determined not to even touch it until Kyuhyun gave him instruction. For all he knew, he really was sleeping in the closet. Kyuhyun might have a preference on the side of the bed. Who knew.
Luckily the door opened before he had a chance to imagine stretching out on the floor for very long. Kyuhyun, rubbing the back of his neck as he closed the door, did not seem surprised nor particularly pleased to see Zhou Mi sitting there. Not unhappy either, though still tired.
“The living room is probably more comfortable for reading,” Kyuhyun said, his voice scratchy with disuse. “You’re not some concubine confined here. You did eat?”
“I did, thank you.” At least Kyuhyun cared. A little. And he had a thought. “Did you eat?”
“I had a snack.”
Well, that carried a wide range of meanings, but it wasn’t really in him to argue. Yet. Eeteuk seemed to think he would be responsible in some way for Kyuhyun’s wellbeing, but he had to find equilibrium first. He waited, massaging his knees as Kyuhyun dressed for bed, emerging in nothing but pajama pants.
And in watching him pull back the side of the covers nearest the bathroom, Zhou Mi discovered what side of the bed was to be his for sure.
The mattress cradled him, and with the light off, he heard nothing but Kyuhyun’s deep, even breathing. Asleep almost as soon as he hit the pillow, Zhou Mi thought. He willed himself into sleep as well.
***
Zhou Mi came out of sleep with a jerk, feeling for the edge of the bed to give him some definition of where he was. He saw the faint light of the fire alarm on one wall, the echoes of faint light on the floor from beneath the dark curtains. And his stomach growled.
Apparently he’d expended more energy than he’d thought, if he was hungry in the middle of the night. No wonder he’d woken up. He hadn’t even wanted to explore on his own, but he did know where the kitchen was. Maybe there was a piece of fruit or something he could snag to hold him. Or at least something to drink. He slipped out of bed as silently as possible, laying the covers back down and shuffling into his slippers.
The rest of the house wasn’t nearly as dark as the bedroom, but he trod carefully, not wanting wanting to trip over anything or wake up the household. He slipped into the open kitchen door, seeing the carefully laid out room with stove, oven, large double refrigerator and sinks. He looked around like someone was going to stop him, opening the fridge door, looking until he found a container of the soup from dinner. Just a small matter of heating some up.
The closing of the microwave door seemed inordinately loud, and the soup wasn’t as warm as he’d have liked, but it was enough. And he sighed in contentment as he ate. Being in an unfamiliar place always unsettled him for a while. And if it meant a few midnight meals, well. As long as he didn’t get in trouble for it. He would settle out his new-job jitters with time. He could keep some snacks in the closet and go for those in the future, maybe. He’d have to look into it.
The spoon clattered as his whole hand spasmed, nearly dropping the bowl as Kyuhyun appeared out of the hallway like some pale wraith before actually getting some form to him in the light of the kitchen. Why were Kyuhyun’s pajamas pants so light? He swallowed carefully, trying to breathe, and pressing a hand to his galloping heart.
“Kyuhyun.”
“Sorry, did I scare you?” The expression didn’t indicate that he was sorry, more of a smirk on Kyuhyun’s face. “I woke up and noticed you were gone and thought you might’ve gotten lost.”
He laughed a little, setting the bowl on the counter so he could wipe off his suddenly damp palms.
“No. I woke up, and it’s just odd in a new place sometimes. I get anxious, and I get hungry. I didn’t want to wake you up, I’m sorry. Um. And this is okay?”
Kyuhyun pushed himself up so that he was sitting on the counter. “You getting food? No, you have to eat outside. Of course it is. You want something, get it.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you repeat that so often. I just want to be sure.”
“I get it. I’d be like that in someone else’s house, too. It’s the first day, so I’ll cut you some slack.”
Again, that smirk, Kyuhyun grabbing an apple out of a basket and shining it a little on the fabric of his pajama pants. Feeling steadier, he picked his soup back up and continued to eat, Kyuhyun crunching away on the apple in front of him, feet gently swaying. The strangest midnight snack, ever.
“So what attracted you to me?” Zhou Mi asked. Kyuhyun stared at him like he’d grown another head. “No, I don’t mean- I mean, someone might ask us. It was really quick, us meeting, me moving in. It might help to have an answer.”
“Oh. That’s a good idea. I’ll have to think about that,” Kyuhyun said. “We’ll pull it out if we have to. I guess you need to think of something, too.”
“I will. At least we have a while before we have to go anywhere together?”
Maybe they’d find some level of comfortable. Though, it wasn’t like they’d been married for ten years or something. Some level of getting-to-know each other was normal.
“Yeah. At least we do.”
Kyuhyun threw aside his apple core, directing Zhou Mi to the sink.
“While we’re both awake, I’ll show you the rest of the house. Then tomorrow you can come out of the hole,” Kyuhyun said, urging Zhou Mi out of the door ahead of him.
Kyuhyun pointed out where the keys to the extra car were kept for Zhou Mi’s use, where extra jackets and household supplies were. And, leading him to the furthest point, showed him where the room with exercise equipment was, the shower room, and the half basketball court beyond that.
“The pool is covered and heated,” Kyuhyun said. “It’s heated for use year-round. There’s a hot tub, and small sauna, but they need to be prepared. One of the maids can show you how if you want to use them.”
“You said small pool?”
His definition of small, and Kyuhyun’s were clearly different, he thought, looking back at the wide, still pool before they went back into the main part of the house.
“Smaller,” Kyuhyun said, acknowledging his question as he pushed into a room closer to bedroom. “And this room is the library/catch all room. I come here to relax when I have time. It’s more secluded than the living room, so you can store your books here, or whatever. There’s a tv, games. If you see it, use it. Most of the other rooms are spare bedrooms or just storing stuff. So that’s the main part of the house. If you get lost, send up a flare.”
“Thank you, Kyuhyun. It’s a beautiful home.”
“It’s a house,” Kyuhyun said shrugging.
They went into the bedroom together, Kyuhyun crawling into bed with a groan.
“Sleep well,” he told Kyuhyun softly, edging for the bathroom.
He got little more than a grunt in reply. Perhaps he should’ve turned down the tour, but it was hard to say no when Kyuhyun was leading him around. And he was already awake. With any luck, Kyuhyun would be able to make that sleep up.
The covers were only half over Kyuhyun when he came back out, and he paused, indecision torturing him. If he moved the blankets, he could wake Kyuhyun up. If he didn’t, Kyuhyun could get sick. Slowly, very slowly, he lifted the edge of the silk comforter, edging it, edging it, until it fell fully over Kyuhyun’s body. And standing there barely breathing to make sure he hadn’t woken Kyuhyun up. He looked like a child, smashed face-down into the pillow. He definitely was no child, with more power than Zhou Mi could ever dream of wanting.
But he fell asleep on his own side of the bed, finally feeling at peace.
***
The infernal beeping was going to drive him crazy and Zhou Mi tried to burrow deeper in the pillows but it wasn’t working. He looked up, wild, trying to spot Kyuhyun, who was sitting up and silencing the racket.
