I BELIEVE THAT SCRUBBING BUBBLES ARE THE AUDITORS IN INFANT FORM. THEY SEEM TO COLLECTED AND UNIFIED TO BE JUST INANIMATE OBJECTS. I MUST KEEP WATCH THEM FOR ANY SIGN OF MATUREING. IT SEEMS THAT IF I STARE AT THEM LONG ENOUGH THEY MELT AWAY. I WONDER IF THIS COULD WORK AGAINST ADULT AUDITORS. I WILL TRY IT OUT ON THE NEXT ONE I SEE ( Read more... )

I NEED MORE SOCKS. ALBERT USED THE LAST ONE TODAY. SUSAN OFFERED TO BRING ME SOME, BUT SHE HASN'T BEEN BACK SINCE. MY TYPIST TELLS ME THAT THERE IS A PLACE CALLED WALL MART THAT SELLS A GREAT MANY THINGS, INCLUDING SOCKS. IF SUSAN DOES NOT BRING ME ANY SOON, I MAY VENTURE TO THIS WALL MART LAND ( Read more... )

SHE THINKS SHE IS DYING, BUT WHEN I POINT OUT THAT SHE'S NOT AND THAT I SHOULD KNOW, BEING DEATH, SHE TELLS ME TO SHUT UP. HUMAN FEMALES ARE TOO IRRATIONAL TO DEAL WITH ALL THE TIME ( Read more... )

MY TYPIST IS OFF PROVING THAT SHE IS SOME SORT OF GENIUS AT SOME KIND OF COM-PUT-ER CONFERENENCE. SHE WILL BE BACK IN A WEEK OR TWO, SHE SAID. THOUGH WHY SHE COULDN'T JUST GIVE ME A SPECIFIC DATE I DON'T KNOW. UNTIL THEN, I WILL BE BUSY WORKING. I MAY WRITE IN THIS THING, BUT I WILL LET DEATH OF RATS HANDLE THE DAILY POSTING. THE RAVEN SAYS ( Read more... )

SQEAKER DI SQUEAK N SQUEAKR SQUEAK! SQUEAK SQUEAK!!! SQUEAKER. SQUEAKIN SQUEAKER SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK. SQUEAKER DI SQUEAKER SQUEAKER. SQUEAKIN SQUEAER. SQUEAKY? SQUEAK SQUEAKY? NI SQUEAKER DI SQUEAK!

SQUEAKIN? SQUEAKER SQUEAK SQUEAK. SQUEAKIN :)

SQUEAK SQUEAK!!

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( Read more... )

I THINK IT IS STRANGE HOW THESE KEYS CLICK. THEY CLICK VERY SIMILARLY BUT DIFFERENT. AND THEY DO NOT LOOK LIKE REAL KEYS.

MY TYPIST WILL BNOT LEAVE ME ALONE. MAYBE I CAN SELL HER TO SOMEONE. MAYBE PESTILENCE WILL TAKE HER.

KAOS PROBABLY NEEDS HELP IN HIS DAIRY.

After months of inactivity, I give you the glorious one, the repear of souls, collector of debts, the --

STOP. YOU WILL NOT CONTINUE IN THIS VEIN.

Well, soooorry. I'll just shut up and type then.

I HAVE RETURNED.

...

...

That's it?

YES. I HAVE NOTHING MORE TO SAY.

Well, why not tell them about your new pet.OH ( Read more... )

So DEATH isn't talking to me today because I bought my father an Apple Turnover of DOOM (I mean, this thing weighs atleast a pound!) and my father just looked at me and shook his head saying, "You don't think i know what death warmed over looks like?" And when I told DEATH this he got in a snit 'bout being compared to a pastry and such, so he won' ( Read more... )

WHY IS MOCK TURTLE SOUP CALLED MOCK TURTLE SOUP IF IT IS MADE WITH VEAL? SHOULD IT NOT BE CALLED MOCK (SOME KIND OF LAND ANIMAL) SOUP? IF IT WAS MADE OUT OF CLAM, IT COULD BE CALLED MOCK TURTLE SOUP, BECAUSE IT WOULD STILL BE SOMEWHAT RELATED. BUT BABY COW HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH TURTLES ( Read more... )

MY TYPIST JUST WOKE UP. SHE MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO UPDATE ON MY SCHEDULE ( Read more... )