The Hunter and the Hunted 18/?
Title: The Hunter and the Hunted 18/?
Part 18: “Don’t Look Behind”
Authors: art_of_mayhem and candygramme
Rated: PG 13 for language and adult situations.
Pairing: Dean Winchester/Alex Krycek
Spoilers: Vague for the X-Files “Terma” and “Requiem”
Warning: Slash
Word count: 3,712
Disclaimer: Dean and his family belong to Eric Kripke and Supernatural, and Alex belongs to Chris Carter and the X-Files. We own nothing. We are doing this for love and not money.
Author’s notes: After losing contact with each other during the time Sam was at college, Alex and Dean meet again, but now Sam is back and dad’s gone missing.
The quoted song is “Sleep,” by Poets of the Fall.
Part 17
Part 16
Part 15
Part 14
Part 13
Part 12
Part 11
Part 10
Part 9
Part 8
Part 7
Part 6
Part 5
Part 4
Part 3
Part 2
Part 1
~~~~~~~oo(O)oo~~~~~~~
Try as you might you try to give it up
Seems to be holding on fast
It's hand in your hand
A shadow over you
A beggar for soul in your face
Still it don't matter if you won't listen
If you won't let it follow you
You just need to heal
Make good all your lies
Move on and don't look behind
Minutes, hours ticked by with no sign of the two brothers. Alex was left in the cold dark with silence as his only companion. Within the circle, the leaves didn't move. There were no chirping birds, no insects, nothing moved. It was like those moments directors strive for in their movies, but this one was real. Alex paced. From time to time he circled and called, but the gate remained obstinately closed. In the end he sank down on the rock and buried his face in his hands.
It was full dark when something finally happened. There was a rushing of wind and a sound as if a harp was being played. Alex started up, and suddenly Dean appeared, looking battered. Within his arms he held his brother, Sam. Dean's face showed only worry as he held his brother in his arms. Ignoring Alex, he turned and started walking, towards the thick brush on his way back to the car.
"Dean?" Alex watched him go, waited for him to say something, and when there was only silence, he felt the cold bite of certainty as he suddenly realized just how much more Dean cared for his brother than for him. The knowledge that Spender, in taking him from the hospital all those years ago, had not only robbed him of his love of the moment, but also any chance he had of really finding future happiness.
"Too late," he growled, voice hoarse with the sorrow he wouldn't voice. "You should've been mine, but I'm too fucking late, and long, lean and loathsome there is gonna win." He kicked at the rock that was the gateway, and was about to turn and follow Dean, when there was a shimmering, a sound like a silenced pistol, and a creature materialized, standing on it.
Alex's first impression was of a white faced, white haired man of a height even greater than Sam Winchester's. The man was slender, with whipcord muscles that were exposed by the sleeveless leather jerkin he wore. The creature's long white hair was held back in braids, and his ears were long and pointed. His eyes were red and glowed like jewels in a face that wore the most arrogant expression Alex had ever seen.
"Stand back!" said the being. "You will not impede me. They must be caught."
"The fuck...?" Alex drew his gun. "You'll have to get past me first."
Dean's head turned when he heard the voice. He set Sam down then reached behind him, drawing his gun. "Over my dead body are you gonna take my brother," Dean snarled. "You aren't taking anyone any more." He raised the gun he was holding tight in his grip. "You are just gonna have to live with letting us go." An idea was forming in his mind, but he stayed beside Sam, not risking moving away from his brother.
Alex had his gun out as well, and was warily watching the tall, pale warrior. The creature bore a large broadsword, and appeared to be prepared to use it. It grimaced at Alex and raised the sword as it ran towards him. Alex, an incredulous smirk on his face, sidestepped and fired at the thing's shoulder as it passed.
There was a scream, and the creature halted, dropping the sword and staggering back as the black blood began to stain his jerkin. "What have you done, damaged one? How has this happened?"
"I shot you," said Alex. "That one was just a warning, but the next one will kill you."
Dean moved a bit closer, "Wrought iron! That can kill you." He kept his gun trained on the newcomer. "Now I suggest you get the hell out of here, or I’ll make sure you never see the Sugar Plum Fairy ever again." There was snarl to his tone and lips.
"What happened back there?" Alex frowned. "And why couldn't I get in the way you went?"
