Creeped out,
Stressed out,
Drama isn't worth shit anymore.

What is truth, or lies?
And who...
I need to b e alone,
There is a pain in my chest I haven't felt in a long time.
I trusted you would never be the one to put it there.

Strength, theory.
Circumstantial.
Head aches.
Physical sickness and exhaustion.

Ugh.

Really, that's all I think I can say right now.  I need to figure my life out, get some goals, something to focus on, and then do it.  I'm working out, but I'm still depressed, I thought it would feel good, and it does, while I'm doing it, but I don't know what's wrong with me right now.

I'm crazy.  I feel crazy, but then again crazy people don ( Read more... )

Babies.  Everyone around me is getting pregnant... fuck that.  Excuse the blunt phrasing, but really.  I'm 21, and at least ten of my friends ranging from 19 to 29 are getting pregnant, most of them from 20-23 though.  It's too early in the game for that shit, I have my entire life to make my life all about someone else, why not experience freedom ( Read more... )

The brain is physical, tangible, existing.  We know this, the brain is a physical part of us, constantly working and only acknowledged a fraction of the time; the reason I move my fingers and my eyes dart back and forth across the screen, I type, I delete I retype, I feel, I breath, I pause, I process, I know, I divulge, conclude, love.

My mind, ( Read more... )

Friday I go buy a gym membership, sign on for a year and pay for the first three months.  I chose 'Eclipse' because they have a tanning bed, and they are a 24 hour gym, andddd they're huge, offer tons of classes, and over all the best gym in town.  The tanning bed really gets me excited though, apparently I should just bring a cleaner for the glass ( Read more... )

Different person today.  I'm happy, and in love, we poked fun back and forth all day, and you giggled with me, and I made faces at you.  Innocence,  I love when I feel like we're teenagers again.  We keep procrastinating cleaning the house, but fuck it, we're both happy hear in our clutter-free living room, I watching 90's sitcoms and you playing ( Read more... )

Anger.

It's not something I like to admit I feel, although I suppose I wouldn't be emotionally healthy if I didn't experience it at all.  Lately I've grown bitter, and continuously more angry, mostly at him.  Then after anger comes guilt, for being angry, because I feel like I'm in touch enough with myself not to let my emotions overcome me.  But I ( Read more... )