“Timizit?” he croaked.
“5AM,” Kyuhyun told him. “Go back to sleep. I’ll be back later.”
5AM? That meant… Kyuhyun had gotten less than five hours of sleep? He intended to protest, or worry, or something. But he passed out again too quickly to do so.
And it was Eeteuk who woke him the next time, sending him scrambling out of bed to find his trilling phone, only to listen to the irate man on the other end.
“He looks like a truck backed over him. What time did he come home from working last night?”
“It was almost midnight,” Zhou Mi said, hoping he wasn’t breaking some kind of confidentiality clause between him and Kyuhyun. Though he suspected that Eeteuk either had the information already from building logs or could have gotten it from Kyuhyun himself if he had so desired. “He was up a while in the middle of the night, though.”
“Not sleeping. Ugh. I’m going to try sending him home earlier tonight. Tie him to the bed if you have to.”
“Isn’t that too soon?” Zhou Mi tried joking weakly.
Eeteuk cackled. “Frankly, no. He could probably use that, too. Ah, he’s calling. Bye!”
Zhou Mi sighed, tossing his phone aside. That still gave him hours to fill, but he need to do some shopping, pick up his suit that he’d been fitted for. He’d get out a while, admire the closet a while longer, and if he had to fight with Kyuhyun, he would. Even if it was a subtle fight.
***
He was eating dinner when Kyuhyun came in. Eyes so tired they almost looked bruised, as he took a seat across from Zhou Mi and poured himself a cup of tea.
“How was your day?” Zhou Mi ventured.
“Fine. Meetings. The usual.”
“Is that the time you normally go in?”
“Sometimes, if I know I have a conference call with another country, or work that needs to be done in preparation of a big board meeting.”
“So you won’t have to go in so early tomorrow morning?”
Kyuhyun seemed to hesitate, his chopsticks pausing in the noodles he’d served himself. “No, I guess I don’t have to. Sometimes it’s nice to get work done before everyone shows up.”
“But to stay until after everyone has left?”
Kyuhyun rolled his eyes in a rather knowing manner. “I knew Eeteuk would be after you before too long.”
“It’s something I kind of need to know about?” Zhou Mi said, poking at his own food. “Maybe you could tell me a little about your job, what you do? I looked up the company, did a little bit of research, so I know you do shipping. But at parties or something, I might be asked about your job, and it’d be nice to be able to say something less generic. I doubt anyone thinks we’d discuss all the dry details, but you’d probably tell me a little?”
If they were lovers, that is. If it was some kind of whirlwind romance, spur of the moment decision to have him move in, then of course they’d discuss all the unique areas of their life. The physical parts were all well and good, but couldn’t see Kyuhyun having someone move in on just that. Unless Zhou Mi was supposed to be better in bed than he thought he was.
Kyuhyun was no stranger to describing his company, and he walked Zhou Mi through a typical day of paperwork, decisions, ship reports and troubleshooting and meetings. He wondered how many times that Kyuhyun had to describe just that for investors or other people. He hated to think of someone’s life being taken over by responsibilities, even if they were to something they were dedicated to.
“You took over for your father?”
Kyuhyun inclined his head in agreement. “Yes, when the doctor told him he needed to reduce his stress or die in the company’s arms. I had already been working beside him for a few years, but he took six months to really get me installed, and then he went to half time for a year, and then I took over fully. He and my mother and younger sister are off having a tropical vacation for the next month or so.”
How did it feel to give up half a life, and health, for the sake of his family? Of course, for his family, Kyuhyun had done what was necessary. Though he wondered how much that Kyuhyun did that was not strictly necessary. Because he felt he had to step into his father’s shoes.
“Do you ever regret it?”
“He’s learned how to be happy doing like he is now. My mom is able to cajole him into things. I think they worry that I’ll end up doing the same thing as he did. It’s just a really busy time for the company. I can’t take the time to train someone to come up under me to take some of the load off, not yet.”
“I imagine he said the same thing most of the time he was working.”
“He built the company from when he could barely employ a single person, and now we employ thousands. He always had the mentality that he’d do as much as humanly possible.”
“And you can break that cycle.”
Kyuhyun set his chopsticks down. “Yeah.”
A clear end to talking about his family. All he could do was lighten the mood as much as possible. He was the nail that was sticking out too far in the board of Kyuhyun’s life, and he didn’t want to risk getting beaten back in too far, definitely not before he had completed his job. He had already begun to plan the house that he wanted to provide his parents when he walked away. Maybe his mother wouldn’t get a closet as grand as Kyuhyun’s, but it would be good enough.
“Maybe you could put me in a box and ship me home to my parents every now and again,” he suggested slyly.
“That would require a big box, but I think we could handle it.”
That smirk again. In the office, it had seemed like an affectation, like some kind of expression put on as someone who was used to being in power. It still was that, to some extent. But he wondered if he was coloring it with his own impressions of Kyuhyun. That he was a man who worked too hard, and had too few defenses against bad judgement calls, ones that benefited the company, but not necessarily himself. Maybe it seemed outwardly mocking, but he wondered how much of it was directed within. And still, the expression on Kyuhyun had its own appeal. Kyuhyun fell asleep on the bed still fully clothed, and all Zhou Mi could really do was spread a blanket over him, and not long after, follow him into sleep.
***
Most of the time he was able to put Zhou Mi’s existence out of his head entirely. Put it in a box, shove it aside, keep working. That first night back at home, home had just felt different. The empty box in the garage, apprehension opening the door. Finding Zhou Mi in his pajamas had been one of those moments. That chair in his bedroom was definitely more form than function. He’d felt a little put out at first, that he was expected to play tour guide.
But he got, then, that Zhou Mi saw it as respect. Respect not to wallow on someone’s bed before given the go-ahead, respect not to wander as though he were owner of a space. Even dogs had to be shown their territory at times.
As an executive, the decisions he made were not usually made blindly, but they were made decisively. So even if he didn’t understand Zhou Mi’s unwillingness to do what Kyuhyun had offered, he appreciated the decision itself, and the integrity behind that. To some people, houses, things, were sacred. Zhou Mi projected that onto Kyuhyun, but how could he have known that it wasn’t the truth?
Zhou Mi did whatever he did with his time while Kyuhyun was at work, but he did notice the tailor’s tag in the closet. The new suit, for the little cocktail party they were attending. Something small, not overwhelming. Just a toe in the water, which would send ripples, tides, out to everyone. Cho Kyuhyun had taken a lover, a man, had installed him in his house and bedroom no less. Every shred of privacy he had was being shoved aside, and he was going to be like an amoeba in some petri dish. Every time he looked at Zhou Mi, touched Zhou Mi, spoke to Zhou Mi, people would be analyzing. At least at first. Then it would just become common information, and people wouldn’t care. After a while of not caring, Zhou Mi would go on his way. And he’d have to play the stoic broken-hearted person, and continue on with his life.
