So this last year since graduating has been strange. Nothing I do feels right, nothing sits well. The Bay Area doesn't feel like home. I don't like the weather. I have terrible allergies. I want to go to the beach all the time. I miss knowing where things are, time in my car to sing, not being constantly surrounded by people buildings ( Read more... )

I'm thinking maybe too much time alone in Brentwood is not healthy. I begin ruminating and paying too much attention to my body. I don't know what I'm really feeling and what I'm imagining ( Read more... )

I now know the point of life is not to make it through untouched, unscarred, and unbrokenhearted. I hope it's not too late.

I think I just dreamt that I was crazy. In my dream I was in the bathroom looking in the mirror, but when the mirror moved it looked like there was a curve in the mirror that I'd never noticed before. I moved the mirror on its hinge a few times to see what the problem was and as I did so I could see versions of myself behind me crying, angry, ( Read more... )

... because writing them down seems to focus me. I begin to plan how I'll get them rather than waiting for them to come along ( Read more... )

I think I'm through the lazy phase of my unemployment. I'm bored and being poor is getting old. There's a music school in the area. I'll see if I can teach beginning voice lessons. I'll also look for some incredibly small audio production and composing projects so I can get my feet wet in the biz ( Read more... )

So I was working as a contractor for two months at a company in SF. Today they called an "all hands" meeting and announced that a bunch of people would not be coming in tomorrow. I was expecting my job to end soon and maybe even some layoffs, so I wasn't too surprised. Back to the full-time job search ( Read more... )

Stayed in a hotel with a king size bed on Friday night. I think I need one now ( Read more... )

Hello LiveJournal. You have a lot of competition these days. And I'm less interesting ( Read more... )

You know when you're drunk and you wonder why you can't be this honest all the time? But then you wonder if you're actually being honest or if you're just drunk? My back was killing me so I gulped sign a gin and tonic, in the hopes of it mimicing a Vicodine. Well, it doesn't mimic the pain-killing aspect of vicodine, just the flopsy effects of ( Read more... )