i wish i had that song.. now i'm repeating amazon's little clip of it over and over heh. how sad is that ( Read more... )

i can't find nico. i keep expecting him to pop up somewhere but now i'm really thinking he won't come back. the other ones have been weird. i think they know he's gone. here i am crying over a cat. i already miss him. so much.

i don't know how we'll tell my sister.

today has been an actually good day. i would write about it but my head is aching and it'd probably be boring to ya'll anyways ;) maybe later.

night.

loneliness, your lips and the two coins of your eyes..

college visiting was good but this doesn't feel like it's been a real break. at least the weekend's coming soon! heeheeh yay ( Read more... )

i get too excited too quickly. i'm overly optimistic and think i can change things, that they'll work out, even when i don't fully know what's going on. and then there's the let down.

when all else fades out, the relics remain - in the light, as memories i don't want to forget, and the dark as things that have left me behind.

when i was walking home today, there were NINE op cop cars and another unmarked one at lombard and lake. what requires ten police cars? wow. that was a bit scary ( Read more... )

the food in my stomach is reminding me of the movie afterschool. not good. such a great movie though. "my sassy girl". good times.

mexico, right? mexico. please.

you never would have told me. i'm such an idiot sometimes. i need this five day break from school. i think i need more than that.

está bien, está bien.

i see that undeniable face staring up at me, like i'm the only thing that's ever loved him. he jumps in my lap and nuzzles his head into my sweatshirt, tries to kiss my chin. when i do homework, he positions himself right under my feet and lays there.

chill as the dawn breaks

as someone sets light to the first fire of autumn
we settle down to cut ourselves apart.
cough and twitch from the news on your face
and some foreign candle burning in your eyes

lose yourself in lines dissecting love

there are some things you just can't ever let yourself say, regardless of whether they're true.

i need to keep more things to myself.

i think i am starting to understand myself better.

i know how heartbroken i will be when someone else takes my place.

is this the final good-bye?

unrelated thoughts, of course.