And it had been a week. They’d eaten dinner together at the house twice, and the one night he’d been there early enough to relax, they’d sat in mutual silence in the library. Him on his laptop, Zhou Mi with book. And aside from the occasional tug on the covers, he couldn’t even tell most times that Zhou Mi was sleeping across the bed from him. His life was almost as normal, a week passing, week and a half. It seemed like Eeteuk nagged him constantly. Did you do this for Zhou Mi, or that for Zhou Mi, or show him around, or make sure he’s okay with this…
Mostly he got that it was Eeteuk’s attempt to make sure he was making some kind of a connection with Zhou Mi. Sometimes it came off more like Eeteuk thought Zhou Mi was some kind of mentally stunted spaniel that Kyuhyun had to keep from falling off a cliff. But the rest, it was just concern that they should look like they were more than strangers to others. Of course, if they were positing a whirlwind romance kind of thing, then strangers were exactly what they still were. Just without the imagined benefits of sweaty sex. The fleeting thought had come and gone that they should just have sex for the knowing, but if Zhou Mi sucked in the sack then all he’d have in his head when they were pretending to be dating was, “Wow, that really sucked.” And it wasn’t like Zhou Mi was some kind of escort where they could negotiate sexual favors. Not that he needed the occasional blowjob clouding his judgement on things anyway. He shoved aside the idea before it started to take on any kind of merit, and stood as Zhou Mi emerged from the bathroom.
The suit was sleek and perfectly fitted, covering Zhou Mi’s wrists and sitting just so at his shoes. Good shoes, also, hair carefully arranged, tie knotted and well placed. In other words, very little for Kyuhyun to pick at all. Unless he counted that piece of lint he brushed from Zhou Mi’s hip.
“Is it okay?”
He tilted his head up, perturbed again that he had to do so. Not so much a difference in height. Not that he had to gape upwards. But their chins were not level, that was for certain. Maybe that was something he could toss out if he got grilled, that he liked taller men. He breathed in a hint of some cologne, and let it out slowly.
“You look fine,” he said. “Let’s go.”
Thankfully no long drive, handing his keys to the waiting valet, and leading Zhou Mi up the short stairs to the private reception hall. There was live music being played from some piano he couldn’t see, waiters rounding with trays of hors d’oeuvres and drinks. He signaled one over as their host approached, making the minimum of pleasant greetings. He was never rude, not quite. But short? Yes. He was fine, yes, thank you for the invitation to this banal party that I’ll waste my time on, and by all means let’s keep doing business together.
“Who’s your friend?” the man’s pretty wife asked.
“This is Zhou Mi,” Kyuhyun said, passing Zhou Mi one of the cocktails in his hand. He pushed his hand into Zhou Mi’s a moment longer than was strictly necessary, their fingers sliding together for a moment. He pushed aside the flicker of interest that rattled through him. “But my friend, no. Lover.”
“Lover?” No less than three people turned to stare curiously at the loudly parroted response, before turning away but still obviously listening. “I’d heard rumors someone was living with you, but I didn’t give them any credence. This is the one, then? You play it close to the vest.”
“Yes,” he murmured. “Nice to see you.”
It was his arm on Zhou Mi’s elbow that led them away, knowing the fission of information was spreading too far, too fast to take back. He heard Zhou Mi blow out a breath and appreciated that he seemed to be holding up. One measly introduction, trying to remember names, faces.
“Zhou Mi, my date,” he introduced the smiling man to the next small crowd.
“Oh, how…how lovely,” the woman said, blinking at the both of them.
Yes, how nice after a hundred women to be stepping out with a man and flaunting it in the face of the business elite. Would they reject him for it? No. Once they got over the shock of it. The foibles of a young, rich prince. That was all.
“Zhou Mi, what is it that you do?”
“I’ve been working as a personal assistant, but I’m on leave now,” Zhou Mi said, detailing a company that was real and that Zhou Mi as part of his cover might actually work for. He knew that much, just enough to pass a question, but no more. He could just feign ignorance for anything else. Too busy getting to know him in other ways.
“Do you live in Seoul?”
“Yes. With Kyuhyun,” Zhou Mi answered politely.
That got, if anything, more gapes, politely hid behind napkins and glasses. It was like the world’s most bizarre sideshow, where they pretended not to react, and he pretended not to see it.
“Surely not for very long? Weren’t you dating the little Lee girl just a few weeks ago?”
“No, not very long,” Zhou Mi agreed.
“So fast. What was the rush?”
Kyuhyun looked at Zhou Mi, who had a curious, considering look in his eyes, as though he were waiting for Kyuhyun to speak and prepared to do so himself if Kyuhyun couldn’t come up with anything.
“He wasn’t like anyone I’d ever met,” Kyuhyun said, sliding his shoulder against Zhou Mi’s. And that was the honest truth. “You don’t let that get away.”
“It’ll answer a bunch of questions people had about you, anyway,” the man said. “Normally you wouldn’t even so much as touch one of your dates.”
Zhou Mi held still, for that he was grateful, even leaning in just a tad bit as Kyuhyun’s mouth brushed against the side of his mouth. And then squirming against him in feigned embarrassment as the man laughed at them.
“You two look more like my five year-old with a crush.”
Kyuhyun laughed, trying to be natural about it. His mind spun that in the best possible way. “I suppose. But we’re a little bit more than that.”
“Definitely older than five,” Zhou Mi murmured.
And without prompting, without Kyuhyun even having to look at him, Zhou Mi kissed him. His first instinct was to go for annoyance, because if it had been any previous date, it would have been rebuffed by coldness. No one took those kind of liberties with him. But his second realization was that he had a man, an attractive man, kissing him. It didn’t even matter how attractive, because it sent landing lights straight to his libido. It had been too long. Too long since he’d kissed someone that his body even wanted. Too long since he’d allowed attraction to be anything more than an annoyance, swatting it away. His breath shuddered out of him, forcing his spine to relax as he leaned back against the table. The smirk on his face was almost default, letting his gaze slide from Zhou Mi’s mouth. But the laugh that got torn from him, that was unexpected as Zhou Mi elbowed him with some silly expression on his face.
Whatever they’d done, the man in front of them seemed impressed. “Cho Kyuhyun laughing at a party? Now I’ve seen everything.”
Okay, impressed with something that wasn’t the kiss. Maybe there was more to it than they thought. A little practice, that was what they needed. How to make sure it looked like they were a couple. Perfect.
***
Author: Coley Merrin
Rating: R
Pairing: Zhou Mi/Kyuhyun
Genre: AU, Romance
Summary: To find a date that Kyuhyun can stomach is impossible - unless they hire one to pretend. But not even the perfect companion can stop years worth of threats, or keep their acting from becoming all too real.
***
Chapter One * Chapter Two * Chapter Three
***
Kyuhyun smoothed a muscle on the side of his head that was twitching. Eeteuk had a plan for every single thing in his life, it seemed. He had assumed that Eeteuk would be the one who took care of all of Zhou Mi’s issues, and got him moved in, and Kyuhyun would just monitor or step in when needed. At least until Eeteuk had verbally slapped him in the head with something that should’ve been blatantly obvious to him if he’d given it two seconds of thought.