Eyes fixed on the creature, gun leveled, Dean didn’t move a muscle as he waited for it to do something that would give him an excuse to fire. The pale warrior looked scornfully at Dean before it started to reach for the sword. As it did so, Dean fired, striking it in the head. Its eyes went wide for a moment before life slipped from it.
Lowering his arm, Dean crossed over to where the thing lay. "Keep an eye on Sam? Get him back to the car." He tossed Alex the keys as he grabbed the creature and began to drag it back into the center of the circle. "I gotta take care of something." He grabbed the light body and began to circle the portal, performing the same ritual he had earlier, before he vanished with the creature once again.
Only a couple of minutes passed, but there was time enough for Alex to growl out his displeasure, shrug his shoulders and drag Sam back to the car. When Dean finally returned, he found himself alone in the circle. He bent and took the rock, rolling it out of position as much as he could, with great effort. He stood there breathing hard for a moment, before trekking back through the woods toward the car.
~~~~~~~oo(O)oo~~~~~~~
Sam Winchester was heavy. His inert weight was enough that Alex had great difficulty getting the unconscious man back along the trail to where the Impala was parked. He was just dumping his burden down on the back seat of the vehicle when Dean made his appearance.
He'd considered quietly putting Sam out of his misery. The look Dean had given him, and his reaction when Sam had disappeared had told their own tale, and it wasn't one that Alex had wanted to hear. He had been very close to smothering the lanky young man, before discarding the notion, purely because the death of his brother would hurt Dean so utterly, and Alex just couldn't bring himself to do that. Sighing, he turned back to wait for Dean, and smiled wryly as he appeared from out of the trees.
"What the hell happened? What did you do in there?" he asked.
Dean picked his way back, bursting from the trees. He climbed up the embankment and stopped before Alex. "I told them to leave this world alone or I will do to all of them what I did to their friend." He moved around Alex to check on Sam. His brother was still out cold, but he seemed okay otherwise. Shrugging slightly, Dean folded Sam up carefully before closing the back door.
"Thanks for taking care of Sam," Dean offered up as he held his hands out for his keys. "Unfortunately, the other kids..." Shaking his head, he took the keys, just looking at them for a long moment before drawing a breath and starting to move around the car. "We’d better hit the road back. Need to get him into a warm bed."
"Wait..." Alex followed, caught at Dean's shoulder and spun him. "Talk to me, love. Tell me what happened? Tell me where the other kids are? What happened to Sam?" He touched Dean's cheek, his thumb stroking over a bruise that he hadn't seen before. "I would've come after you, but the gate didn't work."
He paused for a moment, unsure if he should say something, or simply suffer in silence. Finally, looking away, he said softly. "It's him, isn't it? It'll always be him for you. Why don't you just let yourself love him? He wants you too, you know."
Dean was tense, and the spin caught him off guard somewhat, but this was his lover; this was Alex and not some creature trying to harm them. Dean sighed, "The other kids won't be coming back, ever." How could he explain what had happened? Especially when he didn't want to. Nausea rose within him as he pictured the terrible scenes he’d witnessed beyond the portal.
Glancing down, Dean frowned and then returned his gaze to Alex, "He's my brother, Alex. He's always come first." Dean wanted to back away. He had always been uncomfortable in this type of situation, admitting things. "Sam has always… he's always been there, even when dad wasn't. And when he left for college..." Dean looked away, recalling the pain he’d suffered at the loss. "I was ditched by both of them you know." He turned so that he was looking out of the corners of his eyes at Alex, "I thought at one time you’d dumped me too, you know. I went and dragged Sammy from school because I didn't want to look for my dad on my own. I could have, I just didn't want to."
Shoulders sagging, Dean leaned back against his car. "It's always gonna be the wrong place, wrong time for us. I'm sorry, Alex. My brother will always come first. So will my dad, because they are all I have left." He paused for a long moment, looking down at his keys. "But I do love you," he murmured at last, and the words came out a near whisper.
"I love you too, so much you'll never know." Alex could feel the moisture in the back of his eyes building, clogging his thoughts along with his eyes. "But it's not gonna work for us, now, is it?"
He cupped Dean's cheek, leant forward, kissed his lips, a bruising kiss with no finesse to it, everything he felt, everything he wanted to say encapsulated in his desperate touch. "Tonight, Dean? Can I at least have tonight, before I give you back to him? We'll have a proper date, and I can pretend that we're going to live happily ever after." Alex shook his head. "God, listen to me. I sound like a total girl!"
