Had icky dreams last night, couldn't nap...lost time inbetween watching Evita and talking to J. It's been a huge roller coaster day. I think at this point I'm just numb.

Well, I figured out finally this morning why I had such a horrible night last night despite the sleeping pill. I forgot to take my pain pill. Ugh, I have more pills I have to take all the time. I'm so tired of them. Sadly I still need all of them most of the time. The pain pills, well, just need those because I'm not ready to go through ( Read more... )

Don't know what happened, but the sleeping pill I took last night didn't work...I'm more exhausted this morning than I was yesterday after a completely and totally restless night ( Read more... )

Maybe I'm going about this all the wrong way. Maybe I should just say fuck it all and move back in with my mother. No more trying to survive, no more crying alone all the time. Oh sure, I'd probably want to slit my wrists within a month, but hey, that's a month reprieve, right? I could get a uhaul and pack up all my stuff and even get a trailer ( Read more... )

Alright, I think I'm ready to give up now. I have fought for how long to get them to set up my direct deposit? So I check today to make sure it is set up and...yes it is, but it doesn't go in till the 28TH!!!! I would have had the money sooner if they'd have mailed the check to me!! Good grief I'm so incredibly frustrated right now I could ( Read more... )

I have been so lucky the last little while to have the support of some really wonderful friends. It's come at a time in my life that I've really needed it, hard as that is for me to admit. Just when I think things are so desperate that I will never be able to make it, one of them comes along and makes things better...not perfect, but just the ( Read more... )

J is going to be in Texas for 4 days...Texas...so much closer than Indy yet still impossibly far away. What is it with Texas? Master is in Texas and now J is going to be in Texas for 4 days...pout. I want my J ( Read more... )

I just love a good storm. We don't get them here often, but every once in a while it just pours...and the thunder and the lightening...mmmmm. Had the most amazing lightening storm with the rain...it was nothing to see 4 or 5 bolts of lightening in the sky one right after the other...went on actually for a good hour. Still sprinkling a bit, but ( Read more... )

I really hate this time of the month...grrrr...hard to get motivated to do anything, have to get things organized so that I can pick up the kids...I feel like I haven't had any recovery time. I shouldn't need it, it isn't like I'm working or anything, just still not at 100% energy and health-wise ( Read more... )

Hmm, kinda frightening how close these hit to home sometimes...


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