i have a ghost latched onto my big toe // i'm taking the exit

chimay
champagne
gimlets
t.rex
motor city 5
church of misery
total debauchery

so i have a girlfriend now... cool, so cool, life is insane, cool stuff . . . . . .

when i work hard, i don't hate myself. i probably don't care as much about the rotten parts of my life as much as i do the fact that i sit and splash around in the puddles. gotta stay as dry as possible. or at least dry off once a day.

tired

i saw some young people today, isn't that a trip?

listening to t. rex a lot.

i tend to be disappointed in myself when i do not fulfill a day's potential. what i used to do was essentially scorch my mind free of any thoughts, or overload it to the point of disappointment being background radiation barely audible compared to great, thumping exhaustion. ceasing this is more difficult than i thought, but there's really only ( Read more... )

at 8:45 a.m. i awoke from a dream. the idyll on the bathroom floor underneath the covers ended, and i was back in my bed underneath the covers, without my beautiful (imaginary??) partner. i was somewhat drunk from red wine (the dream's one link to reality), her less, and i was getting excitable and warm under the covers and intoxicated in the ( Read more... )

how long can you keep something inside you? when does germination end and sub-surface rot set in? this is a general question and you can relate it to anything, but i wonder in an equally general sense if this is what makes things "old," in every one of that word's meanings.

didn't post in here every day like i briefly imagined, but still i have returned. yesterday i did nearly nothing but rest, and i've awoken at 3am feeling better than i expected. the biggest plus? the rest of the house is sleeping, and i have solitude... solitude! i hate being lonely, but god knows there are times i love being alone. that is usually ( Read more... )