my fish, chewbacca, died today. my mom cleaned the tank after not doing it in awhile, and he died shortly after. she sat be down and told me. this may would've been one year of me having him.

i'm tired of being yelled at. i'm tired of crying.

listen to the sound of hearts breaking...

i just put in four gauge pinchers. i used baby lotion. that was probably a mistake. these hurt the worst though putting in. i think fours are a great deal bigger than sixes. i went from tens to sixes and now fours without any problems ( Read more... )

i received my first ticket today, from a motorcycle cop. no warning. i was late to school. it's 181.50

i hate this town.

my report card ruled. all a's one b, 19th in a class of 354654564564 people.

blake left for daytona today. since he's been here these past 4/5 days, i've been happier. i'm sick and tired, literally, of people telling me what i should do. especially people like my mom, or my aunt. i wish i could do what i wanted, and i wish they would support me with whatever i choose to do ( Read more... )

decisions are starting to slowly, but surely be made. today made me hurt, a lot. i was alone for the majority of it, and i know who my real friends are, to say the least ( Read more... )

i've realized today how so much has changed. i think keeping old journals i've had is something i'll never regret. although it does hurt, it also reminds me of the good times i've had in my life. a.k.a.- hanging out with scott and maria ALOT, and basically living with alison and watching movies all of the time ( Read more... )

i can't take care of myself. i wish i was strong. i've never been strong enough..or maybe i've just never been alone. i've been fooled so many times. my heart is broken. i think it's been that way for a long time now..i just haven't realized it. nothing good ever happens to me. i need to accept it. things can go so well and within a moments ( Read more... )

i miss my old friends shane, lane, and josh.

target really really sucks.

life is a lot different now. i'm not so sure i like it. i miss more school. my mom's boyfriend lives here. we have a big couch and big tv. we have like every television channel on the planet. ashlyn goes to after school care. my hair is red, and black underneath. i eat less. i get full faster. i'm tired all of the time. i'm not as happy as i could ( Read more... )

life is changing, slowly, for the better. i never thought this day would come.