Dean felt his heart tighten. It was also getting harder for him to breathe, and the kiss that had bruised his lips didn't make catching his breath any easier - indeed, it stole his breath away. Dean had raised his hand to clasp Alex's elbow, his own green eyes gazing into a second, identical set. "You know, chick-flick moments aren't half as bad with you," he joked. "Dinner and a show... I think I can handle that." He nodded. "Tonight is all yours."
Dean paused a moment longer and then surged in, kissing Alex deeply as he tried to steal the man’s breath away and finding he’d done it to himself too.
"Let's get sleeping beauty back," he whispered, not wanting to part even though Sam did need to be cared for.
Turning to look at the slumped, rangy figure in the back seat, Alex studied him, trying to see what it was that Dean preferred to him. Sam had a narrow, triangular face, intelligent when waking, but now as the man lay unconscious all traces of his personality were lost. What remained were the sensual mouth and tip-tilted eyes that peeped from beneath his shock of unruly hair. The man was pretty enough, although the mirror told Alex that he was better looking by far, and he was at a loss to account for Dean's evident preference.
He sighed as he got into the car beside Dean and turned to him, aware that his face was reflecting the helpless love he felt. "So tell me about him. He's cute enough, but what makes you love him, Dean? What is it that makes him the one?"
Dean glanced over to Alex as he started the car, placing it in drive before his foot weighed down on the gas. He stared out of the window for a moment, musing. "He's my brother. He is what makes... I don't know, I can't explain it." He sighed. "He's been the one constant in my life... or he always was ‘til he left for school." He continued to look out of his window, scowling as he avoided Alex’s gaze. "But he's... he's not the one. I don't think there is a ‘one’ for me. Even you have..." Dean trailed off.
"Go on," said Alex, looking a little anxious as he waited for Dean to tell him how he'd failed. "You know I'd give anything for you to want me more than him. Tell me what I did wrong. Tell me how I can get it right."
"You have that other guy, Alex." Dean spoke very softly, "Mulder." He was sure that he’d recalled the name correctly. "He is your Sam." He turned to look a challenge at Alex.
"You're kidding me, aren't you?" Alex frowned at Dean. "I don't love Mulder. Fuck, I arranged for him to be abducted by the aliens he wanted to meet. That was pretty ironic, don't you think?" He gave Dean a long hard look. "I think that's an excuse. I think you're pushing me away, because it's scary to be happy, isn't it?"
Dean looked away from Alex again. "Don't you usually hurt the ones you love the most?" He was feeling somewhat uncomfortable, really wanting to tell Alex, 'okay, dude, believe what you want,' but this was Alex, and for Dean, that meant he was not just anyone, he was a man he loved, and that fact made him special. Dean wouldn’t lie to him. "What are you gonna do when he comes back? Alex, you’re gonna be pulled away from me, aren’t you? I'm not gonna stop what I'm doing, and I don't think you are either. So this is where we are."
"I don't wanna hurt you, and I would happily never see Mulder again, if you and I were together." Alex sighed, then stopped. "But you want him more. I get it. It's okay, love. I guess I'm just sore because you've made your choice, and it wasn't me." Reaching to squeeze Dean's arm, Alex closed his eyes for a moment, working at putting on the game face he'd used for every terrible event that had ever happened to him. It was hard to find the peace he needed to present bland indifference, but he thought he was doing very well, and then Sam moaned from where he was in the back seat, and instantly, Dean twitched, and Alex's hard won calm was gone in favor of a longing so fierce he thought that he would die of it. He was considering blowing Sam's brains out, when Dean stopped the car and turned to ask Alex to help him get his brother into the motel room.
Between them, they removed Sam’s outer clothing and managed to get him into bed. "There you go, little bro," Dean whispered as he tucked him in, much as he used to when they were younger. Once Sam was taken care of, Dean glanced over at Alex, able to read the pain he was radiating. He crossed to him, standing off to his side, chest to shoulder. "It's not okay," he whispered. "I love you, Alex, but Sam is my brother. He will always be first. You both, you want me to make a choice, and I can't."
"Will he be okay?" Alex looked at the pale, sleeping form of Sam Winchester, and frowned. Turning to Dean, Alex put his arm around him and leaned his cheek against Dean's. "He looks awful. What the hell happened to him, anyway? How can we fix him for you?"