He couldn’t exactly have his personal assistant move in his “lover” that he was apparently so wild for. At least, not without it feeling like a total setup. There were things that Eeteuk could do for Zhou Mi without his involvement, but a step like moving someone into his house was kind of a big one. Had any of the women he’d dated ever seen his bedroom? He didn’t think so, unless the housekeeper had given them a tour before some kind of party or function he’d been throwing. And he was letting someone into his bedroom to stay. It made him itchy, and made him wonder why he hadn’t protested more to start with. Especially when the maids pilfered one of the matching dressers from a spare room and dragged it into his. That was the big oh yeah moment in his head. Pretending to date someone, fine. Installing someone in his bedroom? Employee or not, the man wasn’t like some kind of modern sculpture he could just set in a corner and forget.
Maybe he could think of him as some kind of valet, but hell, not even valets slept in the same bed. He hadn’t stayed in a bed with anyone his whole life. A few nights of having someone sleep over, sure, but nothing long term.
But actually helping the man move in felt like he was signing his own death warrant. At least, if something went wrong he could blame himself as well, because it wouldn’t take more than a word to stop all of it. Right then, if he wanted to.
The apartment building was small, sort of out of the way, and squished between a couple of other unrelated buildings. Eeteuk had all but programmed the address in for him, ordering him out of his office. It was the weekend. Surely he ought to be able to do what he wanted? Moving a stranger into his bedroom didn’t even qualify. Eeteuk was always trying to tell him that he needed to learn delegation, but when he threw that back at Eeteuk on the way to his car, Eeteuk had just indicated that this situation wasn’t one of those times.
Zhou Mi was waiting for him outside, likely on Eeteuk’s tipoff, so that was something at least. Since it was the weekend, he’d gone in the office more casually dressed, so at least he wasn’t supposed to help Zhou Mi with his stuff in a tie. Though knowing Eeteuk, he likely had a change of casual clothing stashed somewhere in Kyuhyun’s office for him.
Zhou Mi glanced curiously behind him, at the Audi he’d driven up in. He found on a scale of annoyance that expensive, ostentatious cars garnered exactly the attention expected. Definitely more than wanted. It had four wheels, a motor, and some speed, and that was all he really needed.
“So how many trips with your stuff are we going to have to take?” he asked, wondering just how much stuff Zhou Mi had. Sure it wasn’t a tiny little two-seater coupe, but it wasn’t exactly going to haul furniture, either.
“I think everything should fit in there,” Zhou Mi said, leading him up the stairs. “The apartment came furnished, since it was short term, and it’s hard to pack a lot of things with me. I gave most of my food away, since Eeteuk told me I should.”
Kyuhyun saw why the apartment was temporary, since it was barely bigger than his armpit. And it wasn’t just that he was used to living in a big house, either. It was legitimately small. He actually had to edge around the tall suitcase and garment bag draped over it to get to the “kitchen” with its sink that he didn’t think he could actually spread his hand out in.
Zhou Mi was muscling the folded up mattresses into the cupboard, and dragging a couple of boxes out of the way. “This is it,” he said, sounding a little out of breath. "I’m not going to miss it. I didn’t even have a bathroom of my own.”
Kyuhyun made a noise that sounded like sympathy to his own ears. “Okay. Let’s get to it then.”
No matter what way they cut it, it was going to take more than one trip, so he and Zhou Mi both took a box, and since his felt like it was packed with rocks, he had no idea how Zhou Mi was carrying his own, bigger one down the steps. The trickle of sweat down his back was a trifling annoyance, as they jogged back up after getting the boxes into the trunk. Just barely. Zhou Mi inspected the cupboard, the few drawers and corners, and deemed it empty, letting Kyuhyun commandeer the garment bag, similarly heavy, while Zhou Mi dragged the suitcase. Both bags fit into the back seat, and he thought it was well-done, because if Zhou Mi had anything else, Zhou Mi would’ve had to carry it on his lap.
“I have to run and give my key and sign out with the landlord, okay?” Zhou Mi said. “I… I’ll be right back.”
He just leaned against the car and caught his breath as Zhou Mi dashed back inside. The man was two years older than him, and seemed to have plenty more energy. He was going to have to try and schedule those workouts a little more frequently. He’d turned the air conditioning on inside the car by the time Zhou Mi and his handbag slid inside.
“Sorry about that,” Zhou Mi breathed, buckling in. “I really appreciate you coming to get me. I was surprised when Eeteuk told me, but his reasoning made sense.”
“It always makes sense,” Kyuhyun sighed, turning out into the street. “That’s the problem with him. Just let me or one of the maids know if you need anything for storing your belongings. There’s a dresser for you, and part of the closet. Did Eeteuk look at your clothes?”
“Not yet. He said he would once I’d moved in, so it didn’t look weird.”
“That’s fine.” He thought about it a moment, and how he’d phrased it. “I don’t mean that you look tacky or anything. Sometimes I’d give a date a dress, or something. You’ll just need clothes if you’re going to have to endure the conference and who knows what else with me.”
Zhou Mi laughed. “No, I understand. I really appreciate you thinking of it. I definitely don’t want to look less than I should beside you. But if I’m keeping the clothes…am I keeping the clothes…? Maybe I should pay for them?”
Kyuhyun grunted, merging over to get to his house. “No. We’re not going to start talking about stuff like that. You need it for the job, I pay for it. And I certainly don’t need more suits, so they’ll be yours. You’ll have a car for your use, assuming you have a license, and the household staff at your disposal. And, I think you know the rest of the drill.”
“Let someone know if I need anything else. Yes, I will. Thank you.”
“Hopefully I’ll be the one thanking you,” he said, turning into his driveway. His back moaned at the thought of carrying that stuff into the house, but he told himself not to be a wimp and just do it.
At least there weren’t stairs, and that was a saving grace. Zhou Mi carried a box behind him as he wandered through the living room and back to the living quarters. Everything forward was open, for the express purpose of entertaining, but his room was cloistered back beyond, for privacy. His was the master suite, big enough for the extra large king bed, a couple of chairs for reading, a few sculptures, and of course the two dressers. The bathroom designed for two people, and the walk-in closet were off of one wall. He heaved the box between the two dressers, thinking Zhou Mi would get it sorted out.
“Well, this is it. Bedroom, sweet bedroom. It’s good for…sleeping, I guess. If you need-”
“Pony,” Zhou Mi blurted out.
Kyuhyun’s eyebrows rose. Hangers, a bookcase, that he expected. But that?
“Excuse me?”
Zhou Mi was waving one hand, like he was trying to bury his words as he gestured to the bedroom at large. “No, I don’t need- I mean, it’s almost big enough to keep a pony.”
That did bring a laugh. “I think my father had a different way to describe it. Blame him, though, because he’s the one who had it built.”
Zhou Mi’s shoulders had started to draw in a little, as he considered Kyuhyun. “What would you prefer to be called?”
That stopped him in his mental wanderings. “If you don’t call me by my name, that would be damn odd, wouldn’t it?”
Zhou Mi laughed. “Yes. But I mean when we’re alone.”
