I hate that you can’t see it. I hate that you can’t seem to understand what it is I’m trying to tell you. I hate it when I say hi and you NEVER look at me. WHY CANT YOU LOOK AT ME. I used to beg you to look away, to stop looking at my eyes, because it freaked me out. Now, all I want is for you to look at me until I’m too tired to look back. I hate ( Read more... )

I’m subject to an autopsy while still alive. He’s standing over me, tears stream down my face, while laughter shines upon his. He’s speaking, but I cannot hear his voice. All I feel is my body being drained into what looks to be the size of a Dixie cup. Slowly a feeling of numbness is taking over. I can see every memory pouring out. He likes it ( Read more... )

I have a friend, he is a great friend. He doesn’t look like the rest of my guy friends. He wears trendy pants and t-shirts that quite honestly, I’d like to steal. His hair is parted, but not obnoxiously, it’s divine. He has blue eyes and freckles. His mouth is usually sorta closed, but when he laughs it gets really big and his eyes get really ( Read more... )

“I’m nothing on my own, and I love you, please come home.”

Oh how I love my new coldplay CD. I wish I could take all the lyrics I like and give them to you. However, I’ll spare you. I’m tired, but being that I have a severe addiction to writing livejournals, ha… that sounds so queer… I felt I had to do this before I went to lye down.

I’ve ( Read more... )

She sits in her bed, wearing her mesh shorts and the t-shirt she’s been wearing for days, her hair is knotted, but somehow has been pulled together and tightly secured with a hair band and with help from bobby pins, all her hair is out of her face. It’s almost too late to even bother with what time it is. Her pen has nearly run dry with all of the ( Read more... )

 I watched a live concert today. I hate it when I can relate so dead on to the words in a song. For two reason, 1. Because they’re almost always depressing lyrics (and) 2. Because I wish I could have said them the way the person singing has said. I’m really tired, all the time. I’ll wake up from a nap and be more tired than when I was awake. I’m ( Read more... )

So the year unwinds, and the day I’ve been longing for I’m almost afraid to greet. I love summertime, it’s so relaxing, but as everything, it goes by so fast, and then we’re thrown into a new year, with new classes, new teachers, new drama, new everything. This year was filled with all of the above. It was fun, sad, annoying, upsetting, and ( Read more... )

There are moments, hours, days, when time is frozen on all the wrong things. Each mistake is amplified, leaving more time for the pain to dig deeper and deeper into me; each action more degrading than the next, each decision sweeping my existence into a bottomless trash. Do you honestly think I’m unaware of how I misuse everything I come in contact ( Read more... )

I’ve decided that I’m not going to use the words “I miss you” anymore. It makes me look weak. You see, before, I felt safe with you, and if at any time I needed reassurance, I knew you’d be there to help me; but now, I don’t want you to help me. No, excuse me; I don’t need you to help me. Tonight I heard a song that spoke the words in my head in ( Read more... )

Dear_____ (I stole kelly’s thing again)

I know you’ll never see this, but I like to pretend you hear everything I say, and somehow see me when I need you to see me the most. I know we’ve talked, and I know exactly how you feel this, but I hate it. It’s the little things I miss the most. The way you’d hug me so tight before class, I ( Read more... )