Sam hadn’t stirred even once since he'd been carried out through the portal by his brother, and Alex was still trying to discover what had happened while they were inside. Now he stood holding Dean and feeling the worry coming off his lover in waves. "Shouldn't we take him to a hospital or something?" he asked.
Dean stared down at his brother, his hand going over Alex's as they looked at his brother. "I don't know how to fix him," Dean whispered. He moved over to Sam. "Sammy," he sat down by his brother’s head, lifting it into his lap. His hand patted Sam’s cheek absently. "SAM!" He called, forcefully. There was no response. Sam was breathing; he just wasn't moving.
"What happened to him, Dean? Did those fairy guys cast some weird spell on him? Do you have any kind of idea how to break a fairy's spell?" Alex was frowning. He could see their date going out of the window, if he had to keep Dean company while he fretted over Sam. It seemed as though he had no choice. Smiling gently at Dean and putting his arm around him, Alex gave him a swift hug. "Okay. Break out the computer. You look after him, and I'll check out how to break fairy spells. There's got to be something. If not, we'll have to find a witch or something."
Dean sighed then motioned to Sam's messenger bag, "Laptop is over there. See if foxglove will work. I think I have some in the trunk. It's good for changelings, but it might work for breaking spells too. It's well known as an ingredient of witch's brew." Dean leaned down to listen to Sam's breathing, whispering, "Hold on, little brother. I'll get you out of this." He patted Sam's cheek again as he got up, moving over to Alex to lean over his shoulder. Yes, he was still avoiding the question Alex had asked.
"Whoo, whoo, go back," Dean started reading a particular article, leaning in closer to press up against Alex, breathing on his neck and ear as he became engrossed, eyes narrowed as he was reading.
"The four leaf clover seems to be the most potent defense against fairy magic - that and cold iron laid against his forehead. I don't know where we're gonna get a clover from, but the cold iron should be easy." Alex raised an eyebrow at Dean. "You used to have wrought iron bullets, didn't you? I remember we took them with us when we fought that siren."
He was suddenly conscious of Dean's proximity. A little shiver went through him, and he turned his head to capture his lover's mouth, kissing him gently, stroking his tongue over Dean's lush lips and slowly, slowly pressing in between them to taste him.
Dean returned Alex's kiss, leaning in to deepen the kiss before he pulled away, lips moist from the loving caress. "I know I had a clover or two in the trunk. I'm gonna go look. The gun you have has wrought iron bullets in it. Try that and see if it works." He headed for the door, stepping out to search his trunk once again.
Dean ransacked the trunk, moving nearly every item in there, but eventually he found it, tucked in a little, clear packet. "Got you, you little bastard!" he yelled, then slammed the trunk shut and ran back to the door to burst back into the room. "Got it! Knew I had one."
While Dean had been gone, Alex had pulled his gun and popped the clip. Now he was ejecting the bullets to set out on Sam. He’d surveyed the young giant's sleeping form, and decided that to lay the iron on his skin would mean removing Sam's T-shirt. He tugged, pulling the garment up over Sam's head and raising his arms up so that it would come off easily and finally got the thing off him, tossing it onto the floor with a curse. "That's not an easy workout for a man with only one arm," he grumbled as Dean returned, bearing his clover leaf in triumph.
Sam lay passive; no sign of life save for the regular rise and fall of his chest. Placing a bullet against the skin of Sam's chest above his heart, Alex reached to brush the shaggy hair from his forehead so that he could lay the second bullet there. "Okay, dude, best put the leaf somewhere. The site didn't specify, just said you should have one somewhere."
Dean pulled it out of the packet carefully then looked about before he placed it upon Sam's chest just below the bullet, right over his heart. He glanced at Alex and then stepped back, waiting to see what would happen. He wondered if there was some kind of chant that they should say, but of course, he had never been the one who was good at those things.
There was no immediate, visible difference in Sam's appearance. Alex turned to Dean, ready to comfort him when he needed it, and so he missed the first twitches of Sam's body. It was only when Dean's facial expression suddenly transformed from unhappy to ecstatic that he realized that something had changed. He turned back to the bed to see Sam's eyes open as he blinked owlishly, looking confused.
"I know that this is a real cliché, but where am I?" Sam asked.