“No. There shouldn’t be any difference. Get used to calling me by name, and there won’t be any awkward slips of calling me Mr. Cho in front of people. We’re trying to make my reputation better, not screw it up more. And having to backtrack and pretend you call me that in bed, you might as well just call me Master and be done with it.”
Zhou Mi’s chin was actually quivering in amusement. “I don’t know if I could convincingly pretend to be into that. Kyuhyun.”
It sounded nice, with the little lilt in Zhou Mi’s voice. And he shoved that aside.
“Good. That’s out of the way. Let’s get your suitcase and clothes then, and you can get settled. I’m going back into the office to get some more work done. Feel free to wander. There’s a small pool, a gym. Go wild. A maid will let you know when dinner is served if I’m not back.”
Zhou Mi trotted after him as they went to get the last of the bags. “But you will be back tonight?”
He imagined rolling in late, as was pretty normal for him, finding Zhou Mi already passed out in his bed. And Zhou Mi didn’t even know what side of the bed he preferred. Or getting home earlier and having to listen to Zhou Mi fall asleep. He wasn’t sure which way was more awkward. The latter was certainly more polite. At least for the first day. Even, he reminded himself, if he was employing Zhou Mi.
“I’ll try to be home,” he said, hoping it wasn’t too grudging.
“Okay,” Zhou Mi said, wrestling his garment bag over the suitcase and shooting Kyuhyun a smile. “I can get this in by myself, then, since you wanted to go. The quicker you go, the quicker you get back, right?”
“That’s right. Okay. Have fun with that then.”
“Thank you, Kyuhyun.”
The last part he saw of Zhou Mi were his feet as he turned out of the garage. It had been an amusing exercise. The man was stronger than he looked, and had ethics, which was good. He didn’t feel the need to shake the man off his leg, which was also definitely a perk. Since he knew it would be right into Eeteuk’s lap that everything got shook. Still, it was only the first day. If Zhou Mi had questions, he’d answer them. One way or another, they had to work together, or it was useless. He thought they’d accomplished that pretty well today. He rolled his eyes. No, Eeteuk wasn’t always right.
***
Zhou Mi blew out a breath as Kyuhyun drove away. It would’ve been so much less awkward if Eeteuk had just come to help him move, or if he’d gotten a taxi instead, but he did realize that easier didn’t always make it better. It gave him a chance to learn a little more about Kyuhyun. Even if one of those things was considering the way the cloth stretched over his shoulders as he followed him down the stairwell. A little admiration was one thing, and it was healthy, and even good for the job and role he was supposed to portray. Just as long as he kept it to that. Just a little. Sometimes repeating “no, I can’t have that” to himself a thousand times worked, if it was a cookie or something. So he’d settle in at a comfortable level of hoping he at least liked his boss and pretend lover, and leave it at that.
And the house… The house. The living area and some sort of mingling party room were expansive, making his little temporary apartment look like someone’s linen closet. No wonder Kyuhyun had been surprised when Zhou Mi had let him in. If he’d been Kyuhyun, he’d have been claustrophobic. It was all modern and sort of bright, actually. Little touches of art and a magazine on the table that sort of gave it a lived-in feel. Sort of. But he had kept up with Kyuhyun, puffing under the weight of the box in his arms, until they got into Kyuhyun’s room.
That was way more surprising. Decorated in a warm green, blacks, grays and cream, it was big. No surprise. The bed was big, too, covered with some soft-looking green silk spread. Obviously Kyuhyun hadn’t decorated it himself, but seeing it made Zhou Mi think he’d seen a little insight into Kyuhyun’s mind. It was clean, yes, but it also felt somewhat homey. There was a whimsical sculpture of a turtle climbing what looked like a branch in one corner, and dark, very modern dressers. That was where Kyuhyun had dropped his box. His spot. It shuddered in him as he very carefully maneuvered his suitcase in, making sure he wasn’t making any marks on the wood floor. He closed the door to the bedroom behind him and just sat, leaning against his garment bag. Home. Another form of home. Kyuhyun’s home, that he was sharing. He sniffed the air, trying to peg a defining scent, but the air was light, well circulated. It probably smelled more of Kyuhyun in the bathroom, or even the closet.
He got to his feet with some regret, checking the drawers and finding them pleasant.
He laid down his suitcase with a grunt. “I have too many clothes.”
***
With most everything tucked away into drawers, he actually went into the walk-in closet. Boggling at the neatly pressed, hanging shirts, the suits, and things on shelves. Shoes. From brightly polished work shoes to well-broken in jogging shoes. He kept himself from kneeling down right there in thanks that someone would design a room like that. Just a room. For a closet. He laughed imagining asking Kyuhyun if he could just bed down right in there. There was even a nice wide bench, too. He felt kind of sheepish, hanging his own sparse assortment of clothes that needed to be hung up, across from Kyuhyun’s. Though, from Kyuhyun’s words, he’d be getting some new ones. The thought both thrilled and shamed him. He wasn’t used to getting something for nothing, but he did also know that Kyuhyun needed someone who wasn’t self conscious about their clothes beside him. Clothes did not always make the man, but there was the perception of them. There was even an area in the closet for suitcase storage, and he sort of fell in love right there. With a room.
His little tote bag went with him into the bathroom, glad to see there was a little cabinet on one end of the two sink-counter that was empty. It was a pretty typical bathroom. Tub, large though it was, shower, toilet, hooks for robes. Not ostentatious, but considering its uses, it didn’t have to be. He was still left with a box of other things. Books, mementos, pictures, electronics. But that, he felt, could wait. It was the first day. Just getting his clothes unpacked was a good accomplishment.
And his gun as well. He peeked through the millimeter crack he’d opened in the drawer on one side of Kyuhyun’s bed and found things in it, and checked the other to find it empty. He wasn’t snooping, because he didn’t even see what was in it. It wasn’t the drawer he was going to be using, but the cabinet itself. Something for his locked case to be in without getting any sort of attention from the maids or Kyuhyun. He wasn’t even sure that he needed it, only that he was required to have it on orders from his boss. He imagined their positions were reversed, and decided that Kyuhyun was a brave man. Allowing a stranger into his house, his bedroom. Something deeply personal. He thought of the picture of Kyuhyun smiling in the file, and wondered in all the years he’d been pushing people away, how many of them had seen that expression. He was a total stranger and he had access to the most personal places that a person’s home could have. And he was determined not to abuse that trust.
So he did not, as Kyuhyun suggested, explore. Being let into the bedroom was one thing, actually exploring the house was another. At least on the first day. Even if curiosity was dancing down his spine. A pool? A gym? He had known Kyuhyun’s home was large, and he had even seen pictures of it, but it went far beyond his expectations. Rather than obsess, he sank into one of the dark gray, sturdy if not extremely comfortable, chairs in the room, and opened a book. He’d read until it was time to eat, or until Kyuhyun came home, whichever was first. Though, from the antsy way Kyuhyun wanted to get back to the office, he had a feeling which of those it’d be.
