I used to think a lot... I used to feel a lot. I'm beginning to think Ben was right... this place stole my soul. And they've stolen my heart. And my mind has been filled with... nothing. I wish I had the words and I wish the release of the words would make it feel better. I need to feel something wonderful, not physical. I lack understanding and

It is ever increasingly surprising to me. I don't really even know what to say about it. Like. Lust. Love. Lose.

I am content. Sitting in my room listening to the pod on shuffle by myself... and it's the first time I've been content by myself in a very very long time. I'm content with the way things are with R... no more hatred, no more passionate desire... thank you for teaching me the value of apathy. I dread the day when I start caring again ( Read more... )

This rut went from feeling safe to dull, and now you're ready to take a leap into the unknown. Being open to the unexpected catapults you far from where you started. It's bumpy, it's exhilarating -- and you'll love it.

Is there something in the air? The water? A delay.

I don't want to be forgotten.
There's always a bittersweet conclusion.

I don't actually have time to be writing this, studying should definitely be taking priority. However I can't stop wondering what the obsession is with finding love and being in love. Why can't people just be happy by themselves? Why do we need others to make us feel complete? I mean yeah it feels great to be in love and it is wonderful to have ( Read more... )

I find myself wondering what happened to the girl that I used to be, I don't really know that she exists anymore, or if she does, she is somewhere deep in hiding. The girl that was an extreme optimist. Who hardly ever doubted the way things were and who knew that everything was going to work out eventually. I'm so unsure. I forget so much. My ( Read more... )

I want to know if it was worth it? If it will be worth it? Is it worth continuing? Am I capable of leaving it behind? Are you capable of doing what's necessary ( Read more... )

This year is finally ending and it is in fact the perfect end to a perfectly terrible year. Who are you suppose to trust if your best friend lies to you? Who are you suppose to love if the person you love continually breaks your heart? Whatever... I just hope this upcoming year is better than the last.

I can't even begin to count the times you've crossed my journal. I don't want to recall when things were good. The person that I was drastically changed when I met you. I can't change the way things have been. I don't know how things will turn out. You're still unattainable and I should have follow my instincts from the beginning. Seemingly, too ( Read more... )