~~~~~~~oo(O)oo~~~~~~~
End of Part 18
Part 18: “Don’t Look Behind”
Authors: art_of_mayhem and candygramme
Rated: PG 13 for language and adult situations.
Pairing: Dean Winchester/Alex Krycek
Spoilers: Vague for the X-Files “Terma” and “Requiem”
Warning: Slash
Word count: 3,712
Disclaimer: Dean and his family belong to Eric Kripke and Supernatural, and Alex belongs to Chris Carter and the X-Files. We own nothing. We are doing this for love and not money.
Author’s notes: After losing contact with each other during the time Sam was at college, Alex and Dean meet again, but now Sam is back and dad’s gone missing.
The quoted song is “Sleep,” by Poets of the Fall.
Part 17
Part 16
Part 15
Part 14
Part 13
Part 12
Part 11
Part 10
Part 9
Part 8
Part 7
Part 6
Part 5
Part 4
Part 3
Part 2
Part 1
~~~~~~~oo(O)oo~~~~~~~
Try as you might you try to give it up
Seems to be holding on fast
It's hand in your hand
A shadow over you
A beggar for soul in your face
Still it don't matter if you won't listen
If you won't let it follow you
You just need to heal
Make good all your lies
Move on and don't look behind
Minutes, hours ticked by with no sign of the two brothers. Alex was left in the cold dark with silence as his only companion. Within the circle, the leaves didn't move. There were no chirping birds, no insects, nothing moved. It was like those moments directors strive for in their movies, but this one was real. Alex paced. From time to time he circled and called, but the gate remained obstinately closed. In the end he sank down on the rock and buried his face in his hands.
It was full dark when something finally happened. There was a rushing of wind and a sound as if a harp was being played. Alex started up, and suddenly Dean appeared, looking battered. Within his arms he held his brother, Sam. Dean's face showed only worry as he held his brother in his arms. Ignoring Alex, he turned and started walking, towards the thick brush on his way back to the car.
"Dean?" Alex watched him go, waited for him to say something, and when there was only silence, he felt the cold bite of certainty as he suddenly realized just how much more Dean cared for his brother than for him. The knowledge that Spender, in taking him from the hospital all those years ago, had not only robbed him of his love of the moment, but also any chance he had of really finding future happiness.
"Too late," he growled, voice hoarse with the sorrow he wouldn't voice. "You should've been mine, but I'm too fucking late, and long, lean and loathsome there is gonna win." He kicked at the rock that was the gateway, and was about to turn and follow Dean, when there was a shimmering, a sound like a silenced pistol, and a creature materialized, standing on it.
Alex's first impression was of a white faced, white haired man of a height even greater than Sam Winchester's. The man was slender, with whipcord muscles that were exposed by the sleeveless leather jerkin he wore. The creature's long white hair was held back in braids, and his ears were long and pointed. His eyes were red and glowed like jewels in a face that wore the most arrogant expression Alex had ever seen.
"Stand back!" said the being. "You will not impede me. They must be caught."
"The fuck...?" Alex drew his gun. "You'll have to get past me first."
Dean's head turned when he heard the voice. He set Sam down then reached behind him, drawing his gun. "Over my dead body are you gonna take my brother," Dean snarled. "You aren't taking anyone any more." He raised the gun he was holding tight in his grip. "You are just gonna have to live with letting us go." An idea was forming in his mind, but he stayed beside Sam, not risking moving away from his brother.
Alex had his gun out as well, and was warily watching the tall, pale warrior. The creature bore a large broadsword, and appeared to be prepared to use it. It grimaced at Alex and raised the sword as it ran towards him. Alex, an incredulous smirk on his face, sidestepped and fired at the thing's shoulder as it passed.
There was a scream, and the creature halted, dropping the sword and staggering back as the black blood began to stain his jerkin. "What have you done, damaged one? How has this happened?"
"I shot you," said Alex. "That one was just a warning, but the next one will kill you."
Dean moved a bit closer, "Wrought iron! That can kill you." He kept his gun trained on the newcomer. "Now I suggest you get the hell out of here, or I’ll make sure you never see the Sugar Plum Fairy ever again." There was snarl to his tone and lips.
"What happened back there?" Alex frowned. "And why couldn't I get in the way you went?"