***
And he was right. A maid had come to fetch him for dinner, knocking discreetly at the doorframe and leading him to the smaller, more intimate dining nook. A dinner for at least two or three was laid out for him, as they brought what he had asked to drink - tea - and then disappeared as soon as it was all settled. It was like being in the world’s most efficient, most polite, single-customer restaurant. It was very clean, very typical Korean food, he thought as he nibbled at a spicy rice cake. Very good, but he had expected that. Eeteuk had said he could let the kitchen know if he wanted specific things, but he thought to give that time as well. Get the lay of the land, and then do what he had to.
He debated, go to find someone to let them know he was done, or just get up to go. But before he was most of the way to the door they had served from, someone emerged to let him to know he could go, and would he like tea served to the bedroom?
But he went back to wait. And wait. And wait. Reading his book, falling asleep in the middle of a chapter and waking as the book crashed to floor. He showered then, eying the bed with some want, but determined not to even touch it until Kyuhyun gave him instruction. For all he knew, he really was sleeping in the closet. Kyuhyun might have a preference on the side of the bed. Who knew.
Luckily the door opened before he had a chance to imagine stretching out on the floor for very long. Kyuhyun, rubbing the back of his neck as he closed the door, did not seem surprised nor particularly pleased to see Zhou Mi sitting there. Not unhappy either, though still tired.
“The living room is probably more comfortable for reading,” Kyuhyun said, his voice scratchy with disuse. “You’re not some concubine confined here. You did eat?”
“I did, thank you.” At least Kyuhyun cared. A little. And he had a thought. “Did you eat?”
“I had a snack.”
Well, that carried a wide range of meanings, but it wasn’t really in him to argue. Yet. Eeteuk seemed to think he would be responsible in some way for Kyuhyun’s wellbeing, but he had to find equilibrium first. He waited, massaging his knees as Kyuhyun dressed for bed, emerging in nothing but pajama pants.
And in watching him pull back the side of the covers nearest the bathroom, Zhou Mi discovered what side of the bed was to be his for sure.
The mattress cradled him, and with the light off, he heard nothing but Kyuhyun’s deep, even breathing. Asleep almost as soon as he hit the pillow, Zhou Mi thought. He willed himself into sleep as well.
***
Zhou Mi came out of sleep with a jerk, feeling for the edge of the bed to give him some definition of where he was. He saw the faint light of the fire alarm on one wall, the echoes of faint light on the floor from beneath the dark curtains. And his stomach growled.
Apparently he’d expended more energy than he’d thought, if he was hungry in the middle of the night. No wonder he’d woken up. He hadn’t even wanted to explore on his own, but he did know where the kitchen was. Maybe there was a piece of fruit or something he could snag to hold him. Or at least something to drink. He slipped out of bed as silently as possible, laying the covers back down and shuffling into his slippers.
The rest of the house wasn’t nearly as dark as the bedroom, but he trod carefully, not wanting wanting to trip over anything or wake up the household. He slipped into the open kitchen door, seeing the carefully laid out room with stove, oven, large double refrigerator and sinks. He looked around like someone was going to stop him, opening the fridge door, looking until he found a container of the soup from dinner. Just a small matter of heating some up.
The closing of the microwave door seemed inordinately loud, and the soup wasn’t as warm as he’d have liked, but it was enough. And he sighed in contentment as he ate. Being in an unfamiliar place always unsettled him for a while. And if it meant a few midnight meals, well. As long as he didn’t get in trouble for it. He would settle out his new-job jitters with time. He could keep some snacks in the closet and go for those in the future, maybe. He’d have to look into it.
The spoon clattered as his whole hand spasmed, nearly dropping the bowl as Kyuhyun appeared out of the hallway like some pale wraith before actually getting some form to him in the light of the kitchen. Why were Kyuhyun’s pajamas pants so light? He swallowed carefully, trying to breathe, and pressing a hand to his galloping heart.
“Kyuhyun.”
“Sorry, did I scare you?” The expression didn’t indicate that he was sorry, more of a smirk on Kyuhyun’s face. “I woke up and noticed you were gone and thought you might’ve gotten lost.”
He laughed a little, setting the bowl on the counter so he could wipe off his suddenly damp palms.
“No. I woke up, and it’s just odd in a new place sometimes. I get anxious, and I get hungry. I didn’t want to wake you up, I’m sorry. Um. And this is okay?”
Kyuhyun pushed himself up so that he was sitting on the counter. “You getting food? No, you have to eat outside. Of course it is. You want something, get it.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you repeat that so often. I just want to be sure.”
“I get it. I’d be like that in someone else’s house, too. It’s the first day, so I’ll cut you some slack.”
Again, that smirk, Kyuhyun grabbing an apple out of a basket and shining it a little on the fabric of his pajama pants. Feeling steadier, he picked his soup back up and continued to eat, Kyuhyun crunching away on the apple in front of him, feet gently swaying. The strangest midnight snack, ever.
“So what attracted you to me?” Zhou Mi asked. Kyuhyun stared at him like he’d grown another head. “No, I don’t mean- I mean, someone might ask us. It was really quick, us meeting, me moving in. It might help to have an answer.”
“Oh. That’s a good idea. I’ll have to think about that,” Kyuhyun said. “We’ll pull it out if we have to. I guess you need to think of something, too.”
“I will. At least we have a while before we have to go anywhere together?”
Maybe they’d find some level of comfortable. Though, it wasn’t like they’d been married for ten years or something. Some level of getting-to-know each other was normal.
“Yeah. At least we do.”
Kyuhyun threw aside his apple core, directing Zhou Mi to the sink.
“While we’re both awake, I’ll show you the rest of the house. Then tomorrow you can come out of the hole,” Kyuhyun said, urging Zhou Mi out of the door ahead of him.
Kyuhyun pointed out where the keys to the extra car were kept for Zhou Mi’s use, where extra jackets and household supplies were. And, leading him to the furthest point, showed him where the room with exercise equipment was, the shower room, and the half basketball court beyond that.
“The pool is covered and heated,” Kyuhyun said. “It’s heated for use year-round. There’s a hot tub, and small sauna, but they need to be prepared. One of the maids can show you how if you want to use them.”
“You said small pool?”
His definition of small, and Kyuhyun’s were clearly different, he thought, looking back at the wide, still pool before they went back into the main part of the house.
“Smaller,” Kyuhyun said, acknowledging his question as he pushed into a room closer to bedroom. “And this room is the library/catch all room. I come here to relax when I have time. It’s more secluded than the living room, so you can store your books here, or whatever. There’s a tv, games. If you see it, use it. Most of the other rooms are spare bedrooms or just storing stuff. So that’s the main part of the house. If you get lost, send up a flare.”
“Thank you, Kyuhyun. It’s a beautiful home.”
“It’s a house,” Kyuhyun said shrugging.
They went into the bedroom together, Kyuhyun crawling into bed with a groan.
“Sleep well,” he told Kyuhyun softly, edging for the bathroom.
He got little more than a grunt in reply. Perhaps he should’ve turned down the tour, but it was hard to say no when Kyuhyun was leading him around. And he was already awake. With any luck, Kyuhyun would be able to make that sleep up.
