I guess I care about the fact that I can't care about anything ( Read more... )

hate. is just not a strong enough word.

Well hi. I haven't posted in a long time sort of. I do have a lot of things I could talk about, but I have this problem lately where I am unable to synthesize and mobilize my thoughts and inclinations in one direction. So, I guess that's a focus problem then, now that I consider it. Which makes for a rather spacey and indifferent persona. I'm ( Read more... )

I think I'm on the karma payment plan ( Read more... )

Mr. Johnston is seriously creepy, and I seriously started crying writing that essay in the exam. That's all I can really say about that.

O.K. sorry, but I just really have to emphasize how goddamn creepy he is. WHAT A CREEP!!!
I'm still reeling from it. How C R E E P Y can you be?
I mean, yeah I was really touched by that bit of writing, but why do I ( Read more... )

• I've just been so angry at everything and everyone lately. And I'm not sorry about it. Because everyone else is at fault. NOT ME.
• Why can't I escape that organic human need to love and be loved? I always feel so ensnared and subjugated by it. And the fact that I'm so unsuccessful just....drives me down so much. lame.
  


• I'm just so frustrated and ( Read more... )

Shit fuck damn. Eva, you're so fucking repetitive. mmmmmfuckfuckfuckyou'resostupid.

Really Goddamn stupid. Really Goddamn lousy.

Sometimes I get worried because I notice so many incongruities within myself. I don't know about amending them either. Or if I could--or even want to. Essentially, I just view them as weaknesses that someone would confront me with, or try to exploit ( Read more... )

I think I've decided my new life ambition is to experience everything I possibly can, and learn as much as I can. Obviously, I'd want to pursue this with an inclination towards positivity, but I understand that to understand happiness, one must understand pain too.
I just want to fill myself to capacity with everything I consider beautiful.
I'm ( Read more... )

( Read more... )