Eyes fixed on the creature, gun leveled, Dean didn’t move a muscle as he waited for it to do something that would give him an excuse to fire. The pale warrior looked scornfully at Dean before it started to reach for the sword. As it did so, Dean fired, striking it in the head. Its eyes went wide for a moment before life slipped from it.
Lowering his arm, Dean crossed over to where the thing lay. "Keep an eye on Sam? Get him back to the car." He tossed Alex the keys as he grabbed the creature and began to drag it back into the center of the circle. "I gotta take care of something." He grabbed the light body and began to circle the portal, performing the same ritual he had earlier, before he vanished with the creature once again.
Only a couple of minutes passed, but there was time enough for Alex to growl out his displeasure, shrug his shoulders and drag Sam back to the car. When Dean finally returned, he found himself alone in the circle. He bent and took the rock, rolling it out of position as much as he could, with great effort. He stood there breathing hard for a moment, before trekking back through the woods toward the car.
~~~~~~~oo(O)oo~~~~~~~
Sam Winchester was heavy. His inert weight was enough that Alex had great difficulty getting the unconscious man back along the trail to where the Impala was parked. He was just dumping his burden down on the back seat of the vehicle when Dean made his appearance.
He'd considered quietly putting Sam out of his misery. The look Dean had given him, and his reaction when Sam had disappeared had told their own tale, and it wasn't one that Alex had wanted to hear. He had been very close to smothering the lanky young man, before discarding the notion, purely because the death of his brother would hurt Dean so utterly, and Alex just couldn't bring himself to do that. Sighing, he turned back to wait for Dean, and smiled wryly as he appeared from out of the trees.
"What the hell happened? What did you do in there?" he asked.
Dean picked his way back, bursting from the trees. He climbed up the embankment and stopped before Alex. "I told them to leave this world alone or I will do to all of them what I did to their friend." He moved around Alex to check on Sam. His brother was still out cold, but he seemed okay otherwise. Shrugging slightly, Dean folded Sam up carefully before closing the back door.
"Thanks for taking care of Sam," Dean offered up as he held his hands out for his keys. "Unfortunately, the other kids..." Shaking his head, he took the keys, just looking at them for a long moment before drawing a breath and starting to move around the car. "We’d better hit the road back. Need to get him into a warm bed."
"Wait..." Alex followed, caught at Dean's shoulder and spun him. "Talk to me, love. Tell me what happened? Tell me where the other kids are? What happened to Sam?" He touched Dean's cheek, his thumb stroking over a bruise that he hadn't seen before. "I would've come after you, but the gate didn't work."
He paused for a moment, unsure if he should say something, or simply suffer in silence. Finally, looking away, he said softly. "It's him, isn't it? It'll always be him for you. Why don't you just let yourself love him? He wants you too, you know."
Dean was tense, and the spin caught him off guard somewhat, but this was his lover; this was Alex and not some creature trying to harm them. Dean sighed, "The other kids won't be coming back, ever." How could he explain what had happened? Especially when he didn't want to. Nausea rose within him as he pictured the terrible scenes he’d witnessed beyond the portal.
Glancing down, Dean frowned and then returned his gaze to Alex, "He's my brother, Alex. He's always come first." Dean wanted to back away. He had always been uncomfortable in this type of situation, admitting things. "Sam has always… he's always been there, even when dad wasn't. And when he left for college..." Dean looked away, recalling the pain he’d suffered at the loss. "I was ditched by both of them you know." He turned so that he was looking out of the corners of his eyes at Alex, "I thought at one time you’d dumped me too, you know. I went and dragged Sammy from school because I didn't want to look for my dad on my own. I could have, I just didn't want to."
Shoulders sagging, Dean leaned back against his car. "It's always gonna be the wrong place, wrong time for us. I'm sorry, Alex. My brother will always come first. So will my dad, because they are all I have left." He paused for a long moment, looking down at his keys. "But I do love you," he murmured at last, and the words came out a near whisper.
"I love you too, so much you'll never know." Alex could feel the moisture in the back of his eyes building, clogging his thoughts along with his eyes. "But it's not gonna work for us, now, is it?"
He cupped Dean's cheek, leant forward, kissed his lips, a bruising kiss with no finesse to it, everything he felt, everything he wanted to say encapsulated in his desperate touch. "Tonight, Dean? Can I at least have tonight, before I give you back to him? We'll have a proper date, and I can pretend that we're going to live happily ever after." Alex shook his head. "God, listen to me. I sound like a total girl!"
