awesome news. radiohead is headlining lollapalooza! as much as i don't want to shell out a ton of money for mostly bands i don't care about, i have to go. a lot of people say the 2001 grant park show, which is the same place they'll be playing, was one of their best. so huzzah ( Read more... )

i don't really have much to say, but i am literally bored to tears at work so i thought i'd try to distract myself ( Read more... )

it hasn't been this bad in awhile. i feel like a failure. i feel like nothing ( Read more... )

my "transitioning" phase has gone on far too long ( Read more... )

sometimes i feel excited about the future and the possibilities, but mostly i keep thinking, what have i DONE? although i have been feeling better the past few days and i think it's because i know i won't have to do this for much longer. i just don't want to be jobless for a million years. i can't afford to be jobless for a million years ( Read more... )

so i did it. i quit my job. maybe the scariest thing i've ever done. but i'm hoping to get my head on straight, conquer my anxiety, conserve my savings, and find the perfect job that doesn't make me hate my life. and, preferably, doesn't invole an oppressive office setting. god i hate florescent lights ( Read more... )

i woke up this morning feeling panicked. which is how i feel most of the time, these days, but this wasn't quite a paralyzing panic just an intense worry. what am i going to do? will i ever find a happiness that is derived from some sort of achievement or the satisfaction of knowing my place in the world? i know that if anything is ever going to ( Read more... )

my two weeks off were splendid. although not quite anxiety-free, which proves my anxiety is not totally related to my job. which i knew anyways. even so, it was SO great to sleep in, do nothing, cook, watch movies and generally feel like my time was MY time. i need to feel this way more often ( Read more... )

been a long time since i wrote from the home computer. i've been afraid someone will find this, and i'd rather take the chance that the IT guys at work know all about my problems than people i actually have to look at ( Read more... )

horribly depressed ( Read more... )