The covers were only half over Kyuhyun when he came back out, and he paused, indecision torturing him. If he moved the blankets, he could wake Kyuhyun up. If he didn’t, Kyuhyun could get sick. Slowly, very slowly, he lifted the edge of the silk comforter, edging it, edging it, until it fell fully over Kyuhyun’s body. And standing there barely breathing to make sure he hadn’t woken Kyuhyun up. He looked like a child, smashed face-down into the pillow. He definitely was no child, with more power than Zhou Mi could ever dream of wanting.
But he fell asleep on his own side of the bed, finally feeling at peace.
***
The infernal beeping was going to drive him crazy and Zhou Mi tried to burrow deeper in the pillows but it wasn’t working. He looked up, wild, trying to spot Kyuhyun, who was sitting up and silencing the racket.
“Timizit?” he croaked.
“5AM,” Kyuhyun told him. “Go back to sleep. I’ll be back later.”
5AM? That meant… Kyuhyun had gotten less than five hours of sleep? He intended to protest, or worry, or something. But he passed out again too quickly to do so.
And it was Eeteuk who woke him the next time, sending him scrambling out of bed to find his trilling phone, only to listen to the irate man on the other end.
“He looks like a truck backed over him. What time did he come home from working last night?”
“It was almost midnight,” Zhou Mi said, hoping he wasn’t breaking some kind of confidentiality clause between him and Kyuhyun. Though he suspected that Eeteuk either had the information already from building logs or could have gotten it from Kyuhyun himself if he had so desired. “He was up a while in the middle of the night, though.”
“Not sleeping. Ugh. I’m going to try sending him home earlier tonight. Tie him to the bed if you have to.”
“Isn’t that too soon?” Zhou Mi tried joking weakly.
Eeteuk cackled. “Frankly, no. He could probably use that, too. Ah, he’s calling. Bye!”
Zhou Mi sighed, tossing his phone aside. That still gave him hours to fill, but he need to do some shopping, pick up his suit that he’d been fitted for. He’d get out a while, admire the closet a while longer, and if he had to fight with Kyuhyun, he would. Even if it was a subtle fight.
***
He was eating dinner when Kyuhyun came in. Eyes so tired they almost looked bruised, as he took a seat across from Zhou Mi and poured himself a cup of tea.
“How was your day?” Zhou Mi ventured.
“Fine. Meetings. The usual.”
“Is that the time you normally go in?”
“Sometimes, if I know I have a conference call with another country, or work that needs to be done in preparation of a big board meeting.”
“So you won’t have to go in so early tomorrow morning?”
Kyuhyun seemed to hesitate, his chopsticks pausing in the noodles he’d served himself. “No, I guess I don’t have to. Sometimes it’s nice to get work done before everyone shows up.”
“But to stay until after everyone has left?”
Kyuhyun rolled his eyes in a rather knowing manner. “I knew Eeteuk would be after you before too long.”
“It’s something I kind of need to know about?” Zhou Mi said, poking at his own food. “Maybe you could tell me a little about your job, what you do? I looked up the company, did a little bit of research, so I know you do shipping. But at parties or something, I might be asked about your job, and it’d be nice to be able to say something less generic. I doubt anyone thinks we’d discuss all the dry details, but you’d probably tell me a little?”
If they were lovers, that is. If it was some kind of whirlwind romance, spur of the moment decision to have him move in, then of course they’d discuss all the unique areas of their life. The physical parts were all well and good, but couldn’t see Kyuhyun having someone move in on just that. Unless Zhou Mi was supposed to be better in bed than he thought he was.
Kyuhyun was no stranger to describing his company, and he walked Zhou Mi through a typical day of paperwork, decisions, ship reports and troubleshooting and meetings. He wondered how many times that Kyuhyun had to describe just that for investors or other people. He hated to think of someone’s life being taken over by responsibilities, even if they were to something they were dedicated to.
“You took over for your father?”
Kyuhyun inclined his head in agreement. “Yes, when the doctor told him he needed to reduce his stress or die in the company’s arms. I had already been working beside him for a few years, but he took six months to really get me installed, and then he went to half time for a year, and then I took over fully. He and my mother and younger sister are off having a tropical vacation for the next month or so.”
How did it feel to give up half a life, and health, for the sake of his family? Of course, for his family, Kyuhyun had done what was necessary. Though he wondered how much that Kyuhyun did that was not strictly necessary. Because he felt he had to step into his father’s shoes.
“Do you ever regret it?”
“He’s learned how to be happy doing like he is now. My mom is able to cajole him into things. I think they worry that I’ll end up doing the same thing as he did. It’s just a really busy time for the company. I can’t take the time to train someone to come up under me to take some of the load off, not yet.”
“I imagine he said the same thing most of the time he was working.”
“He built the company from when he could barely employ a single person, and now we employ thousands. He always had the mentality that he’d do as much as humanly possible.”
“And you can break that cycle.”
Kyuhyun set his chopsticks down. “Yeah.”
A clear end to talking about his family. All he could do was lighten the mood as much as possible. He was the nail that was sticking out too far in the board of Kyuhyun’s life, and he didn’t want to risk getting beaten back in too far, definitely not before he had completed his job. He had already begun to plan the house that he wanted to provide his parents when he walked away. Maybe his mother wouldn’t get a closet as grand as Kyuhyun’s, but it would be good enough.
“Maybe you could put me in a box and ship me home to my parents every now and again,” he suggested slyly.
“That would require a big box, but I think we could handle it.”
That smirk again. In the office, it had seemed like an affectation, like some kind of expression put on as someone who was used to being in power. It still was that, to some extent. But he wondered if he was coloring it with his own impressions of Kyuhyun. That he was a man who worked too hard, and had too few defenses against bad judgement calls, ones that benefited the company, but not necessarily himself. Maybe it seemed outwardly mocking, but he wondered how much of it was directed within. And still, the expression on Kyuhyun had its own appeal. Kyuhyun fell asleep on the bed still fully clothed, and all Zhou Mi could really do was spread a blanket over him, and not long after, follow him into sleep.
***
Most of the time he was able to put Zhou Mi’s existence out of his head entirely. Put it in a box, shove it aside, keep working. That first night back at home, home had just felt different. The empty box in the garage, apprehension opening the door. Finding Zhou Mi in his pajamas had been one of those moments. That chair in his bedroom was definitely more form than function. He’d felt a little put out at first, that he was expected to play tour guide.
But he got, then, that Zhou Mi saw it as respect. Respect not to wallow on someone’s bed before given the go-ahead, respect not to wander as though he were owner of a space. Even dogs had to be shown their territory at times.
As an executive, the decisions he made were not usually made blindly, but they were made decisively. So even if he didn’t understand Zhou Mi’s unwillingness to do what Kyuhyun had offered, he appreciated the decision itself, and the integrity behind that. To some people, houses, things, were sacred. Zhou Mi projected that onto Kyuhyun, but how could he have known that it wasn’t the truth?