Dean felt his heart tighten. It was also getting harder for him to breathe, and the kiss that had bruised his lips didn't make catching his breath any easier - indeed, it stole his breath away. Dean had raised his hand to clasp Alex's elbow, his own green eyes gazing into a second, identical set. "You know, chick-flick moments aren't half as bad with you," he joked. "Dinner and a show... I think I can handle that." He nodded. "Tonight is all yours."
Dean paused a moment longer and then surged in, kissing Alex deeply as he tried to steal the man’s breath away and finding he’d done it to himself too.
"Let's get sleeping beauty back," he whispered, not wanting to part even though Sam did need to be cared for.
Turning to look at the slumped, rangy figure in the back seat, Alex studied him, trying to see what it was that Dean preferred to him. Sam had a narrow, triangular face, intelligent when waking, but now as the man lay unconscious all traces of his personality were lost. What remained were the sensual mouth and tip-tilted eyes that peeped from beneath his shock of unruly hair. The man was pretty enough, although the mirror told Alex that he was better looking by far, and he was at a loss to account for Dean's evident preference.
He sighed as he got into the car beside Dean and turned to him, aware that his face was reflecting the helpless love he felt. "So tell me about him. He's cute enough, but what makes you love him, Dean? What is it that makes him the one?"
Dean glanced over to Alex as he started the car, placing it in drive before his foot weighed down on the gas. He stared out of the window for a moment, musing. "He's my brother. He is what makes... I don't know, I can't explain it." He sighed. "He's been the one constant in my life... or he always was ‘til he left for school." He continued to look out of his window, scowling as he avoided Alex’s gaze. "But he's... he's not the one. I don't think there is a ‘one’ for me. Even you have..." Dean trailed off.
"Go on," said Alex, looking a little anxious as he waited for Dean to tell him how he'd failed. "You know I'd give anything for you to want me more than him. Tell me what I did wrong. Tell me how I can get it right."
"You have that other guy, Alex." Dean spoke very softly, "Mulder." He was sure that he’d recalled the name correctly. "He is your Sam." He turned to look a challenge at Alex.
"You're kidding me, aren't you?" Alex frowned at Dean. "I don't love Mulder. Fuck, I arranged for him to be abducted by the aliens he wanted to meet. That was pretty ironic, don't you think?" He gave Dean a long hard look. "I think that's an excuse. I think you're pushing me away, because it's scary to be happy, isn't it?"
Dean looked away from Alex again. "Don't you usually hurt the ones you love the most?" He was feeling somewhat uncomfortable, really wanting to tell Alex, 'okay, dude, believe what you want,' but this was Alex, and for Dean, that meant he was not just anyone, he was a man he loved, and that fact made him special. Dean wouldn’t lie to him. "What are you gonna do when he comes back? Alex, you’re gonna be pulled away from me, aren’t you? I'm not gonna stop what I'm doing, and I don't think you are either. So this is where we are."
"I don't wanna hurt you, and I would happily never see Mulder again, if you and I were together." Alex sighed, then stopped. "But you want him more. I get it. It's okay, love. I guess I'm just sore because you've made your choice, and it wasn't me." Reaching to squeeze Dean's arm, Alex closed his eyes for a moment, working at putting on the game face he'd used for every terrible event that had ever happened to him. It was hard to find the peace he needed to present bland indifference, but he thought he was doing very well, and then Sam moaned from where he was in the back seat, and instantly, Dean twitched, and Alex's hard won calm was gone in favor of a longing so fierce he thought that he would die of it. He was considering blowing Sam's brains out, when Dean stopped the car and turned to ask Alex to help him get his brother into the motel room.
Between them, they removed Sam’s outer clothing and managed to get him into bed. "There you go, little bro," Dean whispered as he tucked him in, much as he used to when they were younger. Once Sam was taken care of, Dean glanced over at Alex, able to read the pain he was radiating. He crossed to him, standing off to his side, chest to shoulder. "It's not okay," he whispered. "I love you, Alex, but Sam is my brother. He will always be first. You both, you want me to make a choice, and I can't."
"Will he be okay?" Alex looked at the pale, sleeping form of Sam Winchester, and frowned. Turning to Dean, Alex put his arm around him and leaned his cheek against Dean's. "He looks awful. What the hell happened to him, anyway? How can we fix him for you?"
