If you want me to post more then don't be gay

this one time, i farted... and something came out!!!

Whenever I am on vacation and I want a picture of everyone I am with, including myself, and i have to ask someone I don't know to take a picture of us. I always look for the fattest person. So if he tries to run off with my camera, I can catch him.

Nobody can ever be as funny as Carlos Mencia is unfunny.

The longer I wait to write another entry, the more funny it has to be to compensate for the time off.

That’s why certain blogs die. After a few weeks, there just nothing funny enough on earth to post. Likewise, this is why shitty blogs can update 40 times a day.

In summation, this post, though short, may have saved My blog.

Fewf.

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I was behind someone in a the line at wal-mart that was picking up a few things. He had some cheap wal-mart flowers, a pack of condoms, some axe body spray, and a bag of baby carrots ( Read more... )

What if life had a Frequently Asked Questions section? I think it would humorously resemble this:

FAQ:

1) Q: What?
A: I didn’t say anything.

2) Q: Who is it?
A: It’s me, stinky-head! Open the door!

3) Q: Hey What’s up?
A: Not much. What’s up with you?

4) Q: Not much. What’s up with you?
A: Not much, not much.

5) Q: Double or nothing?A: ( Read more... )

One of the least funniest things in the world is turning on “Who’s Line is it Anyway” in the middle of one of their games.

“What the hell? Wayne Brady is… dancing I guess? I dunno. Why is Ryan Stiles acting like some sort of french dog. Where’s my sandwich? My god I’m thirsty. You know I haven’t showered in 4 weeks. Can the pope masturbate?”
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imagine if bidets shot potatoes instead of water. that'd be pretty terrible.