Zhou Mi did whatever he did with his time while Kyuhyun was at work, but he did notice the tailor’s tag in the closet. The new suit, for the little cocktail party they were attending. Something small, not overwhelming. Just a toe in the water, which would send ripples, tides, out to everyone. Cho Kyuhyun had taken a lover, a man, had installed him in his house and bedroom no less. Every shred of privacy he had was being shoved aside, and he was going to be like an amoeba in some petri dish. Every time he looked at Zhou Mi, touched Zhou Mi, spoke to Zhou Mi, people would be analyzing. At least at first. Then it would just become common information, and people wouldn’t care. After a while of not caring, Zhou Mi would go on his way. And he’d have to play the stoic broken-hearted person, and continue on with his life.
And it had been a week. They’d eaten dinner together at the house twice, and the one night he’d been there early enough to relax, they’d sat in mutual silence in the library. Him on his laptop, Zhou Mi with book. And aside from the occasional tug on the covers, he couldn’t even tell most times that Zhou Mi was sleeping across the bed from him. His life was almost as normal, a week passing, week and a half. It seemed like Eeteuk nagged him constantly. Did you do this for Zhou Mi, or that for Zhou Mi, or show him around, or make sure he’s okay with this…
Mostly he got that it was Eeteuk’s attempt to make sure he was making some kind of a connection with Zhou Mi. Sometimes it came off more like Eeteuk thought Zhou Mi was some kind of mentally stunted spaniel that Kyuhyun had to keep from falling off a cliff. But the rest, it was just concern that they should look like they were more than strangers to others. Of course, if they were positing a whirlwind romance kind of thing, then strangers were exactly what they still were. Just without the imagined benefits of sweaty sex. The fleeting thought had come and gone that they should just have sex for the knowing, but if Zhou Mi sucked in the sack then all he’d have in his head when they were pretending to be dating was, “Wow, that really sucked.” And it wasn’t like Zhou Mi was some kind of escort where they could negotiate sexual favors. Not that he needed the occasional blowjob clouding his judgement on things anyway. He shoved aside the idea before it started to take on any kind of merit, and stood as Zhou Mi emerged from the bathroom.
The suit was sleek and perfectly fitted, covering Zhou Mi’s wrists and sitting just so at his shoes. Good shoes, also, hair carefully arranged, tie knotted and well placed. In other words, very little for Kyuhyun to pick at all. Unless he counted that piece of lint he brushed from Zhou Mi’s hip.
“Is it okay?”
He tilted his head up, perturbed again that he had to do so. Not so much a difference in height. Not that he had to gape upwards. But their chins were not level, that was for certain. Maybe that was something he could toss out if he got grilled, that he liked taller men. He breathed in a hint of some cologne, and let it out slowly.
“You look fine,” he said. “Let’s go.”
Thankfully no long drive, handing his keys to the waiting valet, and leading Zhou Mi up the short stairs to the private reception hall. There was live music being played from some piano he couldn’t see, waiters rounding with trays of hors d’oeuvres and drinks. He signaled one over as their host approached, making the minimum of pleasant greetings. He was never rude, not quite. But short? Yes. He was fine, yes, thank you for the invitation to this banal party that I’ll waste my time on, and by all means let’s keep doing business together.
“Who’s your friend?” the man’s pretty wife asked.
“This is Zhou Mi,” Kyuhyun said, passing Zhou Mi one of the cocktails in his hand. He pushed his hand into Zhou Mi’s a moment longer than was strictly necessary, their fingers sliding together for a moment. He pushed aside the flicker of interest that rattled through him. “But my friend, no. Lover.”
“Lover?” No less than three people turned to stare curiously at the loudly parroted response, before turning away but still obviously listening. “I’d heard rumors someone was living with you, but I didn’t give them any credence. This is the one, then? You play it close to the vest.”
“Yes,” he murmured. “Nice to see you.”
It was his arm on Zhou Mi’s elbow that led them away, knowing the fission of information was spreading too far, too fast to take back. He heard Zhou Mi blow out a breath and appreciated that he seemed to be holding up. One measly introduction, trying to remember names, faces.
“Zhou Mi, my date,” he introduced the smiling man to the next small crowd.
“Oh, how…how lovely,” the woman said, blinking at the both of them.
Yes, how nice after a hundred women to be stepping out with a man and flaunting it in the face of the business elite. Would they reject him for it? No. Once they got over the shock of it. The foibles of a young, rich prince. That was all.
“Zhou Mi, what is it that you do?”
“I’ve been working as a personal assistant, but I’m on leave now,” Zhou Mi said, detailing a company that was real and that Zhou Mi as part of his cover might actually work for. He knew that much, just enough to pass a question, but no more. He could just feign ignorance for anything else. Too busy getting to know him in other ways.
“Do you live in Seoul?”
“Yes. With Kyuhyun,” Zhou Mi answered politely.
That got, if anything, more gapes, politely hid behind napkins and glasses. It was like the world’s most bizarre sideshow, where they pretended not to react, and he pretended not to see it.
“Surely not for very long? Weren’t you dating the little Lee girl just a few weeks ago?”
“No, not very long,” Zhou Mi agreed.
“So fast. What was the rush?”
Kyuhyun looked at Zhou Mi, who had a curious, considering look in his eyes, as though he were waiting for Kyuhyun to speak and prepared to do so himself if Kyuhyun couldn’t come up with anything.
“He wasn’t like anyone I’d ever met,” Kyuhyun said, sliding his shoulder against Zhou Mi’s. And that was the honest truth. “You don’t let that get away.”
“It’ll answer a bunch of questions people had about you, anyway,” the man said. “Normally you wouldn’t even so much as touch one of your dates.”
Zhou Mi held still, for that he was grateful, even leaning in just a tad bit as Kyuhyun’s mouth brushed against the side of his mouth. And then squirming against him in feigned embarrassment as the man laughed at them.
“You two look more like my five year-old with a crush.”
Kyuhyun laughed, trying to be natural about it. His mind spun that in the best possible way. “I suppose. But we’re a little bit more than that.”
“Definitely older than five,” Zhou Mi murmured.
And without prompting, without Kyuhyun even having to look at him, Zhou Mi kissed him. His first instinct was to go for annoyance, because if it had been any previous date, it would have been rebuffed by coldness. No one took those kind of liberties with him. But his second realization was that he had a man, an attractive man, kissing him. It didn’t even matter how attractive, because it sent landing lights straight to his libido. It had been too long. Too long since he’d kissed someone that his body even wanted. Too long since he’d allowed attraction to be anything more than an annoyance, swatting it away. His breath shuddered out of him, forcing his spine to relax as he leaned back against the table. The smirk on his face was almost default, letting his gaze slide from Zhou Mi’s mouth. But the laugh that got torn from him, that was unexpected as Zhou Mi elbowed him with some silly expression on his face.
Whatever they’d done, the man in front of them seemed impressed. “Cho Kyuhyun laughing at a party? Now I’ve seen everything.”
Okay, impressed with something that wasn’t the kiss. Maybe there was more to it than they thought. A little practice, that was what they needed. How to make sure it looked like they were a couple. Perfect.
***