Sam hadn’t stirred even once since he'd been carried out through the portal by his brother, and Alex was still trying to discover what had happened while they were inside. Now he stood holding Dean and feeling the worry coming off his lover in waves. "Shouldn't we take him to a hospital or something?" he asked.
Dean stared down at his brother, his hand going over Alex's as they looked at his brother. "I don't know how to fix him," Dean whispered. He moved over to Sam. "Sammy," he sat down by his brother’s head, lifting it into his lap. His hand patted Sam’s cheek absently. "SAM!" He called, forcefully. There was no response. Sam was breathing; he just wasn't moving.
"What happened to him, Dean? Did those fairy guys cast some weird spell on him? Do you have any kind of idea how to break a fairy's spell?" Alex was frowning. He could see their date going out of the window, if he had to keep Dean company while he fretted over Sam. It seemed as though he had no choice. Smiling gently at Dean and putting his arm around him, Alex gave him a swift hug. "Okay. Break out the computer. You look after him, and I'll check out how to break fairy spells. There's got to be something. If not, we'll have to find a witch or something."
Dean sighed then motioned to Sam's messenger bag, "Laptop is over there. See if foxglove will work. I think I have some in the trunk. It's good for changelings, but it might work for breaking spells too. It's well known as an ingredient of witch's brew." Dean leaned down to listen to Sam's breathing, whispering, "Hold on, little brother. I'll get you out of this." He patted Sam's cheek again as he got up, moving over to Alex to lean over his shoulder. Yes, he was still avoiding the question Alex had asked.
"Whoo, whoo, go back," Dean started reading a particular article, leaning in closer to press up against Alex, breathing on his neck and ear as he became engrossed, eyes narrowed as he was reading.
"The four leaf clover seems to be the most potent defense against fairy magic - that and cold iron laid against his forehead. I don't know where we're gonna get a clover from, but the cold iron should be easy." Alex raised an eyebrow at Dean. "You used to have wrought iron bullets, didn't you? I remember we took them with us when we fought that siren."
He was suddenly conscious of Dean's proximity. A little shiver went through him, and he turned his head to capture his lover's mouth, kissing him gently, stroking his tongue over Dean's lush lips and slowly, slowly pressing in between them to taste him.
Dean returned Alex's kiss, leaning in to deepen the kiss before he pulled away, lips moist from the loving caress. "I know I had a clover or two in the trunk. I'm gonna go look. The gun you have has wrought iron bullets in it. Try that and see if it works." He headed for the door, stepping out to search his trunk once again.
Dean ransacked the trunk, moving nearly every item in there, but eventually he found it, tucked in a little, clear packet. "Got you, you little bastard!" he yelled, then slammed the trunk shut and ran back to the door to burst back into the room. "Got it! Knew I had one."
While Dean had been gone, Alex had pulled his gun and popped the clip. Now he was ejecting the bullets to set out on Sam. He’d surveyed the young giant's sleeping form, and decided that to lay the iron on his skin would mean removing Sam's T-shirt. He tugged, pulling the garment up over Sam's head and raising his arms up so that it would come off easily and finally got the thing off him, tossing it onto the floor with a curse. "That's not an easy workout for a man with only one arm," he grumbled as Dean returned, bearing his clover leaf in triumph.
Sam lay passive; no sign of life save for the regular rise and fall of his chest. Placing a bullet against the skin of Sam's chest above his heart, Alex reached to brush the shaggy hair from his forehead so that he could lay the second bullet there. "Okay, dude, best put the leaf somewhere. The site didn't specify, just said you should have one somewhere."
Dean pulled it out of the packet carefully then looked about before he placed it upon Sam's chest just below the bullet, right over his heart. He glanced at Alex and then stepped back, waiting to see what would happen. He wondered if there was some kind of chant that they should say, but of course, he had never been the one who was good at those things.
There was no immediate, visible difference in Sam's appearance. Alex turned to Dean, ready to comfort him when he needed it, and so he missed the first twitches of Sam's body. It was only when Dean's facial expression suddenly transformed from unhappy to ecstatic that he realized that something had changed. He turned back to the bed to see Sam's eyes open as he blinked owlishly, looking confused.
"I know that this is a real cliché, but where am I?" Sam asked.
~~~~~~~oo(O)oo~~~~~~~
End of Part 18