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[daisyclover]

I broke up with lee on sunday. It's over, for good, never going back. I've had enough. I am moving out this week. Everything is gone except my dresser and some boxes. I don't know what to feel or think. I am blindly going and i feel empty, sad, lost, angry, happy, free and liberated all at once. Two years of being together and this is how it ends

Comments

[kfs_one]

i am more proud of you than you'll ever really know. and you don't have to do this alone... there are so many people that love you, care for you, and would literally do anything in their power for you. they are what matter. they are what will help you. take all of them in. don't do it alone.... by the way, i'm one of them.

i love you, my dear. you can do anything!

thankyou

[daisyclover]

Thank you so much Kristin. I am having a really hard time. I feel alone, yet it's still fresh that I need to be alone. I am a mess. I cry for no reason. I am doubting, but I know I did the right thing and have to stick with it. I just feel wierd because I am so sad, but I am the one who left. It was my choice. I thought I would be happier. It is hard to smile sometimes. I am afraid to go to work, because I am afraid I will just cry all over. Thank you for what you said and for being here. I really appreciate knowing that I have a friend like you. I hope you are doing well.

[eastbaysteve]

*hugs* to you.

hi!

aww thanks

[daisyclover]

Hi. I just realized that I only post when I'm sad. But yeah. How are you? Are you still living by the cookie palace?

[vintagebanana]

*throws one fist in the air* Damn the man Mya, damn the man.

I'm way proud of you. If you need someone to listen to you bitch, you've got my number. How can i say no to my Lydia?

Oh no he di'int

[daisyclover]

thanks honey. I love you. Yes, I go between alternating states of sadness and utter vile hatred. He is just a liar! He lies about everything. your remember how he screwed that cunt way back when...well, he's always talked to her, I hated it, and she moved to nebraska like 2 months ago right? So I found out that the DAY AFTER I broke up with him, he booked a flight to go to nebraska. AND he had the audacity tot ell me it wasn't how it looked. How fucking stupid does he think I am. Really? ANd there was this other bitch named daphne that I always had the worst feelings and paranoia about . She lives in oakland. On monday night, I came over to get my stuff out, and he was all dressed up and said he was going to the store at like 545. He was at a bar in oakland....and I bet with that bitch. I hate men!! OMG! He's so full of shit his eyes are brown. So I guess the last two years meant nothing to him, eventhough I gav and gave and gave. WELL. I guess I'm an ass for staying. Whatev, I'm just done. Now I ahve to go get tested because god

[sophistikid]

i haven't been on LJ in days. Are you alright?

[daisyclover]

I'm ok. I have so much shit in my head. I failed my math class, well I got a high d...almost a c. I'm totally fucked and can't go to chico in the fall like I have been planning. I dunno. I am surfing the web looking for answers if I can somehow by-pass this shit. I dunno. I feel horrible now, as I just found out my misfortune. I feel like a dumb idiot and I should just say fuck it cause I'll probably never get to college now. I'm pooh. The lee thing is just wierd. I moved home to my parents...yuck. but now that I probably won't be leaving in couple months I think I might look for a place. Lee wants me to come home. We have been talking and remaining friends, I love him and miss him, I just am hella confused. Yeah. Sorry to like flip out on you. But yeah. Any suggestions on the math stuff?? I hope you are doing good. Call me if youhave a free day. I miss you.

[sophistikid]

Dahling, I am free on Fridays, but if I need to switch around some things throughout the week to see you then I shall, I shall.

As for the math thing, register for a summer equivalent at like, DVC or something and do it right now right now. If you pass it before registration at Chico, then you should be okay.

I'm glad you and Lee are still friends but be careful there... like you said, you knew how it really was for a long time, and you just needed to do something about it on your own time. I'm really proud of you for not only doing something about it, but having the sense to pace yourself. If another big decision concerning him needs to happen, pace yourself again, yeah?

I miss you too dearest and btw, you can

[sophistikid]

ack, i got cut off, lol. I was saying: you can ALWAYS flip out on me =)

[sophistikid]

where are you

[daisyclover]

workin' nine to five. workin' for a livin'.