I'm stuffing my face with all the food that reminds me of him. Now that he's gone. I can't help thinking that if I had done better on my midterms this wouldn't be happening.

there is so much work to do!! i don't think there's time for sleep. i wonder why i'm still such an idiot? i wasted the whole weekend!

do you think i can learn all of calc II in one night?

i'm pretty worried about my calculus final... i have less than 24 hours to learn more than a month's worth. if i had just gone to class it wouldn't be that hard. maybe it'll be ok ( Read more... )

bitter euphoria in the bathroom
and suddenly i'm you

i have to leave in about 15 minutes to meet about this presentation. there's a lot on my mind, but i feel like i want to keep it in there. i used to write a lot. words would just find their way out. but lately i just draw things. small creatures and trees with funny fruit, like floating hearts. right now i just want to let it be.

i'm glad he's in this class (the interesting one). otherwise the drive would be unbearable. it's an hour and a half both ways but it's worth it when we get there. on tuesdays we cram ourselves into a van and escape into the suburbs, where we put on boots and dig around in a stream for hours and hours ( Read more... )

he's an interesting guy. i have to try not to be so ice-cold. i'll see him tomorrow and i'll try to smile and be normal even though i'll be dressed in a waterproof jumpsuit.

i haven't talked to the other guy in a while, i don't want to think about it long enough to figure out how long. is it him who thinks that i don't want to be serious? i ( Read more... )

it's awkward being older than everyone else, expecially since i still look like a freshman. people are shocked when i tell them how old i am. i always have to explain myself. so i've just started pretending not to hear people when they ask ( Read more... )

i'm sort of in that state where nothing i do seems to matter. i've been leveled.

is it pathetic that i'll be 27 when i finally graduate from college? or that i can't forget about someone who probably never even thinks about me?

i am now a member of an international college honour society. my god ( Read more... )