Dancing

[dancingguy]

In a couple of places, there have been threads / comments about dacning, getting dance partners, interactions between older males and "cute young things", etc. I'm going to comment here, and post likes elsewhere, so that I can get all my thoughts on this in one place.

1: Compliments.
A couple of people (purchasemonkey and corpsefairy come immediately to mind) have

Comments

[satyrlovesong]

For the record, I'm a lousy dancer but I love the spins. I don't get out to dance often, so I always let folks know in advance when I'm going to, and they conspire to make sure I have a good time. I'm not at all hesitant to ask a fellow to dance and try to make sure I dance with at least one stranger (preferably someone lurking shyly in the corner) at every Gaskells - even if we spend the whole time giggling and tripping over eachother's feet.

[whitechocchip]

Ditto. Only I have bad ankles so the polka is not for me :) My favourite dance is actually the Congress of Vienna. I do believe that Greg was once of the first people I danced with, so he knows how awful I can be :D

[capnkjb]

Semi-random: I prefer to polka with people who are larger than I am, if only because polkas are quick, athletic dances where it is easier (and more fun) for me to keep up if the person I'm dancing with can really sling me around but not knock my feet out from under me. I dunno. I just enjoy it because it helps make a crazy dance even crazier and I'm afraid I'll hurt someone smaller somehow.

/semi-random

[dancingguy]

I can see that.

As the person who's expected to do the "slinging around", I prefer someone smaller than me, so that I can keep us under control.

[targeter]

Honestly, if I'm wearing something that I've just pulled out of my closet, I'd rather hear #3 or #4. However, if I'm wearing something that I've put hours of work into, and so the purpose of wearing the outfit is more to show off the outfit than to display myself, I'd rather hear #1 or #2.

[dancingguy]

Ah, the difference between the person who made it, and the person who's just wearing it. :-)

Good point.

[dancingguy]

On further thought, I've come up with "Greg's claim of how he behaves, which is hopefully true about the past, and will definitely be true for the future." :-)

Note: This is assuming that I see you in something that I think looks good, and looks good on you. I do not lie w/ my compliments. I will usually chose to withhold a negative remark (I have to know you well, and know you want the truth, in order to tell you "that dress looks horrible on you, next time wear something else", and even then, I'm going to tell you at the end of the evening, not the beginning), but I'm not going to tell you an outfit looks great on you if I think it doesn't

[corpsefairy]

Regarding compliments, not every compliment is created equal. Context is very important, and the same compliment said to two different people may have different effects. I am going to answer that yes, I am very different from you

[edge_of_within]

"Saying that an outfit flatters me tells me that you are paying attention to my body, which I may or may not want to hear. I almost certainly don't

[corpsefairy]

Just for clarification, who are you again? I don't mean this in a snotty way, but I could not deduce who you are from your LJ user profile, but I am sure we would probably recognize you if there was a name or a user picture to match to your username. kthanxbye

[corpsefairy]

Okay, the fact that an anonymous person just asked me to identify myself is pretty funny.

[edge_of_within]

I'm totally disturbed by how much I agree with your points.

"just last weekend I took the opportuntity to point out to a 16 year olds' boyfriend that, whether or not he found her mother intimidating, I am available for backup, and I like to shoot things. While my comment was serious, I highly doubt it wsa necessary."
Vast expanses of land differentiate what you just described, and what Josh did.
(I know you weren't making a direct comparison. I was.)

Being a costume nut, I agree with Laura regarding the 1-4 options thing.

[dancingguy]

I'm totally disturbed by how much I agree with your points.

That's ok, you did the same to me recently, too. :-)

Sam, Josh and I agree even less often than you and I agree.

As for agreeign with Laura, so do I. :-) Or, at least, I would if I ever actually made something, rather than paying others to make it. :-)

[dancingguy]

So, Sam, have you danced w/ Adrienne?

[edge_of_within]

It's bugging me that I have absolutely no idea who that is.

I'm better with faces - do you have a picture?

re: Debbie - I agree. And I'm totally sad that her (jealous) now-husband came between us. He banned her from dancing with me.
Yes, really.
No, we have never dated, or even thought about dating.
I loved her as a dance partner. And now - nothing.