005 / goodbye, 501.

[destrukti0n]

in a few short days i'll be leaving the home i've known for nine years. when we left 109, i was too young to really appreciate the things a home has to offer. the stability, the memories; the spirit it seems to form of its very own. as i stood out on the deck tonight i whispered my secret goodbye.

Comments

[anonymous]

Re: span

[dillie_oner]

really - there's *so* much to see outside of our literal neck of the woods. i struggle to -- can't - imagine myself *staying* inside that vortex. for many - the vast majority - it's just that. a place bound to a way of thought and life from which few thoughts escape, and fewer still return. there's so much joy outside. and, for that matter, inside - if only it - that box - is given air to breathe through contact with the outside.

for now, i've got my say wetsuit and tank of air. i've no doubt i'll be out again.

and back. which is the irony of it; that i will undoubtedly return to my self-stated black hole. i can see myself well-settled (having reclaimed my old house) and happy with all there is and isn't - but only after going off vagrant, prodigal-style, before-hand.

but where, may i ask, are you off to?

and _pity the fool_ who ever begins to think the world small :) - such is no more than hubris self-stricken by its own ignorance of the unbridled potential in every situation

Re: span

[destrukti0n]

i will be heading down state to urbana! :) my sister lives there (i believe i told you that) so i'm gonna go hang out with her for a bit, find some work and a place to live! :)

[sapphirestarr]

i was certainly fearless those days.

haha u certainly were. i don't think i could pull off sneaking a boy into my house. maybe i could, but i'd be too paranoid as it is i wouldn't be able to.

[destrukti0n]

haha, i dont know what came over me back then. i was never scared about it.. i guess i just really loved being able to sleep next to him :) good times, good times! :D

Memories.

[sabiba]

I moved from my "first" house when I was 8, (we had moved when I was two, but I don't remember that) I didn't look back on it with regret, in my mind I looked forward to what new adventures awaited me. I was sad to leave all my friends behind. My mom managed apartments, so I always had someone to play with. I also in some ways regret that move, because I never really fit into the town we moved to. I wonder what my life would have been like if we never had moved. There was also never anyone around for me to play with since my mother now managed storage units. So my imagination got a good workout. I looked forward to moving out of that house, but I did that when I was 20. I wanted to get out from under my mother's thumb and live life on my own. I've moved twice since then, but whenever I go visit my mom I think of all the times I've had at that house. Sitting up on the roof with my brother in one of our rare brotherly moments, watching 4th of July fire works. The adventures I'd have in the back yard. Pitching the tent in the back yard

Re: Memories.

[destrukti0n]

abosutely. as for regret, don't let that take up too much thought. the way i see it, everything in life falls right where it should. think of all the things you wouldnt have had if you hadn't have moved. you could have been missing out on more than you know! :) <3

Re: Memories.

[sabiba]

I don't let regret take alot of my time, usually when I'm alone I think of what might have been. If I hadn't of moved, I might have not ended up the lonely person I am now. Because when we moved, I was kind of cut off from alot of close human contact. I never really had any good friends, and I was always picked on as a kid. And maybe my dad wouldn't have cheated on my mom and done all the stuff he did. But then again, I might not have met some of the kick ass people on the internet like you sara :) Who knows tho. What's happened has happened and it's done and over with. No use crying over split milk. There's always tomorrow to look forward too.

BTW, where are you moving too? You never said where, or why :)

Re: Memories.

[destrukti0n]

just down state a few hours, as for why.. well its time to start my own life, move out on my own :) stand on my own two feet. i've pretty much always had someone to lean on and i want to try it on my own. :)

[pussy_foot]

Aw. That was beautiful. Reminds me of the times I had to leave my homes. *tear*

[destrukti0n]

awh, hah! we can cry together! :) i'm glad you liked the post :)

[blu_mango]

aawwww -sniffs snort back into nose while wiping the tears- I remember when I left Botswana (Africa) to come to Atlanta. I was so distraught!!! But im cool now. Keep it cool, and smile... cuz you never know who may be watchin n falling in love with it :)

[destrukti0n]

awh, thanks hun! :D