This is only a tenth of my life so far

[crispinhelliong]

Assorted intriguing verbal intercourses today reminding me that if I were a normal person, my life would be half over, at least chronologically speaking. Lucky for me I plan to live to at least 400 (without aging much from here on out, of course

Comments

[elenoire_c]

Haha, that slug pic is SO wrong! Perhaps they think that people who attend that university won't know the difference that they put the glasses where apparently the slug has no eyes?

[crispinhelliong]

That's what I was thinking, that maybe they think we don't know the difference. Elitest bastards.

[christina_ricci]

Interesting.

[crispinhelliong]

Thank you. I thought so, too.

[miss_jessicka]

"Hi! I'm Candy, your Playboy slug for the night. May I see your key?"

Bathing in embalming fluid may not induce immortality but your skin is left with the prettiest, prettiest glow. I know, between both of us, we could probably come up with enough to fix even Ms. River's doomed flaps though I think the manipulated facial structure may be entirely out of our depths. Oh boo.

And yes. Yes you are.

[crispinhelliong]

I've gotten some eyestalks made, and have a pair especially for you.

But doesn't one smell awfully nasty after that? It might be worth it anyway.

Someone's got to be. Might as well be me.

[jspader]

How does one plan to live to 400 successfully? Are their life-extending properties of bottled water that I am not aware of at this moment in time? Please do let me in on your secret, granted it's not some sort of cult of enlightenment that you have to pay vast sums of money to get in on and the so-called "life-extension" is mental rather than physical. Not that I mind mental rather than physical in any respect, but I don't really want to live to 400 solely in my mind. That would be defeating

[miss_jessicka]

Please be sure to strap your babies in here, courtesy of Raymond Watts.

- Underpaid minion.

[crispinhelliong]

I'm honored and flattered and there.

*increases your salary*